Carly: You know Diane Miller?

Nikolas: Diane Miller, the lady mouthpiece for the mob. Yes, I do.

Carly: Don't knock her. She's a great lawyer. And she's representing me in my divorce. Maybe she can use the settlement to tie up Jax's development plans for Spoon Island.

Nikolas: And how's that?

Carly: Technically, Jax and I were still married when he swindled the ground out from underneath you. Maybe I can stop the progress.

Nikolas: Look, although I appreciate any strategy that might keep Jax from building spas and golf courses or whatever else on my moors, any businessman worth his salt knows not to place his interests in the middle of a squabbling couple.

Carly: Nikolas, that didn't seem to bother you when you wanted 25 percent of the Metro Court.

Nikolas: No, no, no -- see that, see that was different.

Carly: How?

Nikolas: Because you and Jax were relatively friendly then. The dynamic has changed. You're out for blood now.

Carly: Yeah, I am. And I'm going to get it from both Jax and Kate.

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Ric: Well, alone at last.

Claudia: Mm-hmm. I can't. I can't make out with you here.

Ric: Why?

Claudia: This is my house with Sonny now.

Ric: Oh, really, so? Sonny basically came right out and said he has no problem with our relationship.

Claudia: That's not what I heard.

Ric: Oh, really, what did you hear?

Claudia: I heard -- I heard that he doesn't trust either one of us, and you're on very thin ice. So continuing this relationship right now would be a very risky proposition indeed.

Ric: I don't think Sonny cares what we do as long as we don't embarrass him.

Claudia: I don't agree. I really don't.

Ric: Is that wishful thinking?

Claudia: What does that mean?

Ric: I don't know. Maybe you have got some sort of wacky idea in your head that just because you got a ring on your finger this is some sort of a real relationship. Don't set yourself up for a fall, Claudia. My brother only falls in love with women who have the potential to save him. And, no offense, that's not you.

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Kate: We can't keep doing this. There's nothing more to say.

Sonny: Okay, you don't have anything to say, but I have something to say. Can I come in? I'll make it quick.

Kate: Fine.

Sonny: Can you look at me at least? I want to apologize for all the times that I hurt you, for putting you in the line of fire, for not being 100 percent honest with you about getting there. I regret that we didn't get married. And I take sole responsibility for why we didn't.

Kate: Okay, so, what's the point?

Sonny: What's the point? The point is that I made a lot of mistakes. Because I don't know how to be other than what I am does not mean that I didn't love you, and it doesn't mean that I don't love you.

Kate: But what you're really saying is that everyone has been right all along. Because I don't think you really do love me. I think you love the idea of me.

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Lulu: Maxie and Spinelli should be back by now.

Johnny: It hasn't been that long. Man, too bad this place is closed down. Looks like one of those good places you can rent out by the day.

Lulu: Is that something you would be interested in?

Johnny: That sounds like heaven. I could use a dedicated place to work on my cars and --

Lulu: Whoa, did you just say work on your cars?

Johnny: Yeah.

Lulu: I'm sorry. Well, I just thought you only knew how to change the oil and make them look all shiny.

Johnny: Well, I will have you know I am great with all my cars. I do all my own repairs.

Lulu: Really? Wow, that is impressive. Well, but, you know, I bet you don't know how to hotwire one.

Johnny: Are you serious?

Lulu: Yeah.

Johnny: After all the talks we've had. Everything you know about me, you honestly think I don't know how to hotwire a car? Okay, you're right. I don't. But I've seen it done on TV.

Lulu: Oh, that helps. Well, then it's a good thing that I'm here, because my father made sure I knew how to hotwire a car before I left the fourth grade.

Johnny: Wow. Hey, you don't have to go through with this. Seriously, I hate the idea of you missing your family and the people that you love because I lost my temper.

Lulu: We've already agreed. We're in this together.

Johnny: Okay.

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Nikolas: Sorry about that.

Carly: No, I'm the one who should apologize. You getting that call gave me a chance to take a step back. You know, I've been overly emotional and unprofessional. I have no reason bringing you into my personal affairs.

Nikolas: No harm done.

Carly: But you know what? In my defense, I've been completely blind sided. I have. I can't believe Jax hurt me like this. I guess I just -- I guess I just pushed him too far.

Nikolas: I had the same kind of feelings when Emily and I were divorced. Just dwelling on them is completely unproductive.

Carly: But Jax isn't completely innocent on this. Kate has been throwing herself at him for months, just to get back at me. And he knew it. And he went on and on and on about how he wasn't attracted to her. So, the only reason he did this was to get back at me. So, as far as I'm concerned, he deserves exactly what he gets.

Nikolas: Carly, I'm not trying to defend Jax, but it's clear that underneath all that anger you have, you still love him. So I'm warning you. You better be absolutely sure how far you want to take this revenge.

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Claudia: Sorry, I must have missed the day when you became an expert on all things Sonny Corinthos. Last I checked, your brother couldn't stand you. Never could. And certainly he doesn't trust you.

Ric: Well, I don't have to be Sonny's best friend to figure out what drives the man. I mean, he's not even subtle. My brother goes full out for everything that he can't have -- in work, with women, and in life. Sonny's a walking disaster, Claudia. And the farther you can stay away from him, emotionally speaking, the better.

Claudia: Oh, are you afraid that I'm going to fall in love with Sonny? Is that what this is about? Because I don't do love.

Ric: Yeah, but Sonny does. I mean, for all the man's faults, he -- he still believes that love is -- well, not only possible, but redemptive. I mean, it's going to save him one day. Some angel is going to whisk him off -- take him out of the darkness. That can't be you, Claudia, okay? You don't fit the profile. You know, you're not Kate. You're not Emily. And you're not the sainted Lily. And you don't even believe in love as a concept, much less salvation, right?

Claudia: That's not true.

Ric: Oh?

Claudia: I believe that love is the most destructive force known to man. I believe that love takes otherwise rational people and makes them insane. I believe that love is an illusion ultimately. What you really fall in love with is your own reflection in somebody else's eyes. It's a lie, and it's just a big cosmic joke.

Ric: Well, hearing you say that makes me -- makes me even sadder for you than I would be for Sonny. Good night, Mrs. Corinthos.

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Sonny: Why would you even say something like that? I know you're hurt. That's why you're saying these things. But you know what? Don't negate what we had -- what I felt, what I feel now.

Kate: That wasn't real.

Sonny: Ha! What --

Kate: That's what I have to face now, right? Maybe you should, too.

Sonny: Why would you say that? You were there. All the love we had years ago came back. It was strong. It was better than ever. You can't just wish it away because things aren't working out right now.

Kate: Sonny, what we had were complimentary fantasies, right? You needed to put me up on a pedestal.

Sonny: That's not true.

Kate: Well, I liked it. I really, really liked it. I liked thinking that I was the one woman who really understood you. The one woman who could take away all of your pain and give you a happily ever after.

Sonny: You did that, so why are we even having this conversation?

Kate: I did, really? Is that what you told Lily?

Sonny: Oh, please.

Kate: Is that what you told Emily? You know what? Sonny, I think I'm okay with moving on. I think I'd like to offer you some advice. I think that you shouldn't go there anymore. It's a doomed strategy to failure, because no woman can change you. That is up to you. And you just admitted that you can't even do that. So, you know what? Maybe you shouldn't. I don't know. Maybe you shouldn't. I mean, after all, you thrive in your world. It's when you leave that everything falls apart.

Sonny: You think I want to do this? You think I want to marry Claudia -- cozy up to Anthony? You think I don't want to be with you, loving you? Whether you think it or not, I'm doing this for you. There are a lot of dangerous people I'm dealing with, and nobody is safe around here. Now whether you think it's warped or not, I am going to find out who is responsible for shooting you.

Kate: Don't do that.

Sonny: So we don't have to go through this again.

Kate: Do not blame me.

Sonny: What do you want me to do?

Kate: Do not use me as an excuse. I begged you not to do this. You are not back in the mob because you love me. You are back because you love it. I don't understand why after everything that we've been through that you just can't figure that out, Sonny. Why don't you just own it? Own it.

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Alice: Now you let those toes dry, Mr. Luke, before putting a slipper back on.

Edward: You know, it's amazing. Those slippers look exactly like mine.

Alice: Oh, well, I knew you wouldn't mind, Mr. Q.

Luke: If you do mind, Edward, I can rejoin my slippers. They're in my dank, tiny, little cabin over at the Haunted Star.

Edward: Oh, no, I wouldn't hear of it. Anything that we can do for a man who brought peace and quiet back into this house is a small price to pay.

Monica: Yes, have you thought about what you'd like for dinner, Luke?

Luke: Did someone mention lobster?

Edward: Wh -- lobster it is. Uh oh, who's going to tell Cook?

Alice: Oh, I'll go into that lion's den for Mr. Luke.

Luke: Thank you, Miss Alice.

Alice: You're welcome.

Luke: Oh, wife, how does lobster for dinner sound?

Tracy: I don't have time.

Luke: You going somewhere?

Tracy: Oh, you bet your sweet coddled ass I am. Hi, Tracy Quartermaine. Yeah, could you prepare the company jet please? I'm flying to the Dominican Republic tonight. That's right. I'm getting a divorce.

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Maxie: Here, and there's a bag with food and soda in my car.

Lulu: Oh, thank you so much, Maxie.

Maxie: Why are you hugging me?

Lulu: I don't know. Sorry.

Spinelli: The Jackal brings tidings of joy.

Maxie: It's a little early for Christmas wishes, Spinelli.

Lulu: Um, did you get the fake ids?

Spinelli: I am happy to report that they're no longer necessary.

Johnny: What does that mean?

Spinelli: Well, there's no need for you to take your romance on the road because the crime that would have warranted such an action -- namely the assault on a graft-taking police officer -- was never reported.

Maxie: Yay. You can stay.

Lulu: Oh, don't touch me.

Maxie: Sorry.

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Carly: You don't think less of me, but the course of action was set in motion the minute I walked in on Jax and Kate.

Nikolas: So the revenge is on?

Carly: Yeah. And I'm going to start with "Crimson." I want to dismantle that magazine piece by piece. I want to make Kate Howard the laughingstock of the fashion world. And Jax knows this. So the key here is patience. The attack has to be indirect.

Nikolas: So you're assuming that I'll go along with you.

Carly: I'm a believer in positive thinking.

Nikolas: I'm not sure how involved I want to be in the takedown of a fashion magazine.

Carly: Hey, look at it like appropriate payback. Jax basically raided your home, right?

Nikolas: Right.

Carly: Jax's only real homes are the businesses he runs. And here in Port Charles, that's the Metro Court and "crimson." You know, it's quite beautiful if you think about it.

[Cell phone rings]

Nikolas: Excuse me. Hello.

Nadine: Nikolas, it's Nadine.

Nikolas: Hey, how's the horse festival going?

Nadine: We're going to have to postpone the marriage. I'm not going to be back when I planned.

Nikolas: Are you all right?

Nadine: I don't think so.

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Claudia: How was your visit with Kate?

Sonny: None of your business.

Claudia: I just think it's amusing that you spend your wedding night with the woman you didn't marry, but you're home. So I guess Kate wasn't in a very forgiving mood, huh?

Sonny: Maybe what I've done can't be forgiven.

Claudia: Maybe you don't need to be forgiven. Maybe you should just embrace your inner mobster. Be who you are and not give a damn about what anybody thinks about you.

Sonny: Yeah, that's a good plan, because, you know, holding on to your dreams, illusions -- it's just a waste of time.

Claudia: It's a painful realization, you know?

Sonny: Yeah.

Claudia: Okay, anyway, good night.