Tracy: Luke, i didn't expect you back so early.

Luke: No? Since when do you serve tea to out-of-towners?

Claudia: Seems tracy would like to pay me to stay out of your life. Thing is, i don't need the money, and i don't much feel like going.

Lulu: I have kate howard for ms. Donner. One moment.

[Doorbell rings]

kate: Hi, celeste, how are you?

Sonny: Is she here?

Kate: Ok, great, could you just send me an email on that? Yes, i'll have someone on my end take care of it. I -- celeste, i actually have to run. Thank you.

Kate: Hey.

Sonny: Hey.

Kate: How are you? How's michael?

Sonny: I haven't seen him.

Patrick: The nature of michael's injury is severe. Although it was a successful surgery, there's a strong likelihood that michael will never wake up from the coma.

Carly: No.

Patrick: Carly, i wish i had better news, but i don't.

Jason: Carly --

carly: You're wrong. Michael is getting better. He's getting better. I am his mother. I can tell he's getting better.

nadine: So this is why you wanted me to stay, to play trains?

Nikolas: [Laughter] no, i got it for spencer's birthday, but i don't know how to put it together.

Nadine: I guess it's greek to you, huh?

Nikolas: What? Excuse me?

Nadine: The expression "it's Greek to me" -- it's what people say when they don't understand something.

Nikolas: Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, except i actually speak Greek and Russian and a couple of others.

Nadine: You do not. Ok, say something to me in Russian.

Nikolas: Ok, um -- [speaks Russian]

nadine: Wow, i'm impressed. And i couldn't agree more.

Nikolas: Do you know what i said?

Nadine: Absolutely.

Nikolas: Well, then what was it?

Nadine: You said, "put this train together and i will give you a pony." No problem. We just need a little common sense and a channel lock wrench. Oh, right. Yeah, we have one just like this in pedes, actually. Every dad should build his kid a train set. So this is going to be easy. I just need a philips head.

Nikolas: A who? Who's philip?

Nadine: A philips head screwdriver. Ok, just give me the toolbox.

Nikolas: I'll ask alfred about that.

Nadine: Alfred?

Nikolas: The butler.

Nadine: Oh.

Nikolas: Alfred, could you -- could you come in here, please? Right, ok, thanks. It's going to take a few minutes. He's breaking in the new chef.

Nadine: Oh. Well, while we're waiting for alfred, why don't you learn a thing or two?

Nikolas: Ok. Where do you suppose this goes?

Nadine: It's sort of like a jigsaw puzzle. You've had those, right?

Nikolas: Yeah, yeah, i had them as a kid, so?

Nadine: Good, so it's not really about the specific piece. You just want to look at the shape of it and then try to find another one with the same shape. So look for a male and female.

Nikolas: What?

Nadine: The male part fits into -- i mean, come on --

nikolas: Oh, right, ok.

Nadine: You must have learned this in basic woodshop, right?

Nikolas: No, no, no, i didn't. I never had woodshop at school.

Nadine: Well, it was either that or home ec, and i can't really see you baking a tuna casserole, so you must have taken something.

Nikolas: I only attended public school for a couple of months. The rest of my education has been from private tutors.

Nadine: Hmm. Well, looks like i'm going to have to give you a crash course on everything you should've learned in high school. Here.

Kate: Lulu, you're done here for the day.
Just run these errands, and then check back with me later. You can go.

Lulu: I'm praying for michael, sonny. Johnny didn't do it. He was with me at the haunted star when it happened.

Kate: We're done here, lulu.

[Door closes]

kate: I am trying to remember if i was that obsessed with myself and my boyfriend at her age.

Sonny: Well, she probably saw me tear into jason at the hospital about not doing his job going after the zaccharas, so it probably made her a little nervous.

Kate: What can i get you?

Sonny: I just wanted to see you.

Kate: You want to tell me why you're not with michael?

Sonny: I did it all wrong. Now i can't go see my son without making it worse for carly.

Carly: Michael's color has been better since this morning. Jason noticed it, too. Jason, tell him.

Jason: It seems like it.

Carly: Yes.

Robin: Michael's blood pressure has risen since the surgery. That means he'll have a little bit more color in his cheeks, but he still may not wake up.

Carly: I didn't ask your opinion. And you of all people -- you don't have a say in this.

Robin: Page me if you need me.

Carly: And you, the brilliant dr. Drake -- you can either tell me now that you believe in my son, because if you don't i'll find someone who does.

Alexis: I will sit with you, but i'm not going to have a drink. It would be highly inappropriate, and then i have to go over to sonny's and question him about michael.

Diane: We have a police commissioner and several very handsome detectives. Let them do their job.

Alexis: He needs special handling.

Diane: Sonny is my client. I promise you he's not going anywhere.

Alexis: You're a very bad influence.

Diane: Yes, i'm a very, very bad influence. You are wound tight as a drum, you're terrified for your children, you're incapable of rational thought. In short, alexis, you're an utter mess. You need a drink. You need a double. You will thank me for this later.

Coleman: Ladies, what can i get for you?

Diane: What's it going to be, sweet and sticky or down and dirty?

Alexis: I'll have a glass of chardonnay.

Coleman: Chardonnay, and why don't you let me make you one of my specialties?

Diane: Why don't i let you do that?

Coleman: What do you say?

Diane: Ok.

Coleman: You like that?

Diane: You know, i have to admit this. Every once in a while when i am dozing off over a warm copy of "equitable remedies: Restitution and damages," i think about him.

Alexis: Good god, diane.

Diane: Oh, please. From the top of his tousled head to the tips of his steel-toed cowboy boots, this man is a pure dose of testosterone.

Alexis: You're out of your mind.

Diane: Well, come on. I mean, once -- you know -- once we're done, i would show him to the door politely and firmly. A man like this, once he's served his purpose, there's really no need to keep hi around.

Alexis: I hope you're speaking hypothetically.

Diane: It's pure speculation. It's just that it's been so long between drinks of water. Oh, give me a break. You can't tell me that he hasn't crossed your mind at least once or twice.

Coleman: Here we go.

Alexis: Twice.

Diane: Why, mr. Coleman, are you trying to get me drunk?

Coleman: Oh, not to worry, lady lawyer. I'll see you make it home safe. Sweet and sticky.

Diane: Excuse me?

Coleman: Yeah. The drink.

Diane: Oh.

Coleman: Sweet and sticky. I chose sweet and sticky.

Diane: Yes, well, i'm -- no surprise.

Coleman: Yeah. Shame, shame.

Alexis: You know what? I am a mess. You're absolutely right.

Diane: Mm-hmm.

Alexis: And i need to talk, so i hope you don't mind. In fact, i don't care if you mind because i'm going to talk anyway.

Diane: You go right ahead. I'm just going to be sitting here sipping on our sweet-and-sticky.

Alexis: You know, i'm obsessed about michael and everything that happened here with sonny. I -- i feel so upset for carly. I can't even imagine what sonny is going through. Yes, actually, i can, and you know what i'm worried about? That i'm going to go over there, and i'm going to just snap like a twig. I'm this tangled-up mess, and i'm going to unravel right on him and tell him that it is all his fault. He created this. He's a danger to everyone around him. This was bound to happen. Everybody knew it, and i don't wish it -- i don't wish that it happened, but it did, and it's inevitable.

Diane: That's harsh. It's true, but it's harsh.

Alexis: The truth is i'm maddest at myself. Because i'm the one who's really responsible for this. I created it. I knew who he was, and i did it anyway. I went there anyway. I slept with this man, and i had his baby, and as a result, we have this beautiful, beautiful, beautiful little girl. And there's finally proof that having sonny as her father could get her shot.

Luke: Are you sure you want to do this now, popsicle?

Claudia: You call her "popsicle"?

Luke: When she's bad, i call her spanky buns.

Claudia: What does she call you?

Tracy: Deluded for having anything to do with you. I know what lulu means to you, luke, so i'm going to paint you a little picture, ok? There's a boy lying in a hospital bed with his skull shattered. Now, imagine for a moment that that child is not michael corinthos, but it's lulu -- battered, broken, and near death -- because that's what you're going to have to live with if you allow john access to lulu.

Carly: What michael needs is for us to be positive. I mean, look at you. Look how amazing you are, and the doctors didn't give you a chance. And i was shot. It's possible, jason. Everything is possible. And michael knows that, don't you, baby? Don't you? Those doctors don't know you like i know you, and i know you're going to wake up and you're going to prove them all wrong.

Mike: Hey.

Carly: Hey.

Mike: Lulu called me last night, but i -- i thought i'd give things a chance to settle a little.

Carly: Look who came to see you, baby. Grandpa mike's here.

Mike: Are you sure it's ok?

Carly: Yeah, talk to him. I want him to hear your voice.

Mike: Uh -- did sonny take a break? I mean, maybe i could get him a cup of coffee or something.

Carly: Sonny left the hospital last night, and i haven't seen him since.

Kate: Why would you even question whether you should be with michael?

Sonny: Well, you saw me in the hospital unloading on jason. I -- i pretty much said it was his fault that michael got shot.

Kate: You were emotional, sonny.

Sonny: Carly holds me responsible. She's right.

Kate: What carly said was in the heat of the moment. You both said things out of the worst kind of pain and fear, and what matters, sonny, is that you have a child -- michael -- and he needs you.

Sonny: I got to do what's right by my son. I don't know how to do that anymore!

Claudia: Old "spanky buns" there certainly has a flair for the dramatic, doesn't she?

Tracy: Lulu's life is in danger. Hanging around with johnny is a tragic headline waiting to happen.

Luke: If lulu chooses to hang with trouble, there is nothing i can do to stop her.

Claudia: But i do like how "popsicle" there uses lulu as a cover for being jealous of me.

Tracy: You are a bug on my headlight. You are something stinky on the bottom of my shoe. The only point of this conversation is my stepdaughter, lulu.

Lulu: What are you guys talking about?

Luke: Your favorite subject, princess -- you.

Claudia: Your stepmother would like to pay me to get john to sell his shares of the haunted star, but something tells me that's not going be ok with john. Have a good day.

Lulu: Um, claudia, i actually saw sonny this morning, and i told him that johnny had nothing to do with michael's shooting.

Claudia: Why are you telling me this?

Lulu: Because i think sonny heard me.

Claudia: Good. I hope you're right.

Tracy: I rest my case. If you don't get lulu away from john zacchara, she's going to be mobroadkill.

Alexis: I don't get it. I honestly don't get it. We are intelligent women. Why do we keep being drawn to these narcissistic, impenechable --

diane: "Impenetrable."

Alexis: Cliched meatheads?

Diane: It's one of the great mysteries of the ages, my dear.

Alexis: I mean, we're smart. For God's sake, we're insightful. We're attractive.

Diane: Mm-hmm.

Alexis: We have very good taste.

Diane: Mm-hmm.

Alexis: And -- and we fall into these patterns, these predictable, boring patterns.

Diane: Oh, god, alexis, tell me i'm not becoming a cliche.

Alexis: You're walking a fine line. We all are. You, me, kate howard --

diane: Who, by the way, has fallen into the same miserable trap.

Alexis: We both should be smart enough to know that getting involved with sonny will only lead to heartache and gunshot wounds.

Diane: But a man like sonny is tremendous in bed. I mean, not sonny specifically. Not that i -- not that i would know, you know, or ever want to find out or anything. It's just, a man like that is, you know, passionate and insatiable.

Alexis: Stop it! You know what's wrong with that, is that they're the ones that are in control. I don't want them to be in control. I want to be in control. I want us to be in control for once!

Diane: Then why do you keep picking the same kind of guy?

Sonny, ric, jerry jacks.

Alexis: He's a client, with an accent.

Diane: You know what i think? I think we need to get in touch with our inner rebel and find a safer way to satisfy it.

Alexis: Fine, got any ideas?

Diane: Yeah, let's buy hogs. Let's buy big, fat harleys.

Alexis: I don't have time to buy a harley. I have to question sonny. Oh --

diane: Whoa, whoa. No, no, no, no, you need to get a cab.

Alexis: Why, so you can go home with coleman?

Diane: Fine, we'll split the cab fare.

Alexis: Chicken. [Clucks]

patrick: Ladies.

Alexis: How's michael?

Patrick: You want the truth or the carly version?

Diane: What does that mean?

Patrick: Carly thinks michael's going to be fine. I have learned to not get between a mother and her instincts.

Carly: It doesn't surprise me at all that robin would give up on michael, but i expected more from dr. Drake. I mean, you don't possibly believe -- look at me, jason. Tell me you haven't given up on michael.