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Posts: 3049
Jan 11, 2009 03:20
LG2MasterMod
[Cow mooing]
Nadine: You've got be firm but gentle, okay? An iron fist in a velvet glove. If you're too tentative, she'll get nervous.
Nikolas: Well, that'll make two of us.
Nadine: Stop over-thinking.
Nikolas: Yeah, okay. Let me get in there. Maybe we could start with a different chore like feeding chickens. I mean, I have this great side arm motion for throwing grain.
Nadine: I'm sure you do, but the cow needs milking.
Nikolas: Of course. Okay. All right, I'm in. Yeah, you know, maybe -- should I maybe hold my hands up? I don't want to startle old Bessie here, you know?
Nadine: It's Clara, actually, and just go for it.
Nikolas: Clara, right. Clara doesn't bite, does she?
Nadine: No, no. Except for that one time. God, she nearly took Bo's thumb right off.
Nikolas: What? You're kidding, right?
Nadine: Yeah. I'm kidding. You really are a city slicker, aren't you?
Nikolas: Well, I'm sure you meant that as a compliment.
Nadine: The highest. Now just put your hands on the cow's teets and start pulling.
Nikolas: That's funny. All right.
Nadine: Go.
Nadine: Come on.
Nikolas: Like this?
Nadine: Yeah.
Nikolas: You know what? On second thought --
Nadine: Oh, you're not wimping out are you?
Nikolas: Yeah. Yeah. You're kind of beautiful when you mock me.
Nadine: Oh, admit it, you got yourself into a pickle and now you're trying to charm your way out.
Nikolas: Maybe. What?
Nadine: I know the real reason I lured you out here to the barn.
Nikolas: Let me know if it's working.
Spinelli: In mere moments, Stone Cold shall be privy to the Slavic seductress' whereabouts. Meanwhile, fair Maximista, who is unaware that you are the parental unit to little Jake, has left the premises.
Jason: I'm sorry, Spinelli. I know you wanted her to stay.
Spinelli: Yes, of course I long to be close to Maximista, but not at the risk of her fair person, and no doubt Stone Cold applies a similar rationale to that of fair Elizabeth and young Jake.
Jason: Last night Jake was a hostage, and I decided the best way to get him out was to go and shoot it.
Spinelli: Yeah, but your reasoning was undoubtedly correct. Your actions saved him.
Jason: I triggered an explosion. If Sam didn't dive out the window with Jake in her arms, he would be dead.
Edward: You know, this is a fine state of affairs. I prayed for the glorious day when Tracy would throw you to the curb like a sack of garbage. And now that --
Luke: Thank you, Alice.
Edward: And now that it's arrived, well, the future seems even dimmer than when you were sponging off of us.
Luke: Just the right kick.
Alice: It's my own special recipe.
Edward: You know, Tracy is unbearable, even on her best day. But now she is going to be pure, unadulterated torture, and it's all your fault.
Luke: I tried to stop her from divorcing me.
Edward: You got stinking drunk, and you allowed Tracy to just walk out and get a divorce. And you know what? Now we're going to be living with an angry, scolding, harridan. God.
Luke: I already miss my precious popsicle's howling insults and stinging protests.
Edward: You'll miss her money even more.
Alice: You can't give up, Mr. Luke. Ms. Tracy is a sucker for you. I mean, who isn't?
Luke: You think, Alice?
Alice: I know it.
Luke: You think I can actually win her back?
Alice: I think you can, but you just got to be subtle and tricky.
Tracy: I thought I left you face down on a barroom floor.
Luke: It was the heat. The tropical drinks, I think too much sugar from the fruit juice. Anyway, while I was out, I assume you got your divorce? Don't think this is the end, Tracy, because it isn't. We're far from the end. Far from it.
Nikolas: I told you I'd be a natural.
Nadine: Not that any actual work got done.
Nikolas: Are you complaining about my technique?
Nadine: Not a chance.
Nikolas: You know, I couldn't help but notice that you have an awful lot of cows out there. I can't imagine that Uncle Vance and cousin Bo could milk all those cows by hand. What's going on?
Nadine: Yes, that's why we have a milking machine.
Nikolas: What? So, you tricked me into almost milking a cow by hand? You had a machine? You're sneakier than I thought.
Raylene: A little hard work never hurt anyone.
Nadine: Aunt Raylene, what are you doing out of your room?
Raylene: Well, I needed a change of scenery.
Nadine: Here. You could've collapsed on your way out here.
Raylene: Oh, just because I'm terminal, doesn't mean I want to die of boredom in my room. I'd rather be here, where the action is.
Nikolas: Can I get you anything?
Raylene: Oh, you do have beautiful manners, don't you?
Nadine: Nikolas claims he's pathologically polite.
Raylene: Well, you deserve a gentleman who will treat you well, Nadine. Have you two decided on a date for your wedding?
Maxie: Emma loves you. You're her mom. Not that everybody's crazy about their mom, but she's a baby, and she's dependent on you. There's that whole survival thing going on.
Robin: Well, then why does she cry the entire time she's with me?
Maxie: All babies cry, Robin. I think you're taking it a little personally.
Robin: Yeah, maybe.
Maxie: Emma's cute and everything, but do you think we could talk about me for a minute, because my life is kind of falling apart and I have to figure it out today.
Robin: Sure, could you be more specific?
Maxie: Yes, well, I stayed at Jason's last night, but he kicked me out because it's too dangerous to be around him or blah, blah, blah.
Robin: Well, I have to say I side with him on that one.
Maxie: I was stuck for a place to stay last night after I walked out of Mac's. You know me. I don't always think things through as well as I should.
Robin: Just go home. I mean, Mac will be thrilled.
Maxie: No, I can't do that. That will send the wrong message. Besides, I'm a career woman. You know, I have a job. I should be able to have my own place to live. It's just not that easy to pull it altogether in one day.
Robin: Okay, then where are you going to go?
Maxie: I don't know. I mean, my job may be glamorous, but it doesn't pay a lot. Kelly's would've been perfect, except it burned down.
Robin: Well, I mean, I would offer you to stay here, but we're kind of --
Maxie: No, no, no. I wouldn't want to inconvenience anyone. Who wants Emma waking them up every two hours, besides you and Patrick? But you are her parents.
Robin: Okay, then, what about the classifieds? I'm sure you can find something affordable there. And if you need help with the rent, I'd be happy to pitch in.
Maxie: That's okay, I can figure it out. There's tons of website rental places and -- it's okay. Emma, be nice to your mom. She's the best. And, Robin, good luck.
Robin: Thanks. You, too.
Spinelli: The Jackal's search indicates that Sasha Donev may still be in the country. There are no records of her passing through customs, crossing the border. The Russians were soundly defeated by fair Samantha and Stone Cold. So, why would she choose to remain?
Jason: She'd stay if she was ordered to stay.
Spinelli: But to what end? Surely the sinister syndicate realizes their efforts to gain ground have been crushed.
Jason: I know, but they've invested way too much to pull out right now. So that means that I would have to make it even more expensive for them to stay here.
Spinelli: And by expensive does Stone Cold mean cost in terms of --
[Knock at door]
Diane: Go upstairs and change. You have an appointment to be questioned by the federal government.
Tracy: You have the most extraordinary ability to ignore rejection. I don't know if it's ego or stupidity.
Luke: It's love, beautiful. It's pure, pure love. You hold the key to my heart.
Tracy: You made your pitch for reconciliation in the Dominican Republic. It fell on deaf ears.
Luke: Admit it; we could've had a good time in paradise.
Tracy: I do not call a ramshackle hut in a monsoon paradise. Nor do I call a drunken card game romance.
Luke: Well, we've had romance in some very unlikely places. For example, when we broke the hammock down by the boathouse.
Tracy: Please, you can stroll down memory lane all by yourself. I'm gone. I have the papers to prove it.
Luke: No, it ain't so.
Tracy: It is so. I am out of this marriage. You are out of this house.
Luke: You're going to miss me, precious.
Tracy: Alice, would you help my ex-husband pack? And please get his house keys.
Alice: Come on, Mr. Luke.
Luke: Lead on, Alice. Cupcake, if you gave me half a chance --
Tracy: Out.
Edward: You know, something is very fishy here. Why aren't you bellowing like a banshee from hell?
Tracy: Why should I? I just unloaded a dead weight. I'm happy.
Edward: No, if Luke were really gone, you would be unleashing bile and venom so that all of us would be crying out for mercy.
Tracy: See this smile? This is the smile of a free woman.
Edward: That's the smile of a woman who didn't get a divorce. You're still married to that cat, aren't you?
Tracy: I would never divorce Luke Spencer. He doesn't need to know that yet.
Nadine: I thought everybody might like some tea.
Raylene: I've embarrassed you by bringing up the wedding, haven't I?
Nadine: No, it's just those conversations we had about match making.
Raylene: I'm sorry, dear. But I don't have the time or the breath to mince words.
Nikolas: Here, careful, it's hot.
Raylene: Nikolas seems like a fine young man. I'd certainly love to see you settled and happy before I pass on.
Nikolas: Well, I'm honored that you approve of me.
Nadine: I can't do this.
Raylene: Do what?
Nadine: You always said that an ugly truth was better than a pretty lie, right? Here's the truth. Nikolas never asked me to get married to him. I was the one who thought it up to prevent him from being deported. He tried to talk me six ways from Sunday out of it.
Raylene: Well, he's not trying to talk out of it now.
Nadine: No, but it's only because he knows that it's your dying wish. But I know that what you really respect is honesty. So, here it goes. I am happy. I moved to Port Charles, and it's great. And I have some really good friends now. Life's just about as good as it could possibly be. And I'm sorry if you're disappointed that --
Raylene: Sweetheart.
Nadine: I'm not married.
Raylene: It's everything I'd hope to hear.
Nadine: Really? So you don't mind that I'm not married yet?
Raylene: Oh, not in the slightest. Though you'd be a fool to let her get away.
Maxie: Gross.
Maxie: Well, the price is right.
Lulu: Maxie?
Maxie: Why are you following me?
Lulu: I'm not following you. I'm here to look at the apartment. The super said somebody else was here.
Maxie: That would be me.
Lulu: Wow, it's nice light.
Maxie: Yes, and a nice view of the street outside.
Lulu: It's a pretty quiet neighborhood though.
Maxie: Are you kidding? The boulevard is like a block away. There's going to be tons of cars barreling down the road going 50 miles per hour every night.
Lulu: Great, then you don't want it.
Maxie: Who said that I don't?
Jason: Wire transfer go through?
Diane: It went this morning.
Jason: What about the paperwork?
Diane: Backdated and filed.
Jason: Okay, this has got to be clean, Diane, completely untraceable.
Diane: There is nothing to link you to the house or the money. Legally, everything came from Emily.
Jason: Okay, good. Now we need to set up a meeting.
Diane: Okay, if we could just table this discussion for a moment and focus on the matter at hand. You are about to be questioned by a federal agent regarding an assault on a certain roadhouse. In which you exhibited a blatant disregard for the law.
Jason: They had Jake. What do you want me to do? I had to get him out.
Diane: You could've called the police.
Jason: Come on, Diane. Call the police? I can't risk Jake getting caught in the middle of a standoff.
Diane: I'm sure you had the best of intentions, Jason. In fact, you were probably right. But let's look at this in context, shall we? The feds have been after you for God knows how many years. And now they finally have evidence that you assaulted an occupied building with guns blazing. At last count, from what I understand, from the explosion and the shootout, the body count was I think at least four men.
Jason: Okay.
Jason: So, what do you advise?
Diane: Your regular stonewalling techniques are out of the question. They will be seen as arrogance and contempt for the law. So, for once in your life, you are going to tell the authorities exactly what happened and why.
[Emma cries]
Robin: She needs to be fed.
Patrick: Okay, here we go, babe. It's okay.
[Emma stops cries]
Patrick: Hey, sweetheart. Listen to me, you have to give your mom a little bit of a break here, okay?
Robin: Thank you.
Patrick: There you go.
Patrick: You know, it's the first couple of months, Robin. They're always the toughest.
Robin: Yeah, I know. We have a beautiful, healthy daughter, and we're very blessed. But this is supposed to be, you know, a magical time. And it just doesn't feel like that, because I'm a total screw-up.
Patrick: Robin, Emma loves you.
Robin: She just cries for hours when you're gone. It's beyond coincidence, so you can stop trying to cheer me up.
Patrick: Okay, well, if I can't, maybe a present that I got there for you will --
Robin: No, a present isn't going to fix this, okay? We need to hire a baby nurse and just face the awful truth. I am a terrible mother.
Nadine: You are just about the sweetest man alive, you know that?
Nikolas: Oh, I think that's pushing it a little bit.
Nadine: No, you were ready to marry me just to please Aunt Raylene. I mean, how generous is that?
Nikolas: Well, it wouldn't have been a terrible hardship.
Nadine: I was so determined to save you from deportation that I almost bullied you into a wedding.
Nikolas: No, you mean a lot to me, okay? So, why don't we leave it like this? We won't get married now, but in the future, if you feel the need to marry me for any reason, you just let me know.
Nadine: Well, that's very kind, but I'm only going to get married for love. And if that never comes along, then that's okay. I'll still have a really great life anyway. Right, Aunt Raylene? Aunt Raylene?
Nadine: She's gone.
Maxie: I moved out on Mac, and I need a place to live starting today.
Lulu: So do I.
Maxie: Well, why don't you move in with your boyfriend? You guys practically live together any --
Lulu: Johnny lost his lease. And he doesn't have any money now that he left his family business. I can't live with the Quartermaines. They freak out every time I bring Johnny over.
Maxie: Well, move in with Lucky, because this is the cheapest apartment within walking distance to work.
Lulu: Eight blocks, too far to walk in spiked heels.
Maxie: For you, not for me.
Lulu: I want this place.
Maxie: I want this place. And you owe me for taking the blame when you told Carly about Kate's dress.
Lulu: I'm very grateful for that, but I am not grateful enough to give you this.
Maxie: Finder's keepers or something like that. Oh, God, this furniture is disgusting.
Lulu: And the closet space is going to be really small. You're going to be pretty miserable here.
Maxie: No, this place has good bones, just needs a little paint.
Lulu: And a new area rug.
Maxie: Well, there's a furniture outlet around the corner.
Lulu: There are, you know, two bedrooms here. I guess we could both live here.
Maxie: You mean, work and live together?
Lulu: Half the rent.
Maxie: And half the price of fixing this place up.
Lulu: So, is it a deal?
Maxie: Fine, we could share this apartment together.
Lulu: Great.
Maxie: Great.
Diane: I'm going to go in and have a preliminary meeting with the federal agent. You just sit right there and don't shoot anyone.
Jan 11, 2009 03:21
Robin: It kills me to see our daughter so upset and know that the reason she's miserable is because of me.
Patrick: Hey, hey, that's not true.
Robin: It is true. I mean, this is what it's like. She just cries nonstop when you're gone.
Patrick: Robin, it's not uncommon for a mother to go through phases like this.
Robin: Yeah, the baby blues. Everybody keeps telling me, but that's just a nice way of saying I am a disaster as a mother.
Patrick: Okay, stop it.
Robin: You know what? You're right. You're here now and you are great with out daughter, so I'm going to do what's best for Emma and give her a break from me.
Patrick: Robin.
Robin: I'll be back.
Claudia: I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
Olivia: What?
Claudia: Your scar. I was stabbed and dumped in the harbor not that long ago, so we could compare wounds.
Olivia: Yeah, maybe some other time.
Claudia: You're strong enough to stroll through the house uninvited. I guess you're strong enough to leave.
Olivia: What do you say? Your so-called wife speak for you?
Cameron: Yay, we're home!
Lucky: Yeah, we're home.
Elizabeth: How about we thank Daddy for letting us stay? All right, well, Jake and I thank you for letting us stay at your place during this horrible nightmare.
Lucky: You don't have to thank me. I'm just glad that it's over. I'm just glad it's over and Jake's back home safely and things can go back to the way they were.
Elizabeth: No, it can't.
Sam: I guess they called you in to give a statement, too?
Jason: Yeah. Look, I'll talk to Diane. I'll get you out of this.
Sam: I think that's going to be kind of hard since I was right in the middle of everything.
Jason: Yeah, well, you shouldn't have to deal with any of the legal fallout.
Sam: I had part in what happened. It was my choice. I'll answer for the things I did.
Sonny: Claudia does not speak for me, and she knows it.
Claudia: We're still hammering out the parameters of our marriage, so maybe you'd like to fill me in. Am I allowed to express an opinion?
Sonny: Well, this is your home, so you get a say in what goes on, but you don't speak for me.
Claudia: Good, because if she's well enough to walk around here, searching through your belongings, then she's well enough to leave.
Olivia: Oh, I was looking at a photograph of your children. It was right out in the open for anyone to see.
Claudia: That we know of.
Olivia: If I got issues that I want to ask Sonny about, I got no problem asking him.
Claudia: She's well enough to leave on her own.
Olivia: You booting me out?
Sonny: No, I ain't booting you out. It's just that I agree. Look, if you do feel better, trust me, you don't want to hang around here. For your own good, you get what I'm saying? So I'm going to have a car take you over to Kate's, and that way, you know, you'll feel -- shouldn't take --
Olivia: It's right across the lawn. Now, granted, the lawn's the size of a football field, but I'm sure I can cross it on my own steam, all right?
Claudia: Oh, good, then you should have no problem finding the door on your own.
Olivia: I'm sure you're right. But before I go, I got a few things I want to get straight with Sonny.
Maxie: So the landlord is obviously a creep, but we did it. We are now lease-holding tenants of this apartment.
Lulu: Not sure there's anything to celebrate.
Maxie: What happened to "this place just needs an area rug"?
Lulu: That is not all this place needs.
Maxie: It has potential.
Lulu: After a complete overhaul, maybe.
Maxie: An approach you might consider taking with your wardrobe.
Lulu: Excuse me?
Maxie: I realize Kate didn't hire you for your creativity or imagination, so just go with me on this, okay? Look past all the superficial stuff like the color of the walls.
Lulu: The ancient furniture, the ancient plumbing, the ancient grime.
Maxie: Obviously, this place needs to be cleaned, which would be a perfect job for you because it requires no imagination whatsoever.
Lulu: You can't seriously think that I'm going to be cleaning up this place.
Maxie: You should be grateful that you have me for an interior designer.
Lulu: We don't need an interior designer.
Maxie: Are you joking?
Lulu: Okay, unless you can create some money with your great imagination, we can't afford to buy anything.
Maxie: I don't plan on being broke forever, but until we can afford to replace this stuff, we'll just have to make do with what we got. I'm going to start on my new bigger bedroom.
Lulu: Whoa, whoa, whoa, why do you get the bigger bedroom?
Maxie: Simple, because the big bedroom has a big closet, and I need it. I have better clothes.
Edward: Here, call Luke back. He only just left, and he's hardly had time to empty those bags that Alice packed for him.
Tracy: Daddy, why are you lobbying so hard for me to reconcile with Luke?
Edward: That reprobate does not deserve to breathe the same air as you, but for some unexplained reason, he makes you happy, and that's all I care about, my dear. You're my daughter, and I just don't like to see you like this.
Tracy: The stock is down. That's what all of this sudden outpouring of paternal concern is about.
Edward: Listen, while you were out chasing that deadbeat, the business went to hell.
Tracy: You had me worried, Daddy. I thought you were going soft.
Edward: Oh, no, my dear. You're the one that's going soft, in the head. First, you wanted me to have all those charges dropped against Luke so he could come back into the states, and then when you came to your senses, you went to the Dominican Republic to get a divorce, and did you get it? No.
Tracy: Luke doesn't know that.
Edward: Yes, but now he thinks that he's free to cheat on you.
Tracy: Oh, Daddy, please. Being married was never a deterrent for Luke. He always did exactly what he wanted to do, and I am sick of him having the upper hand. He thinks I wouldn't get a divorce.
Edward: Well, I don't want to belabor the point, but you didn't get a divorce.
Tracy: He's not going to find out, is he, Daddy?
Luke: Set 'em up! I'm buying a drink for the house.
Edward: Oh, my God, he's a train wreck.
Luke: Choo-choo-choo-choo --
Tracy: What are you doing?
Luke: I am drinking from the cup of life, wife. I'm sucking it dry.
Tracy: You're going to get alcohol poisoning and die.
Luke: If that is my destiny, so be it. If I cannot be Mr. Tracy Quartermaine, life holds no meaning. There is no purpose. None.
Elizabeth: The boys are just in there playing as if all is right in the world. I need to make sure it stays that way. I never want them to be in that kind of danger again.
Lucky: You don't have to convince me.
Elizabeth: Well, you have always put the boys first, even after you found out Jake wasn't yours.
Lucky: Yeah, well, I feel like he is mine, even if his biological father is --
Elizabeth: Is a man who could never be a part of their lives. But you always have been, and I hope you continue to be, because we are so blessed to have you, and I don't think you understand how grateful I am.
Lucky: I love those boys. They're my family, so stop thanking me.
Elizabeth: How about we do something fun, just the four of us? Have a little mini celebration?
Lucky: There's some Christmas decorations at the zoo, and the reindeer are all decked out, and I think even Santa's making an appearance.
Elizabeth: Perfect. The boys will love that.
Lucky: Yeah, this family could use a little bit of Christmas cheer, get us in the spirit.
[Phone rings]
Elizabeth: Yeah, I think we could. That will be great. Hello? Speaking. Okay, I understand. Yeah, all right, thank you. Guess this nightmare's not over after all.
Jason: Is your hip still bothering you?
Sam: It's okay. I mean, all things considered, it's fine.
Jason: If you're having second thoughts about, you know, giving your statement to the feds --
Sam: No, no.
Jason: My offer still stands.
Sam: It's not that. It's just -- it's me, okay? It's every time -- I don't know, you know? We go through a situation like we did last night, and it's a high-pressure situation. You got to make split-second decisions. It's all about life and death, and in the end you're relieved -- I mean, I am -- that everything's okay. But at the same time, I kind of feel like everything feels flat now. You know, like at the end of "Wizard of Oz" when everything just goes to black and white? Of course not. You've probably never seen "The Wizard of Oz," so you have no idea what I'm talking about.
Jason: Yeah, I do.
Mac: Robin, are you okay?
Robin: Hey. Well, I would lie and say yes, but I don't have the energy. I am a total failure.
Mac: Hey, careful how you talk about my niece, now.
Robin: I just don't understand because I wanted to be a mom so badly and for so long, and I didn't even think that that was possible for me, and then when it became possible for me to get pregnant with a minimal chance of passing on H.I.V. to a child, I mean, I don't even think I believed that it could actually happen, and then it did. I mean, everything that I was, you know, afraid to hope for, and then we have Emma, and I love her more than I can even imagine, and she's just this little being, and she's so delicate and beautiful and alive, and I just want to do right by her, and I -- I can't. Everything I do is wrong.
Mac: Wait, what makes you think that?
Robin: Because she cries.
Mac: Well, babies do that.
Robin: No, Mac, she cries. She cries the second Patrick leaves and stops the second he comes home, you know, and I don't know -- I mean, I just -- I don't know if it's because I can't feed her, because of the H.I.V., or if that's just an excuse and the fact is that I'm just a terrible mom and I just suck at it and I'm just making a mess of everything.
Mac: You're not. Look, there's a learning curve to parenting. Look at me, I'm still figuring it out.
Robin: Yeah, well, Patrick isn't. He's fine, so why him and not me?
Lulu: You think that you should have the bigger bedroom because of your stupid clothes?
Maxie: Well, that's not a worry for you, and since you don't need all that extra space --
Lulu: Actually, I do. It's called having a boyfriend. Obviously, that's not a worry for you.
Maxie: That's low, rubbing it in my face that I'm not currently in a relationship. And, for the record, I won't be listening to you and Johnny go at it for hours.
Lulu: Jealous much?
Maxie: We're roommates now. We have to cohabitate. We can't be getting in each other's space.
Lulu: It's called getting headphones.
Maxie: If this is just about sex, I'm sure the small room will be plenty for you.
[Knock on door]
Maxie: What's wrong?
Lulu: I know. It's going to be Johnny.
Maxie: It's probably Spinelli. Spinelli, hey, my very first visitor.
Lulu: Our very first visitor.
Spinelli: Greetings, blond cohabitants.
Maxie: And my very best friend in the whole wide world.
Lulu: And the most honest, fair-minded person that I know.
Spinelli: The fashionistas in training are actually living here together?
Lulu: Yeah, we signed the lease.
Maxie: And you're just in time.
Spinelli: Dare I ask for what?
Lulu: Well, we need an unbiased third party to settle a little dispute.
Maxie: Yeah, should somebody have the bigger bedroom just because they're planning on having sex?
Spinelli: Uh -
Elizabeth: Shouldn't I have been given a little more notice that they wanted me to come down to the courthouse?
Lucky: Just don't worry about it. The federal investigator probably just had some time open up in his schedule and decided to get your statement.
Elizabeth: All right, well, thank you for staying with the boys until my grandmother gets here.
Lucky: You know, I can see you're nervous, but there's no reason to be. You did nothing wrong.
Elizabeth: Lucky, I shot and killed a man.
Lucky: Because you were protecting your boys. Nobody's going to question that. All the investigator wants is to go with the facts.
Elizabeth: Yeah, and I'm going to have to explain why Jake almost died because of me.
Lucky: Okay, you can't blame yourself.
Elizabeth: Those boys would have never been in danger, and Jake would have never been taken if I hadn't chosen to be with Jason. When I look at what I did to my children, it makes me sick. And scared. And that's why I need to just face this, so I never do it again.
Jason: During this whole thing, you stayed calm, made all the right decisions.
Sam: I am just really glad I was able to help.
Diane: Sam, good, you're here. All right, the special agent is ready to take your statements now. I would prefer that he interview you separately, but he insists.
Jason: It's going to be fine.
Diane: Jason Morgan, Sam McCall, special agent Thomas Rayner. Well -- ahem -- I will be -- I will be outside in the hallway should you have any questions or concerns.
Agent Rayner: The report reads like a wild west movie, with Russians. Five men dead in total. I've only got one question. Why shouldn't you both be charged with murder?
Luke: Spanky, you still care.
Tracy: I do care, about the rug. If you fall down and bleed on it, I'll never hear the end of it from Monica.
Luke: Oh, hey, nobody move! Step away from the liquor, young man, and nobody will get hurt.
Edward: It's my liquor.
Luke: Edward, what is your fondest wish in life? It's that I would leave this life and never darken your door again, and I'm only trying to give you your fondest wish. Now give me the bottle!
Edward: All right, I'll leave you two to work this out.
Luke: Oh, okay. All right, I'll go. I'll -- I'll just -- just give me a minute, okay? I got a lot of things I got to do anyway, you know. I got pubs to crawl and liquor stores to hold up -- I mean, patronize. Yeah, I think in a matter of weeks I could give myself liver failure or maybe a nice strong heart attack.
Tracy: Why don't you just stop this pathetic display?
Luke: Oh, you won't have to watch it much longer. It's almost over -- over.
Tracy: If you really want to have a heart attack, why don't you gorge on some artery-clogging delicacies from France? That way you could visit your one true love and kill yourself at the same time.
Luke: This has nothing to do with Laura. You pulled the rug out from under me, wife -- ex-wife. You did that, and I can't believe it, after that beautiful ceremony we had in Las Vegas. We had a laugh. I don't know what happened. You convinced me that I could love again. You -- you gave my old heart something to yearn for, something to care about. Now it's just -- it's -- oh, the hell with it. You know, just the hell with it.
Tracy: Oh. Wait a minute! There's no alcohol on your breath. You're not drunk, you're faking.
Sonny: I know how tough you are because I was there when you punched Celeste de Toro's brother, right? And he was getting fresh with you and he wouldn't take no for an answer.
Olivia: Even I have my standards, okay?
Sonny: Right, right. And I wouldn't let you out of here if I didn't think you were doing much better, okay?
Olivia: I know.
Sonny: You know that, right?
Olivia: Sonny, I got stitched up by super Patrick, the wonder surgeon. If he says I'm okay, you know I'm okay.
Sonny: Just -- you just need to be more careful next time.
Olivia: Yeah.
Sonny: You get it?
Olivia: You know, I could say the same thing to you, Sonny, but what difference would it make? All right, you're not only surrounded by danger and treachery, now you're married to it.
Sonny: Well, you're the one who told me I was going to marry Claudia. I mean, so it shouldn't be surprise that that's what happened, right?
Olivia: Just because you're living down to my worst expectations of you doesn't mean I can't be disappointed, a little bit sad, even.
Sonny: Well, you know what? Don't be sad for me, because I know exactly what I'm doing.
Olivia: Wow. You know, the last time you said that to me, we were still dating -- I mean, if you could call it that. You were taking bigger and bigger jobs for Joe Scully, and I said to you -- I said, "You got to stop this or this is going to become your life," and you looked me in the eye and you said, "I know exactly what I'm doing." And I believed you then just like I believe you now. You know exactly what you're doing, and you know just how much this could cost you.
Agent Rayner: Why did you and Elizabeth -- Webber -- decide to take her children to a cabin out in the middle of nowhere?
Jason: I've been dating Elizabeth, and I was afraid she and her children could be potential targets.
Sam: So Elizabeth and I, we blew a tire on the way up, and while we were changing it, we noticed this black van passing by, and we didn't know it at the time, but it was the Russians. They had followed us. After we managed to shoot the second one, Elizabeth went into the bedroom to check on the boys to make sure they were out of the line of fire, and she noticed that the window was open and Jake was gone.
Jason: When I got to the cabin, Elizabeth came running out. She was hysterical. That's when Sam jumped in my car and told me they had taken Jake.
Sam: And then Jason and I tracked the Russians down to this deserted mine, and while we were searching through the tunnels in there, I found one of Jake's shoes, which was great, and then the whole place decided to cave in, and, well, we were back to square one.
Jason: So we narrowed it down to a roadhouse out near the flats, and I managed to get a look inside, and that's when I saw Jake in a back room being guarded by two armed men.
Agent Rayner: And whose decision was it to try to get the kid out on your own instead of calling the cops?
Jason and Sam: Mine.
Sam: It was the only viable plan, given the situation.
Agent Rayner: You, walking into a roadhouse full of armed Russian mobsters.
Sam: Jason knows I can handle myself.
Jason: I gave her 20 minutes.
Sam: Yes, and I went in, I chatted up one of the Russians. I told him I had to use the restroom, I slipped off into the back and there was Jake.
Jason: And I couldn't wait any longer, so I walked through the front door, I started shooting, and that's when the Russians returned fire.
Sam: And when the shooting started, I was able to grab Jake and jump out of the window
Agent Rayner: The kid was being guarded by two men. Where were they?
Sam: Well, after the shooting started, they went to see what was going on.
Jason: One of the guys I shot must have fallen and triggered the explosive device, because when that happened I was standing near the entrance, and I was thrown back by the blast.
Agent Rayner: Forensics shows that one of the men died of bullet wounds, one from a broken neck, and the two others died from the explosion. Based on your statements and the forensic evidence, it appears you two acted in defense of a minor child. And I'm prepared to close the case.
Jan 11, 2009 03:23
Lulu: Face it, Maxie, you're high maintenance. Tell her.
Spinelli: Well, if -- if by "high maintenance" fair Lulu means --
Maxie: Someone who has high standards for her appearance and the image she projects? Yes, I do. But we work in the fashion industry, remember?
Lulu: It's always about you, but now that we're living together you're not the only one here.
Maxie: I am focused on my career. I want to become a success. You don't even take it seriously. You're a dilla -- dilla --
Spinelli: Dilettante?
Maxie: Yes.
Lulu: You're taking her side?
Spinelli: No. Yes. No, no, okay, let the Jackal offer some useful assistance, okay? Now that the lease has been signed and the living arrangement is a fait accompli, maybe now would be the best time to establish some basic rules of coexistence. The division of cleaning chores, for example. Who will shop, will you share food, or each have your own shelf in the refrigerator or freezer? And making these decisions now can avert discord later, and I would be happy to facilitate.
Maxie: Okay. Item one, I get the big bedroom.
Lulu: Oh, my gosh. Let's make it fair. We'll cut cards for it.
Maxie: Your dad owns a casino. You've probably picked up so many ways to cheat. Does this look like a stupid face?
Lulu: I got it, I got it. Hey!
Johnny: I came as soon as I got your message.
Lulu: Good. I want you to see my new place and my new room, as soon as I get it.
Luke: Okay, will you help me out? Maybe I can get out of here.
Tracy: Oh, give it up. It won't work.
Luke: The truth is, Tracy, there's not enough booze in the world to make me get over you. I'm completely at sea here, buttercup.
Tracy: Not my problem.
Luke: Could you possibly look at me? Talk to me like a real person? I'd appreciate that. I'm trying to figure out why you turned on me, why you've shut me out so completely. It couldn't be just because Laura is no longer sitting in a corner like a zombie, watching the paint peel.
Tracy: I bear no ill will to Laura.
Luke: Well, it can't be the past that I shared with her. So the only thing it could be is that I brought this on myself by telling you the truth.
Tracy: Oh, please.
Luke: No, no, it is. That's it, isn't it? I broke relationship rule number one -- never talk to your woman about another woman, and if you do, don't tell her the truth. Just lie and keep on lying. Tell her what she wants to hear. I made the mistake of being honest with you about a very complicated situation with three people who have --
Tracy: I will not be anybody's second choice.
Luke: I never said you were!
Tracy: Get out before I throw you out!
Luke: This isn't even your house.
Tracy: Fine. Go cozy up to Monica, then, because I don't want you here. You are no longer my husband. In fact, you're nothing to me. I'm done.
Luke: Done? Okay, then, I'm done. Finished. Finito. I'm going on the bender to end all benders.
Tracy: Knock yourself out.
Luke: Count on it!
Alan: I saw that.
Tracy: Shut up.
Alan: First of all, you're not really divorced from him. And second, Luke Spencer doesn't make idle threats. So why don't you just ask yourself -- how would you feel if he really drank himself to death? And how empty would your life be without him?
Max: The meeting with the Zacchara lieutenants is all set.
Sonny: Good. Where's Claudia?
Max: She went back to her apartment to get the rest of her stuff.
Sonny: When she comes back, just have her join me for lunch, will you?
Max: What, you're going to cook her lunch?
Sonny: Yeah, she's my wife.
Max: Yeah, but you can't stand her.
Sonny: Yeah, but we got off to a rough start. You know, I just want to turn things around.
Max: Why?
Sonny: "Why"? First of all, I'm living with her, and I don't want to, like, you know, have my throat sliced at night, you understand? Okay, listen to me. If Karpov didn't shoot Kate, I'm thinking one of the Zaccharas might have done it.
Max: Well, the Zaccharas have no code of honor and I wouldn't put anything past them, but what would any of them have to gain from shooting Kate?
Sonny: That's what I want Claudia to tell me. But I got to get her to trust me first.
Max: How you plan on doing that?
Sonny: By letting her think she's getting to me.
Sam: Well, that's the most I've ever heard you say to a law enforcement official, ever.
Jason: I just did what Diane asked me to do.
Sam: Well, I mean, we were Jake's best hope. I'm just -- you know, I'm glad everything kind of worked out the way it did because that might have been a very different conversation in there. There is one person who managed to slip under the radar -- the lawyer, Sasha.
Jason: Oh, if she's in the country, I'll handle her.
Sam: Not if I see her first.
Spinelli: The Jackal must respectfully decline.
Maxie: All you have to do is cut cards with Johnny.
Lulu: It's the only way Maxie's going to accept that I'm not cheating.
Maxie: You get the high card, I get the big bedroom.
Lulu: And if Johnny gets the high card, then I get the big bedroom.
Spinelli: I fear the responsibility is too great.
Johnny: You're acting like the loser's going to get kicked out on the street.
Maxie: No, they'll just be stuck in a postage stamp-sized bedroom with a closet that wouldn't hold half of my beautiful designer clothes.
Lulu: But no pressure.
Johnny: Go ahead.
Spinelli: An omen perhaps? The Jackal has picked a Jack.
Lulu: That's fine, that's fine, that's fine. I know you can do it. You're going to get something better. It's fine, it's fine. Just go.
Lulu: Yay!
Spinelli: Fair Maximista, the Jackal has failed you.
Maxie: You didn't fail me. It was just dumb luck. I guess it won't be so bad having Johnny around.
Spinelli: "Around," meaning?
Lulu: Johnny cut ties with his family.
Johnny: I moved out.
Lulu: And Jax kicked him out of his apartment that he was living with Claudia in, so --
Johnny: Not that I was going to stay, because I don't want another dime of my father's money.
Lulu: And he's got no place to go, but now that I have a gigantic bedroom with a closet for two, he can stay here as long as he wants.
Spinelli: The Jackal protests.
Robin: Oh, you didn't have to bring me popcorn. I'm not 6.
Mac: Do you feel better?
Robin: Yeah, I do.
Mac: Good. Listen, here's a parenting tip for you.
Robin: Hmm?
Mac: When in doubt, resort to bribery.
Robin: Hmm.
Mac: And hugs.
Robin: Hugs are good. You don't have to worry about me anymore. My -- my meltdown has passed.
Mac: Oh, good. Enjoy the moment, because there will be more to varying degrees. You know, you never stop wanting to do what's best for your kid, robin, but somehow you're always wondering if you're going to fall short. It's the biggest, most important job you'll ever have. And in the history of all of humanity, no one has ever done it perfectly.
Robin: Well, I think I established that I'm not going to be the first.
Mac: You're human, so is your daughter. I mean, you just learn -- both of you have to learn as you go, you know, so you just love her, do the best you can, and when something bad happens, learn to step back, okay? You'll find that there's a flipside, some unexpected gift.
Patrick: Hi.
Robin: Hi. What are you two up to?
Patrick: Oh, we were just going for a little stroll.
Robin: Uncle Mac was just talking sense into your silly, hysterical mommy.
Patrick: Emma and I think you are an amazing mom. Come here.
Lucky: Hey.
Sam: Hey.
Lucky: Oh, God, I missed you so much. I'm so glad you're safe.
Diane: You and Sam both made a very favorable impression on Agent Rayner, who apparently is true to his word. So, now that the paperwork has been officially signed, you are -- you're on fire. You're on fire, Jason.
Jason: You can go now. I'll call you later.
Diane: All right. Jason, as your attorney, I'm going to strenuously advise you that now is neither the time nor the place for a heart-to-heart with Elizabeth. And I'm talking to myself. I could be on fire. Why aren't I on fire?
Jason: How is Jake?
Elizabeth: He's fine.
Jason: They called you in here to make a statement?
Elizabeth: I'm meeting Agent Rayner.
Jason: I want you to ask him to explain to you how those men died.
Patrick: So much for having the magic touch, huh?
Robin: Well, it's not time for her bottle, but we've all been thrown off schedule, so I'll go warm one up for her.
Patrick: Okay. Mom's going to get you a bottle, and while we wait, do you mind if I have this dance, Emma? Hmm?
[Patrick hums]
Claudia: What's all this?
Sonny: I told you I could cook. I felt like cooking.
Claudia: There are two place settings.
Sonny: There's two of us.
Claudia: You made me lunch?
Sonny: Yeah.
Claudia: Hmm. Wow. Sausage and peppers, panini, and is this --
Sonny: Yeah, that's tomato basil soup.
Claudia: Oh. Here you go.
Sonny: It's getting cold. You can join me or not. It's up to --
Claudia: Oh, my gosh, I'm so impressed. It's almost as good as mine.
Sonny: Really?
Claudia: Mm-hmm. Just a little hint of rosemary, and you could use a little more garlic.
Sonny: Yeah, I decided to leave it out.
Claudia: What, for me? So, really, that's just very sweet of you. You know when this soup is the best? It's really the best when you can make it with plum tomatoes from an August garden in Palermo. When I was shipped away to live with my uncle Rudy in Italy, I never thought about the kitchen and what goes on there as being something that could be relaxing before.
Sonny: Yeah, you can forget about everything, just for that time, yeah.
Claudia: It's a really nice gesture, breaking bread with someone. I'm -- I'm touched that you did this, that you even want to sit across the table from me, but what's it going to cost me?
Lucky: You know, I really wanted to be with you, but I just didn't think it was right, time to leave Elizabeth and the boys right after what Jake went through.
Sam: How is Jake?
Lucky: The doctors checked him out. He's completely, perfectly healthy and happy and content.
Sam: That's -- I mean, I thought so, that's how he seemed on the car ride home. You know, he is a remarkably calm kid.
Lucky: Jake is alive and home because of you.
Sam: Lucky, we both know that I stood by last year and watched him get kidnapped. The very least that I owe to him and Elizabeth and you and Jason was just to make sure that he was home safe.
Lucky: Nobody blames you anymore, Sam. The only thing Elizabeth and Jason are thinking right now is gratitude. And now that it's over, we can just put this all behind us and get back to us.
Elizabeth: Why do you want me to hear how those men died?
Jason: Because Jake would have died the same way. I went in firing. The Russians fired back. The odds that Jake could have been hit increased every time I pulled the trigger.
Elizabeth: But you were trying to save him.
Jason: No, I shot a Russian, and he detonated an explosive device. The room Jake was in was 10 feet from the blast point. 10 feet. Which means if Sam hadn't gotten Jake out before the explosion, our son would be dead.
Jan 11, 2009 03:26
Claudia: Look, don't get me wrong, I realize that this marriage is a business arrangement. You've said it so many times, I've been thinking about having a T-shirt made. I'm just looking for a way for us to peacefully co-exist, if possible.
Sonny: I just wanted us to relax. Making lunch seems to have the opposite effect.
Claudia: Well, no, you have to see it from my perspective. I mean, come on. We had sex one night, and I'm not going to lie. Physically, you kind of rocked my world. But then you treated me like a whore. And there was no place for us to go, except to hate each other. And now you're making me lunch, and we're comparing sauce recipes. I'm sorry, call me crazy, but I think you have an agenda.
Sonny: Of course, I do.
Spinelli: The blonde ones, as always, are both kind and gracious so they must not take it personally when the mob prince declines their generous invitation in the interest of standing on his own two feet.
Lulu: Don't you want to stay with me?
Lucky: So why did you pull away?
Sam: You know I hurt my hip again when I was escaping with Jake.
Lucky: If you want to go get it checked, I can take you to G.H. right away.
Sam: No, no, no, it's okay. It's just a little sensitive, that's all. But, you know, everything is going to be just fine.
Elizabeth: Why is it so important for you to tell me, in such graphic detail, how our son could have died?
Jason: Because we both need to understand why we can never see each other again.
Johnny: Spinelli is right. I need to support myself.
Lulu: And you will, as soon as you get a job, but in the meantime, I have my own room and half of this apartment. I think it would be fun to share with you, and anyway, Maxie said that it was okay, right?
Spinelli: This very pleasant abode has limited space. Yes, two bedrooms, but one bath, which can only lead to an inadvertent violation of privacy, and in addition, the Jackal is all too aware, from personal experiences, that Maximista lacks judgment to the point of impropriety when selecting sleepwear.
Maxie: Oh, Spinelli, that's so sweet. You're jealous.
Sonny: There are a lot of ways our interests can in sync. And when they're not, you know, we can compromise. I mean, why go to war with each other?
Claudia: What I think I'm hearing you say is that you want us to trust each other.
Sonny: Trust is a big word, doesn't come easily to me. It's got to be earned.
Claudia: I know the feeling.
Sonny: I mean, you know, Anthony and I are just now getting to know each other. And Ric would double cross me in a second. So would Trevor. Johnny is out of the picture for now. I need an ally, one Zacchara on my side. I choose you because I know that you're smart enough to know that I'm going to treat you better than any of them.
Claudia: And in return, I'm supposed to trust you?
Sonny: Well, aside from Johnny, when has any of them treated you with any ounce of respect?
Claudia: You make an excellent point.
Sonny: Just think it over.
Claudia: Where are you going?
Sonny: My father's in the hospital, probably worrying into a heart attack, wondering why I married you.
Sam: So it was sort of a relief to tell the federal agent my story.
Lucky: They're not filing charges against you?
Sam: They closed the case.
Lucky: That's great. Then this is over.
Sam: No, I don't think so, Lucky. The Russians who snatched Jake, they were low-level thugs. Their bosses are definitely going to be out for blood. I guarantee you that.
Lucky: You're not going to let this go, are you?
Sam: Don't try and talk me out of it.
Elizabeth: I don't need to hear about the danger Jake and Cameron were in. I have lived it over and over in my head.
Jason: I'm sorry I let it go as far as it did.
Elizabeth: Oh, Jason, you warned me. You made it clear you wanted the relationship to end because of the danger. And I'm the one who rationalized and justified, and I came up with this ridiculous notion that if we just -- we just loved each other enough that would protect us.
Jason: I should have said no.
Elizabeth: You did. You did. I'm the one who ignored your warnings. And I ignored reality. I put my children's lives at risk because I just wanted to be with you.
Jason: We're both responsible. And now we know what we need to do.
Jason: There will be no contact with me, you, and Jake again.
Nadine: I should have gone to the funeral home. I hate the idea of Aunt Raylene being by herself in there.
Nikolas: Well, I spoke with funeral director, and he said that you can come by, whenever you feel strong enough, to make the rest of the arrangements.
Nadine: Thank you, Nikolas. You're shouldn't have to do any of this.
Nikolas: No, no, I want to help you.
Nadine: It's not like this is a surprise, you know? I knew for so long that she was dying. I prepared myself, or at least I though I had.
Nikolas: Yeah. Well, I don't think you can ever prepare yourself to lose someone you love like that.
Nadine: Aunt Raylene always said that there's something to be thankful for, even in the worst of times. I'm trying. Really, I am. Maybe it's the way that she passed, you know? Smiling and peaceful. It's a blessing, isn't it?
Nikolas: Yeah, yeah. I know you loved her. You've been quoting her since I met you.
[Nikolas laughs]
Nadine: People always say I'm just like her. That used to make me cringe.
Nikolas: Well, what little I knew of her, I can certainly see the similarities. You're honest, you stand up for what you believe in. You got a bit of a stubborn streak in you. Fine qualities, all of them.
Nadine: Yeah, they sure get us into a boatload of trouble. That's for sure.
Nikolas: Yeah.
Lucky: Sam, you nearly died. And so did Jake. Do you have any idea how crazy I was?
Sam: Yes, I know, Lucky.
Lucky: You barely got out with your life. I mean, how many times do you think you can tempt fate?
Sam: You put your life on the line every day, and you think it's just fine.
Lucky: And that's my point. You're a civilian so why don't you let the cops handle the Russians?
Sam: Are you kidding me? Look at where that got us last time. No. I know something inside me is telling me that this isn't over. I've got to listen to my instincts just like you do.
Lucky: So what do you want me to do? You want to just turn the other way while you play vigilante?
Sam: I can go places cops can't. I can learn things that cops can't.
Lucky: Then join the department.
Sam: They would never hire me with my background, and you know that. Besides, Lucky, I am not big on rules. I am way more comfortable as an independent contractor.
Lucky: You know what? I'm not going to argue about this right now. Elizabeth -- she is giving her statement, and I'm just going to go and offer my support, okay?
Sam: Okay, listen, we will talk about this over dinner, and I'm sure we can come up with something that we both agree upon.
Jason: I put $5 million into an account. The money is clean. It can't be traced.
Elizabeth: I don't want your money.
Jason: I also bought the house that you're renting. The title to the house and the money are in a trust set up for Jake and for Cam. And if anybody ever investigates, they'll find out that the trust was established by Emily to provide for your children.
Elizabeth: I can support my own children.
Jason: I will never see my son again. Jake won't have my name. And I can't be a father in any way that matters, so please just let me provide for his future.
Elizabeth: I promise I'll give those boys a good life, a safe life. I promise not to call you or try to see you. I'm sorry it took me so long to see the truth. And I'm really sorry I hurt my boys, and I hurt you out of my own selfishness.
Jason: I was selfish, too.
Maxie: Spinelli, who cares if Johnny wants to live here? Sure, Johnny and Lulu think they are some great love story for the ages, but that's got nothing to do with us. And Johnny's just going to have to learn to share one bathroom.
Spinelli: The Jackal is merely trying to point out his concerns about the crowded quarters. See, if the mob prince moves in, there won't be sufficient room for the lovely Maximista to maintain any sense of decorum for her delicate sensibilities.
Lulu: Don't worry about it, Spinelli. I have a feeling that Johnny and I will be spending a lot of time in our bedroom, which means there will be plenty of privacy where Maxie can take care of her "delicate sensibilities."
Spinelli: The Jackal is just curious as to why someone with the fortune and means of the Zacchara family at their disposal might not be able to find a more suitable abode.
Luke: The Zacchara fortune is no longer at my disposal.
Lulu: Spinelli, when Johnny left his family, he left with nothing.
Spinelli: Yes, and I respect your wise and noble decision, but can't you live somewhere else? I don't know, a monastery comes to mind. A nice, quiet place to contemplate all your many --
Lulu: Nice try, Spinelli. That's good. We're going to go check out my bedroom.
Maxie: Spinelli, it's okay. I really don't mind if Johnny lives here. Help me measure something. And, you know, considering the non-existent state of my love life, seeing Johnny shirtless could just be the highlight of my week.
Spinelli: 70 inches.
Maxie: Thank you. Yes, it could get a little crazy around here, but Johnny is smoking hot, so who cares?
Ric: Well, you're hard at work, huh?
Claudia: Catching up on some e-mail.
Ric: Business or personal?
Claudia: Private, either way.
Ric: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry. Just curious how your campaign to win Sonny's trust is going.
Claudia: Is that what I'm doing?
Ric: Well, maybe trust is not the right word. Approval seems to be more appropriate.
Claudia: Ric, I don't need Sonny's approval.
Ric: Oh, maybe not as much as Daddy's, right, but we all know that Anthony's trust is permanently unavailable so you're going to have to settle for your husband's.
Claudia: Well, you are full of interesting insights tonight.
Ric: I don't hear you denying it.
Claudia: What would be the point? You think you have me all figured out. I don't mean to rain on your parade.
Ric: No, no, not even close, honey. You are complicated. You are contradictory. It's almost impossible to figure out your motives because I'm not even really sure if you're aware of them yourself.
Claudia: You know what I know for a fact? It was not my idea to marry Sonny.
Ric: Oh, here we go.
Claudia: It wasn't my idea, Ric, but I'm going to make damn sure that make the best of it.
Ric: Mm.
Claudia: Sonny controls the power, my entire family's organization, Ric. And one day, he will share that power with me.
Ric: Sonny married you, Claudia, as a means to an end, okay? He's not going to share his power or anything else for that matter.
Claudia: We're living in the same house, okay? That presents unique opportunities.
Ric: Oh, well, I'm sure you'll be able to get Sonny into bed, but he's not going to like you, and he's not going to believe in you. And he's definitely not going to trust you on any level for anything.
Claudia: Okay, so you think I should live in your brother's house, but remain faithful to you?
Ric: Actually, yes.
Mike: I don't know who's going to be happier with my release, me or the physical therapist.
Kate: You're being naughty, I know it.
Mike: Hey, Sonny.
Kate: Well, it never occurred to me that you might be visiting Mike at the same time I was.
Sonny: You don't have to leave.
Mike: Listen, guys, having two visitors does a lot more to lift my spirits than just one.
Kate: No, I'm sorry, Mike. I don't mean to be rude, but Sonny is married to Claudia now, and I am not going to stay and pretend that I'm okay with it.
Sonny: Kate, you know why I did it.
Kate: I know you have a convenient excuse.
Mike: Hey, listen. Guys, cool it, will you? I don't think this is a fight you want to have.
Kate: No, you're right. You're absolutely right. There is no reason to fight because Sonny was under no obligation to me when he married Claudia.
Sonny: Okay, what Kate isn't telling you is that I did it to find out who had her shot. Karpov didn't do it, right? And I got a gut feeling it's one of the Zaccharas, so I'm going to find out --
Mike: All right, Sonny, Sonny. If the Zaccharas shot at anyone in that church, why wouldn't he have fired at you?
Kate: No, Mike. Don't try to use logic. You see, Sonny wants to have his cake and eat it, too, right? He gets to marry Claudia. He gets power over the Zaccharas, and the whole time he can tell everyone that he's doing it for me.
Sonny: I am.
Kate: I don't give a damn.
Lucky: They should have already interviewed you by now.
Elizabeth: I just got finished. It was way easier than I expected. The agent was very nice.
Lucky: What's wrong?
Elizabeth: I just ran into Jason. We spoke for a few minutes. Probably the last conversation we'll ever have.
Lucky: Why would you say that?
Elizabeth: He told me how the roadhouse blew up. And proceeded, in very graphic detail, to describe how Jake would have died if Sam hadn't gotten him out of there.
Lucky: And what the hell did he think that would prove?
Elizabeth: He was making a point, and very effectively, by the way, that we shouldn't see each other anymore. After everything, I just can't justify ever being with him again. And as hard as it was for me to hear him say it, if he hadn't broken things off, I was going to.
Lulu: Huh. Well, it's not that bad. It needs a new comforter and some new pillows, maybe a hand grenade. It's not too late for you to back out now.
Johnny: No, all it needs is the Lulu touch.
Lulu: Well, it is a far cry from my Quartermaine bedroom and your penthouse. My God, what you wouldn't give for that view right now.
Johnny: That view cost me way too much. As soon as Claudia decided to marry Sonny because she thought it would be in my own best interest, I knew I wanted out.
Lulu: I'm so proud of you. I know it's not easy to walk away from your family.
Johnny: Oh, it'd be easy once I find out what I'm doing.
Lulu: Do what makes you happy.
Johnny: You make me happy.
Lulu: Mmm.
Jan 11, 2009 03:27
Nikolas: Hi.
Eric: Hi.
Nadine: Oh, Eric.
Eric: I came as soon as I heard.
Nadine: Oh, gosh, it's so good to see you.
Carly: You haven't returned any of my calls. Wow, I only have to take one look at you to see that there's something going on.
Carly: Jason, let me help you.
Jason: You can't.
Carly: I can listen, you know.
Jason: I can never be with Elizabeth. I can never be a father to Jake.
Carly: I thought you made that decision when Michael was shot.
Jason: I've been meeting with Elizabeth in secret. I've been lying to myself that I can make it work until the Russians went after her and her kids.
Carly: Oh, God. What happened? Jake and Elizabeth are okay, aren't they?
Jason: Yeah, they're okay.
Carly: You can talk to me.
Jason: I almost got Jake killed.
Ric: Okay, here's an idea. Instead of you playing Sonny and Sonny playing you -- instead of the two of you faking something that you're not feeling and waiting for a mutual betrayal, why don't you just take this for what it is, Claudia? A marriage of convenience, you know? You stay out of Sonny's way, I guarantee you, he's going to stay out of yours.
Claudia: I don't want to stay out of Sonny's way.
Ric: Okay, well, then I'm -- you're opening yourself up for a world of misery. And I'm not sure that I can just stand by and watch that happen.
Claudia: I'd be really sad to lose you.
Ric: Oh, but you'll live with it, right?
Claudia: What do you want me to say? What do you want me to say? I've never trusted anybody in my entire life, except my kid brother, and I'm supposed to just start with you, because we're outsiders? And we've been screwed over by our respective fathers? And we're great in bed together?
Ric: Yeah, that's exactly what I want you to say, Claudia. I want you to acknowledge that we are a lot alike. And I also want you to acknowledge that we can be good together.
Claudia: Maybe. Maybe you just want to take away your brother's wife. Even a wife he doesn't particularly want.
Ric: Okay. Well, you're going to get what you want anyway, so don't let me stand in your way.
Claudia: Ric, don't go away.
Ric: What do you expect from me, Claudia?
Claudia: I just look -- I'm complicated, okay? I'm contradictory, remember? But I am smart enough to know that you're right. We could be very, very good together. Maybe we will be as soon as I get what I want from Sonny.
Mike: Listen -- try to remember, you two. Listen, if things had gone differently, you would have been married now.
Kate: I don't know, Mike. Maybe it's a blessing that we're not, right? I mean, I didn't enjoy being shot a second time, but it was a vivid demonstration of how I don't fit in Sonny's world.
Sonny: Why are you doing this?
Kate: What? I'm sorry, is the truth uncomfortable?
Sonny: No, it's not uncomfortable, because you're the one who -- you're putting up an act right now, because you're the fashion publisher, the big deal --
Kate: No, there is no act. I am simply bowing to the inevitability that we don't fit, Sonny. Our lives don't fit.
Sonny: Okay, if you want us to be over so bad, right? Why are you so mad then? What's the big deal?
Kate: I wasted a year of my life investing in a dream that had no possibility of coming true.
Sonny: Well --
Kate: I slept with Jax. And I'm not saying it now to you to try to hurt you. I just want to be very clear.
Sonny: That's not right.
Kate: Yeah, it's not right. You married another woman, right? Right, so, I slept with another man. And now we have a definitive end to our relationship. So whatever you do now, Sonny, don't say you're doing it for me.
Spinelli: Per the Jackal's measurements, your room is less than a foot smaller than the original blonde one's. And if you stand in just the right spot and look across the building and around a tree, you can almost see the harbor.
Maxie: Thanks, Spinelli. I totally overreacted. It's just the advertisement said there was a master bedroom, and then Lulu took it. But you're right. One foot, that's not a big deal. And I do have a better view; therefore my room is the best.
Spinelli: You see, it's just -- it's important that you embrace the move. That it's not simply a reaction to your conflict with his commissionership over our friendship.
Maxie: I do embrace it. I embrace it a ton. Look, Mac is a fun, loving, amazing person, but he had no business telling me you couldn't be my friend. And he should have known better than to give me ultimatums. It was time to for me to move out. And this place is perfect.
Johnny's voice: Oh, Lulu.
[Lulu moaning]
Maxie: Once I get used to that.
Spinelli: The Jackal will make a personal request to the mob prince and the blonde one that they are more respectful of your space.
Maxie: Spinelli, you really don't want to interrupt Johnny and Lulu having sex.
Spinelli: Sex? Are you sure?
[Johnny moaning]
[Lulu laughing]
Maxie: That's the sound of me being sure.
Spinelli: Ah. Perhaps now would be a propitious time for us to go fetch a steaming latte?
Maxie: No, no way. They're not driving me out of my brand-new home. I'm going to stay here and fix up my room. You're welcome to stay if you want.
[Johnny laughing]
Johnny's voice: Oh-ho!
[Johnny grunting]
Spinelli: I think I'm just going to return to casa de stone cold and see if he has any cyber assistance that he needs.
Johnny's voice: Yeah.
Eric: So good to see you, too. I'm sorry it has to be like this.
Nadine: Yeah, oh, Nikolas, come meet an old friend from high school. Eric Holt, this is Nikolas Cassadine. Eric is like this amazing attorney.
Eric: Oh, now, she's prejudiced. The ink was barely dry on my degree when Raylene knocked on my door and asked me to write up her will. Not many people would give a new lawyer a chance. She was a wonderful woman. Nikolas: Yes, yes, she was. I wish I would have gotten to know her better.
Eric: I hate to bring this up right now, but Raylene was very specific with her requests, and she insisted that the family hear her will early.
Nadine: How early?
Eric: Right after the funeral service. Vance and your cousin Bo have to be notified.
Nadine: Okay.
Eric: But you should know, Raylene left you something very important.
Mike: Sonny, Sonny, come here. Listen to me. Listen, Kate is angry. And I'm sure once she has a chance to think things through she'll --
Sonny: There's no way -- how can you make it better? It's what it is. All right, let's leave it at that. I don't want to talk about it --
Mike: But she's hurt because you married Claudia. That's the only reason she would have been with Jax.
Sonny: I drove her to it. Sleeping with him -- Jax of all people, I mean, you know what I mean? I don't feel good about it. Makes me want to punch a wall.
Mike: Okay, okay. What do you do now?
Sonny: I'm already doing it. No one's safe around here, Mike. I married Claudia for two reasons. One, to take over the Zacchara organization, right, because Jason doesn't want me involved anymore, right? Two, to find out who shot Kate.
Mike: Okay, well, you know something? Just for your information, Sonny, I'm going to have a real problem if you die in the attempt.
Sonny: I'm not going to die, mike. If I haven't died yet, ain't going to happen.
Mike: Okay, ain't going to happen. What's next? What do you do next?
Sonny: Okay, Anthony already transferred his power over to me, right? I'm getting to know his lieutenants and everybody in there. In six months, his people aren't going to remember anybody they work for, except me.
Mike: Okay, and what about Claudia? Your wife, remember her? What about her?
Sonny: Do you have to remind me? Um, Claudia wants power, right? She says it's for her brother, but I know it's for herself. She's going to try to play me, and I'm just going to play along.
Mike: Okay, but what's that going to get you?
Sonny: I'll tell you. I need to know the Zacchara secrets, because I cannot wait to find out who shot Kate.
Mike: And even if you do find out, do you really think that's going to change things with Kate?
Sonny: I'm hoping I can change her mind, but ultimately, it's Kate's decision. But I got to find out who shot her.
Jason: The place we were in was wired to blow, and I had no idea. I went in firing. The next thing I know I was lying on my back. I couldn't hear. I could barely see. All I could smell was fire. I finally made it to my feet, and I saw the building was in flames. I thought I was watching my son being burned to death. I can never let myself forget that moment. How it felt, because it erased every lie I ever told myself. Nobody is safe. Nobody.
Elizabeth: I should be grateful. I learned my lesson just this side of what could have been a tragedy.
Lucky: Jake, he came back to us safely.
Elizabeth: I feel like I've been given a second try. Somehow, God decided to let me try it again to prove that I'm not the worst mother in the world.
Lucky: You're not.
Elizabeth: I put my children's well-being second to my own.
Lucky: You invested a lot of yourself to love Jason. I agree it's the right decision to end your relationship with him, but it doesn't make it any easier.
Elizabeth: Look at you. You should be furious with me right now, because I screwed up so badly.
Lucky: And how many times have I made a mistake? How many times have you forgiven me?
Elizabeth: There's something else you should know. Jason opened up a trust fund for Jake and Cameron.
Lucky: Mob money.
Elizabeth: No, he swears it's legitimate. He set it up to make it look like it came from Emily. Lucky, it's the only thing Jason can do for Jake. I don't think it would be fair to the boys if you or I refused it.
Lucky: I wouldn't do that to them.
Elizabeth: Thanks. So, Jason will go on with his life, and the boys and I will go on with ours. I'm not quite sure how yet, but I'm sure in the morning it will all make sense.
Lucky: I know you can go on and make a great life. If you ever feel like you're going to fall, I'll be there to catch you.
Elizabeth: Thank you. Thank you for being the kind of friend you are to me and the kind of dad you are to the boys.
Lucky: Come on. Let me give you a ride home.
[Johnny and Lulu laughing]
Maxie: This is rude and inconsiderate! If you're going to be this noisy, you might as well have sex in the living room.
Lulu: Is there something wrong, Maxie?
Claudia: How's your father?
Sonny: Healing. How's Ric?
Claudia: Do the guards have orders to report to you every time I have a visitor?
Sonny: Max and Milo are responsible for my security. They know I don't trust Ric.
Claudia: You should hear what he has to say about you.
Sonny: He's mouthing off?
Claudia: It doesn't matter. You know what I realized? You and I are alike in certain ways, especially when it comes to people telling us what to do. I can't tolerate being told what to do or how to behave.
Sonny: So you're not going to be the obedient wife?
Claudia: Yeah, no chance in hell about that. But I do agree that we'll do better if we're on the same side.
Sonny: Yeah, yeah, it's just not going to be easy.
Claudia: Well, someone has to make the first move.
Spinelli: Greetings. Stone Cold will be overjoyed to hear that Maximista has secured a place of residence. It's not an ideal space, as it is occupied by the original blonde one and the mob prince --
Jason: I can't hear about Maxie right now. I need information on the Russian syndicate.
Spinelli: What is the nature of this information?
Jason: I need to know how they get their money and their manpower into this country, what are their resources, and where the new base of operation is. So start with the active accounts and start working your way backwards.
Spinelli: Um, I already have a file on Karpov with some useful information.
Jason: Okay, good, start consolidating that file.
Spinelli: Okay.
Jason: Is there any more empty apartments where Maxie lives?
Spinelli: I doubt it, as it is a desirable building, but why would Stone Cold inquire?
Jason: Just might be time for you to move out.
Spinelli: The Jackal could not possibly abandon Stone Cold to the forces of evil, unless Stone Cold finds the Jackal to be a burdensome or undesirable roommate --
Jason: I don't want you to get hurt because of me.
Spinelli: If this is an expression of your affection and respect for the Jackal, my affection is returned in multiple -- in terms of danger, the only danger the Jackal finds himself in is when he goes rogue. It is of my own doing, not yours.
[Door shuts]
[Cell phone rings]
Sasha: This is Sasha. We're on our way to the rendezvous now. It may not be as easy as you think to eliminate Jason Morgan.
Jan 11, 2009 03:28
Sasha: Ilya. I got a call from Moscow today. They are not happy.
Ilya: Morgan arrived early.
Sasha: They are not interested in excuses. They want results. No matter what, Jason Morgan has to die.
Spinelli: I cannot abandon my master in his time of need.
Jason: You can still work for me if you don't live here.
Spinelli: Yeah, but if I'm to provide the highest quality of tech support, I should and will remain on the premises. I trust your interview with the law-abiding ones went by without any undue stress.
Jason: The agent closed the case.
Spinelli: No doubt fair Samantha described the daring rescue of young Jake while you remained customarily silent.
Jason: No, Diane wanted me to cooperate.
Spinelli: So you actually conversed with the minions of law enforcement?
Jason: There's no way to hide what happened. Those men took Jake hostage. I killed them trying to rescue Jake.
Spinelli: Clearly, the agent agreed that you and fair Samantha joined forces to save an innocent child and therefore were acting in -- well, it's not exactly self-def -- I shall research the term.
Jason: No, no, no, stop. I don't want you -- I don't want you to research anything, okay? I need information on the Russians.
Spinelli: Perhaps Stone Cold need not battle the Slavic scoundrels on his own. Well, you know, since Mr. Sir now controls the firepower of the formidable Zacchara clan, might it not be an opportune moment to rejoin forces with your former friend and reconcile?
Jason: You -- you want me to go to Sonny for help?
Claudia: Okay, wait. The last time we kissed, you barely tolerated it. In fact, I got the feeling you'd rather be having a root canal. Now you're kissing me. Why?
Sonny: Why do you think?
Sasha: We're changing strategies. No more hostages. I refuse. We've attracted far too much attention from law enforcement.
Ilya: The locals will still be a problem.
Sasha: Well, then we'll solve it.
Alexis: Gentlemen, Ms. Donev, fortuitous I should run into you. It saves me the trouble of a subpoena.
Sasha: It's dangerous here at night. What are you doing out running around?
Alexis: I was going to ask you the very same thing. Actually, I have quite a few questions for you.
Sasha: Well, I'm afraid now is not a good time.
Alexis: Oh, well, all right. A subpoena it is.
Sasha: In connection with what?
Alexis: You're being characterized as a person of interest, which covers a lot of area these days. Basically, because of the carnage left at the roadhouse, murder, conspiracy, that sort of thing. So you can have this discussion with me here or we can have it at the office. It is entirely your choice.
Lucky: Sam, I picked up dessert.
Lucky: Sam?
Lucky: So much for dinner.
Lulu: Since when did you become so obsessed with my sex life?
Maxie: Like I care what you and Johnny do in bed.
Johnny: Yeah, you seem like you care right now.
Maxie: Yes, Johnny, you are a hot guy, but I know lots of hot guys. And here's what I really care about -- my job. I'm pretty sure you don't understand that because you've never had one before, but I also care about getting this apartment into a decent place to live and not hearing my roommate and her boyfriend banging their brains out 24/7.
Lulu: Time out. You have not heard anything. So far, you've paid attention. Now you've jumped to the wrong conclusion.
Maxie: I really hope letting you share this apartment with me doesn't turn out --
Lulu: What do you mean letting me share this apartment with you?
Maxie: Well, I was here first.
Lulu: By, like, two seconds. My name is on the lease, too.
Maxie: Only because you were desperate for a place to live and we're friends, kind of.
Lulu: Well, obviously, friends don't always make the best roommates.
Maxie: Clearly, so if you'd like to leave, like, immediately, no harm, no foul.
Lulu: I am not going anywhere. You need a roommate as badly as I do.
Maxie: Not really, I mean, I make more as a first assistant than you do as a second. And I didn't miss weeks and weeks of work because I had a mental breakdown.
Lulu: Okay, no, no, no, that does not give you the right to dictate what I do with my boyfriend in my bedroom.
Maxie: It does if I can hear every little thing you guys are doing.
Lulu: Invest in some earplugs.
Maxie: I shouldn't have to block out noise in my own apartment.
Lulu: You're not understanding the fact that he's my boyfriend --
Maxie: Spinelli was right. We have to make rules for this apartment immediately.
[Lulu scoffs]
Jason: I won't ask for Sonny's help.
Spinelli: I'm sorry, I beg for enlightenment. Is this current impasse the result of personal animosity or mob politics?
Jason: Okay, the first thing that Sonny taught me was stay detached. Thinking with your emotions makes you stupid and stupid gets you and everybody around you killed. See, the problem is, when Kate got shot, Sonny was so focused on revenge, he didn't even stop to consider the consequences.
Spinelli: Mr. Sir assumed that the Russian shell casing found at the scene of the crime was proof of Karpov's guilt.
Jason: Okay, that's -- maybe, okay? But Sonny should've assessed how much money the Russians already put into Port Charles and how hard they're going to strike back if Sonny takes out the man they put in charge. But he acted without thinking. So when retaliation came, it was aimed directly at Sonny's power base.
Spinelli: Which now belongs to Stone Cold.
Jason: Right. Now, look, the Russians did exact opposite of Sonny. They were actually methodical. They focused on -- on the person who would be Sonny's strongest ally, which was me. They burn my offices. They target my people. And they went after my family. Now, I don't -- I don't think for a second that when Sonny pulled that trigger on Karpov he knew Jake would be taken hostage, but he should've.
Claudia: Okay, well, let's look at the obvious. You didn't kiss me because you were suddenly overwhelmed with tender feelings. Maybe you might like me a little bit more than you used to, but I kind of doubt it.
Sonny: Why do you always have to over-analyze everything?
Claudia: I've never been married before. It's making me introspective and -- and something changed, and it wasn't me. So maybe you're trying to solidify your relationship to the Zaccharas by strengthening our marriage or -- or maybe you don't feel compelled to be faithful to your former love anymore?
Sonny: I thought we agreed that you weren't going to disrespect Kate.
Claudia: No, I mean this with all the respect that she deserves. Maybe you had it in your mind that you married me for business and that you would someday, somehow, go back to Kate, but maybe you've changed your mind.
Sonny: No, maybe you're reading into the kiss more than you should.
Claudia: Oh, okay. So let's explore the other options. You need the Zaccharas.
Sonny: Yes.
Claudia: The Russians made a move against Jason and now you think they're coming after you or... you know that Jason's vulnerable and you're getting ready to make your own move against him.
Sonny: Why would I move against Jason? He's my oldest friend.
Claudia: You don't believe that and neither does he.
Sonny: Oh, now you're going to tell me about my relationship with Jason?
Claudia: Jason was your protégé, right?
Claudia: You taught him everything he knows. And he repaid you by taking away the business you helped him learn to run.
Sonny: He didn't really just take it away. I -- I asked him to.
Claudia: Yeah, but if it was that clean and simple, why didn't he hand it over when you wanted it back?
Sonny: I don't know. I guess we -- we -- we just had a difference of opinion.
Claudia: Okay, but look, this very complicated situation goes wrong, I could end up dead. I think the least I deserve is to know what went wrong between you and Jason.
Sonny: It's no secret. Jason helped Carly take my sons away from me.
[Door opens]
Lucky: Dad?
Luke: Oh, it's you. I thought it was Tracy here to save me from myself.
Lucky: Do I want to know?
Luke: Probably not. It involves the Dominican Republic, tropical drinks, a monsoon, and quickie divorces.
Lucky: You got a divorce?
Luke: No, no, no. Tracy thinks that I think she did, but she didn't, so I'm supposed to be on the bender to end all benders in order to win her back.
Lucky: I see.
Luke: So, what's up with you? What's in the box?
Lucky: Cannoli.
Luke: You shouldn't have, pal.
Luke: No, I didn't. They're dessert for me and Sam, except she stood me up.
Luke: I'm sorry.
Sasha: If I choose to answer your questions, nothing I say will be admissible in court. You know that.
Alexis: Good point. So let's call this a preliminary interview. You're actively promoting the establishment of a Russian criminal syndicate right here in Port Charles.
Sasha: My client was tragically murdered. I'm simply looking out for his business interests.
Alexis: What kind of business are you talking about?
Sasha: It's all a matter of public record, but I'd be happy to show you the paperwork.
Alexis: What dummy corporation owns the roadhouse?
Sasha: Why do you ask?
Alexis: It blew up. I think you know that. With a little boy inside. I think you know that, too.
Sasha: I didn't at the time.
Alexis: So the name Jake Spencer means nothing to you?
Sasha: His mother confronted me in the hospital. I decided not to engage out of respect for her grief. But I hear that her child survived. Please, send my regards to his mother.
Alexis: You need to ask your colleagues to give me some room.
Sasha: It was your idea to ask questions in a dangerous part of town, Ms. Davis. My associates are simply doing their job.
Alexis: I understand that you're not from this country, so let me explain. It is frowned up to threaten a district attorney here in America.
Sasha: You're in a difficult position as district attorney, aren't you? But, lawyer to lawyer, certainly woman to woman, I understand why you're harassing me. You are desperately trying to deflect attention from your lover, who has disappeared, and your daughter, who, most unfortunately, has not.
Spinelli: If I may ask, what are your current intentions vis-Ã -vis Mr. Sir?
Jason: Sonny knows that I'm distracted by the Russians. It would be a good time for him to move in on my territory.
Spinelli: Mr. Sir is the cause of your current troubles with the Slavic scoundrels. It -- it would be dishonorable, not to mention unfair, to take advantage of said troubles to further his own ends.
Jason: Something else Sonny taught me, take advantage of weakness when you get the chance.
Spinelli: Do you believe Mr. Sir would do that to you?
Jason: Ten months ago, I wouldn't have believed Sonny would have joined the Zaccharas. But 10 months ago, Michael wasn't in a coma. And that's -- that's where this all started. I mean, Sonny has not been thinking clearly since.
Spinelli: Do you think he's unhinged by grief?
Jason: I think that Sonny started lying to himself. And I have no room to criticize because I did the exact same thing. I told Sonny, people who do what we do, they don't get to have a happy life. And I started planning a life with Elizabeth and Jake. I had to watch an explosion nearly kill my son for me to see the truth. Sonny is still lying. And I have no idea what I'm going to do if he makes a move against me.
Agent Rayner: Mr. Morgan, I need a few minutes of your time.
Jason: I'm in the middle of a meeting.
Agent Rayner: Well, I could call you down for another interview, but that would be a waste of time.
Jason: Finish up on that research.
Spinelli: A thousand apologies, over-empowered government flunkie.
Jason: Do I need to call my attorney?
Agent Rayner: No, hear me out first. What I have to say could save your life.
Sasha: It's common knowledge that Sam McCall is your daughter. And you were less than discreet in your affair with Jerry Jacks.
Alexis: Again, you need to tell your friends here that they need to give me some room.
Sasha: It must've been incredibly awkward for you when Jerry's boat exploded in the harbor. How did you explain all the cash and drugs?
Alexis: We have reason to believe the drugs came from Karpov.
Sasha: Well, then Jerry must have been transporting them.
Alexis: I would imagine you know all about that. You might even be responsible for his death.
Sasha: Anybody could've killed Jerry Jacks, including your daughter. You know, come to think of it, wasn't she arrested for possession of stolen pharmaceuticals? And weren't they found in her home?
Alexis: No need to worry about that. The charges were dropped.
Sasha: Yeah, I'm not surprised. Family is family. But it must be incredibly inconvenient for you to have a drug-smuggling slut for a daughter.
Alexis: Apparently you didn't hear me. You tell your thugs to back the hell off or I push the button releasing the text directly to the police department telling them where you're located at this minute. It's your choice. They'll be here in two minutes.
Lucky: Sam decided to run her own investigation to catch Jerry. And anyway, I'll just skip the details, but she found herself on the boat with him.
Luke: Was that her choice or his?
Lucky: His, I think. But Jason, he found her just in time and got Sam out.
Luke: That's better than the alternative.
Lucky: Yeah, but Sam -- she -- you know what? When she gets in her mind anything that happens to be dangerous, you know, she just -- she can't stop. It's like she doesn't have any brakes.
Luke: I understand that.
Lucky: I'm not sure I do.
Luke: Cowboy, you should know by now that just because you love somebody, it doesn't mean that your lives will fit together.
Claudia: You know, not to side with your ex-wife, but I can kind of see, considering everything, why Carly wouldn't want you around her children.
Sonny: Absolutely, which is why I tried to do the right thing, getting out of the mob, going legit. But I still couldn't see my kids. Anyway, I'm going to have to live for the rest of my life with the guilt of what happened with Michael. But, you know, I got to tell you, one thing I learned is I'll never -- I'll never see my kids again without guards and making sure that the situation is safe.
Claudia: Yeah, but maybe there's some way that you can petition the court to get some kind of custody.
Sonny: There's no point. I -- I -- I voluntarily renounced custody.
Claudia: You just said that Jason helped Carly take your children away.
Sonny: I wanted to get out of the business. Jason wouldn't agree to take over unless I signed away all my parental rights to Carly.
Claudia: So she -- he sided with her.
Sonny: Yeah, he did. You know, I used to -- you know, when I first met Carly, I hated her and I used to tell Jason to stay away from her. They became friends and then something changed. Well, I guess what changed was I -- I married Carly. He was my best friend and we were like family.
Claudia: Let me guess. You walked in one night and caught them banging each other's brains out?
Sonny: No, worse. They took away my sons.
Claudia: Wow.
Sonny: You know, Jason -- I got to tell you. You know, he was always -- I always felt he would be loyal to me to the end, that I would -- I would trust -- I could trust him with my life. He knew how much my sons meant to me. He could've talked Carly down. He could've found a compromise, but he -- he backed her all the way.
Claudia: Wow. I have to say, I had it completely wrong.
Sonny: I'm sure that's not the first time.
Claudia: You trusted Carly and Jason. They betrayed you. So you pinned all your hopes on Kate Howard and that didn't work out. And now you're stuck married to me. You want our marriage to work out because the Zaccharas are all you've got left.
Milo: Anthony Zacchara to see you.
Claudia: Hi, Daddy.
Sonny: Can you just call -- you know, next time you come?
Anthony: Claudia, leave. Your husband and I have business to discuss.
Sonny: Okay, now, she's my wife now, so you're going to have to just respect her a little more than that, okay?
Anthony: Look, I'm not challenging your authority, see? I'm not trying to take over, but all hell is breaking loose out there, and I damn well expect to know what you're planning to do about it. How are you going to play this Russian nonsense to the Zaccharas' advantage?
Sonny: It's very simple, Anthony. I have a strategy, a very good one.
Anthony: I'm not discussing strategy with Claudia in the room.
Sonny: Then you're going to have to leave because -- and I'll just go ahead and talk it over with my wife.
Anthony: Fine. Who am I to come between the newlyweds?
Sonny: Okay, Anthony, this is the way it's going to work. While Jason's distracted, I'm going to move through his territory because I know all the piers and everything like that, how to offload shipments where, to, and the whole thing.
Anthony: You think he's not going to notice?
Sonny: Jason doesn't want to have anything to do with me. So, hey, Jason doesn't have the resources to fight me and the Russians at the same time.
Agent Rayner: We have extensive files on you, Mr. Morgan. Until the age of 20, you were Jason Morgan Quartermaine, socially prominent, involved in your community, straight "A" student bound for med school, destined to become a pillar of your community.
Jason: I don't need the FBI to tell me who I am.
Agent Rayner: There was a car accident. You sustained brain damage. There's strong evidence to believe that you were mentally incompetent when you went to work for Michael "Sonny" Corinthos, Jr., that he led you into a life of organized crime when you were incapable of realizing what that really meant.
Jason: Is that what you're doing -- you're offering me the chance to plead mental incompetence?
Agent Rayner: Since you've met Sonny, you've been arrested more than 30 times. You've been tried twice for murder. Now you've taken over the Corinthos organization. It's only a matter of time before you get caught or you get killed.
Jason: I still haven't heard what you want.
Agent Rayner: The FBI is prepared to offer you immunity from prosecution.
Jason: In exchange for what?
Maxie: If we're going to be sharing this apartment together, we need to write down some rules.
Lulu: You boss me around at work. You don't boss me around here. I stay out of your way. You stay out of mine.
Maxie: Test question. I leave Chinese food in the fridge. You come home late one night, and you're starving. Do you eat it?
Lulu: Yes, but I pay you back.
Maxie: Wrong answer. Rule one, assign shelves in the refrigerator.
Lulu: Fine.
Maxie: Next question. You're late for work, as usual. You have nothing to wear. Do you go through my closet?
Lulu: I would never do that.
Maxie: Good answer. What if we have a big event to go to and you want to wear one of my samples?
Lulu: Maxie, I would not be caught dead in your clothes.
Maxie: That's a great answer, because you are never ever ever allowed to wear my clothes for any reason whatsoever. In fact, that's probably more important than the food, so rule one will be don't wear my clothes. Rule two, do not steal my food. Rule three, if Johnny's going to be living here, he's going to have to pay a third of the rent.
Luke: For a long time, your mother was happy following me wherever I had to go, with you in tow. Wherever the wind blew us. She was content living under the radar, out on the road.
Lucky: Dad, we all liked it.
Luke: Yeah, well, for the dubious pleasure of being with me, she lived a life that didn't really make her happy, and then when we were all almost killed in Canada, she just decided it was time for her to settle down for good.
Lucky: That's when we all moved to Port Charles.
Luke: Right. Then I tried, cowboy. I really tried. I figured I owed her that much. But I hated being in that house. I still don't like to sleep in the same bed every night. So while your mother was happier than she'd ever been -- me, not so much.
Lucky: Do you think that's what's happening with me and Sam?
Luke: Well, I don't know. I mean, Sam likes living on the edge, and you don't. Maybe it's because of the way you were raised, all the chaos, but you like stability and you like order, and you like that old house. In fact, I think you love it as much as your mother did. What about Sam? Does she love that old house?
Lucky: Sam likes her hot tub.
Luke: Well, you can't blame her for that.
Lucky: We spend most of our time at her house, now that I think about it.
Luke: And what does that tell you? Look, you don't like her working outside the law, and that's where she's most comfortable. I just -- for some reason I just can't see Sam McCall in that old house, living with a cop with a bunch of stepkids. I'm sorry.
Lucky: Okay, we're not there yet.
Luke: Look, cowboy, I think the question here is what do you want?
Lucky: I thought I knew. Now I'm just not sure.
Luke: Well, then it must be time for a heart-to-heart with Samantha. Believe me -- be honest with her now. Save yourself a hell of a lot of trouble later.
Jan 11, 2009 03:30
Alexis: When I find the evidence, and I will, I will prosecute you.
Sasha: No one appreciates a threat, as you well know.
Alexis: I understand that you're afraid. Your syndicate has left you alone here in Port Charles, stranded, and you're afraid for your life, or you'd be gone by now.
Sasha: That's absurd.
Alexis: My strong advice to you is to leave town and take your little friends with you or be ready to go to prison.
Sonny: Jason considers the Zaccharas a lesser part of the two evils, so he's going to leave us alone. By the time he figures out what's going on, a substantial part of his territory will be mine.
Anthony: You mean ours.
Sonny: No, I mean not Jason's.
[Anthony laughs]
Milo: I'm sorry to disturb you, boss, but you have a call that can't wait.
Sonny: Can you -- you'll excuse me?
Anthony: He's taking a call while I'm here. That's a nice touch. He's putting me in my place.
Claudia: Can you blame him?
Anthony: I don't. In fact, I'm impressed. Sonny knows all of Jason's blind spots, and aside from letting you stay in the room, he seems pretty sure about what he's doing.
Claudia: Not that I expect you to tell me what your real plan is, but it does seem to be working out rather nice for you so far.
Anthony: You have no idea.
[Anthony chuckles]
Agent Rayner: You're in a unique position to provide the FBI with information. I wouldn't ask you to testify. That would be like signing your death warrant. We need information -- dates, descriptions of shipments, shipping routes, anything that would lead us to the money trail. Give us the evidence we need to build a case against Sonny Corinthos and Anthony Zacchara.
Jason: Who says I have it? I've never dealt with Anthony Zacchara, and you guys should know I barely speak to Sonny anymore.
Agent Rayner: Anthony Zacchara and Sonny Corinthos have criminal histories far worse than yours. We want them. If you give them to us, you get a blank slate, and should you choose to continue your current activities, I'm not saying we'll look the other way, but you will be very low on our list of priorities. You made a bad choice a long time ago when you didn't know any better. Now is the chance to make a better choice. After all, what do you really owe Sonny Corinthos anyway?
Jason: So you're asking me to give up Sonny to save myself?
Luke: You look like you could use this.
Alexis: Where do I start?
Luke: Start anywhere you like, Natasha. I'm in classic bartender mode. I'm just killing time till my wife decides she needs to talk to me.
Alexis: Nikolas told me about Laura. That's good. He also told me that Tracy's not taking it very well.
Luke: Well, Tracy's not concerned about Laura's health. She's just pissed off at me.
Alexis: Now why would anyone ever be pissed off at you?
Luke: Life changes things, you know. I've changed. Tracy's changed. Laura's in France, and I stayed here. Now, that seems to me that it is self-explanatory, but apparently not to Tracy.
Alexis: Maybe Tracy just wants to believe that you love her the most, that if it came down to you making a choice that you would choose her.
Luke: How'd you know that?
Alexis: Because I watch "Oprah."
[Luke laughs]
Alexis: Isn't it what everybody wants anyway, to be the winner and not the runner-up?
Luke: Believe me, my wife is nobody's runner-up.
Alexis: True. All right, maybe I'm just projecting. I mean, after all, I have three children with three different fathers, and I don't think I've been the love of any of their lives. I don't think I've ever kissed a boy without it turning into an unmitigated disaster.
Luke: Is it just me, or is this whole conversation now kind of turning towards Jerry Jacks?
Lulu: You already said it was fine with you for Johnny to be here.
Maxie: It is, as long as he pays his way.
Lulu: He's my guest in my room.
Maxie: But if I'm going to have to listen to every little thing --
Johnny: She's got a point.
Maxie: See?
Lulu: Whoa, no, no, no, no, wait. You already agreed on this, and you said nothing about money before.
Maxie: Are you planning on taking showers here?
Johnny: Probably.
Maxie: Are you going to use our refrigerator?
Johnny: Yeah.
Maxie: Are you going to use this portion of the apartment where our couch is and our future television?
Johnny: Okay, look, I got no problem kicking in for rent until I find my own place.
Maxie: Fine, thanks.
Lulu: No, forget it. Johnny is my guest, and he has nothing to do with rent anyway. You didn't even think about this until you thought you heard us having sex and you got jealous.
Maxie: If I'm going to have to put up with the mob prince and the drama princess, I don't think it's unreasonable to expect Johnny to pay his portion.
Lulu: The only drama princess here is you, and he is not paying a dime.
Johnny: Okay, why don't we table this discussion for now, and I'll treat us all to some takeout Chinese, huh?
Maxie: You can do whatever you want as long as you're paying rent.
[Door closes]
Agent Rayner: You sure you really understand this offer, Mr. Morgan? You won't have to testify. You won't be prosecuted. All we need is information. Feel free to discuss it with your lawyer, but the deal won't be on the table forever. I suggest you take it while you have the chance.
Jason: Like you said, I need to talk to my attorney.
Agent Rayner: Oh. Well, I'll take that as a no for now. It'll take some time, but eventually you'll realize you'll have to cooperate. It's just a matter of finding the right leverage.
Claudia: Walking daddy to the car. That was a nice touch.
Sonny: Sign of respect.
Claudia: I think it was actually a sign that he can't get there on his own.
Sonny: That, too.
Claudia: Thank you for letting me stay in the room. I know you only did it to annoy my father, but I appreciate it.
Sonny: Well, I like annoying Anthony, and I have no problem with you being in the room, you know, if I'm talking strategy, 'cause I think you need to know what's going on.
Claudia: But you don't trust me?
Sonny: You don't trust me either, but what you need to remember is we're on the same side, right? We're going to, you know -- vice versa. You get what I'm saying?
Claudia: This is so easy it almost feels natural.
Sonny: Is that a problem?
Claudia: It is a problem, because you know as well as I do when something seems too good to be true, it is.
Alexis: I knew Jerry was a liar. He played me, I played him. And the truth is, had I amassed enough evidence to secure a conviction against him, I would have had no trouble turning him over to the feds.
Luke: Really? But I mean, that's just him, right? Just Jerry Jacks? You take a more lenient view of other alleged felons in your acquaintance, right?
Alexis: You mean like you, when you tried to kill my stepmother?
Luke: We.
Alexis: Exactly. This nullifies any case that I could make against you, so you're safe.
Luke: Oh, good, well, I'm glad to hear that. Now, back to you and the sociopath.
Alexis: Suffice it to say it didn't end well.
Luke: So what, you were just having too much fun to care?
Alexis: I'm not going to lie to you. I did enjoy his company. He was witty, charming, spoke several languages, well-traveled.
Luke: He was a saint.
Alexis: Very well-read. And now he's dead. Apparently didn't read the manual on how to blow up a freighter, since when he tried to blow up the freighter, he neglected to jump the ship before the bomb went off.
[Luke chuckles]
Luke: Well, that's a real kick in the teeth.
Alexis: Speaking of which... I'm not a fan of Tracy's. Truly, I think that she's vindictive and spiteful and a harpy on a good day. But she must love you very much to put up with all that you do, and to know that you still love Laura must be a real kick in the teeth for her.
Sonny: What do you mean, "Too good to be true"? I made you lunch. We enjoyed it. We had conversation, and I let you stay in the room while I did business.
Claudia: You only married me because you got backed into a corner.
Sonny: Yeah, I made a choice. We both did. It's just no reason to be unpleasant.
Claudia: Well, you seemed to really get a kick out of being unpleasant to me in the past. I mean, you went out of your way to treat me like a whore, and now you're treating me like a human, and it's just a little unsettling.
Sonny: What did you think it was going to be like being married to me?
Claudia: Not this.
Sonny: What did you think? I was going to yell at you all the time and treat you miserable and never stop?
Claudia: I don't know. I've known men who would do all those things.
Sonny: Well, I'm not one of those men. As a matter of fact, you know, I just... I'm not proud of the way I treated you, and it's just that I was -- I had a lot going on, and I was angry, and I took it out on you.
Claudia: Well, I wasn't exactly little miss sunshine either.
Sonny: Yeah, you know what? We got into this marriage for reasons only pretty much both of us know, and you know -- look, we're in it. If one thing happens from one second to the next, then we just have to go with it. I mean, I don't have a problem with that, do you?
Claudia: No, it's just -- it's a surprise, that's all, and I hate surprises.
Sonny: Yeah, yeah, so do I, but you know what? Maybe this one's going to turn out okay. Bad, bad time to interrupt.
Milo: Sorry, boss. I was just dropping off Ms. Zacchara's -- that is, Mrs. C's mail. You've asked me to pick it up from your old place, and --
Sonny: Okay, drop it right there, okay, then just go.
Claudia: Come on. Why are you so hard on the guy? I asked him to bring me my mail.
Sonny: Yeah, but I just hate to be interrupted.
Claudia: Well, maybe Milo just did us both a favor. Who is this from? I wonder who sent me this.
Sonny: You know what? Forget about the mail. Just answer the question.
Claudia: Was there a question?
Sonny: Yeah, what can we do... to make this marriage work for both of us?
Johnny: Maybe Maxie left.
Lulu: With a free dinner on the way? I doubt it.
[Muffled laughter]
Lulu: I don't believe it.
Johnny: Do you think she's having sex?
Lulu: Um, isn't it obvious? I bet she's having sex with Spinelli to prove a point to me. I'm going to kill her.
Maxie: Oh, yes, yes!
Johnny: I don't hear him complaining.
Lulu: Yeah, because he's madly in love with her. Oh, my gosh, I can't believe she would be so mean. How could she do this? She's just using him. He would do anything.
Spinelli: Greetings. The Jackal arrives bearing a gift to bring good fortune into the blonde one's new --
Lulu: Wait, uh... if you're out here, who's in there?
Maxie: Don't stop! Don't stop! Yes, yes, yes!
Sasha: Get teams to Pier 23 immediately. We have to get this shipment landed before Jason Morgan interferes.
Sam: Hi, it's Sam. You know the drill. I'll call you back. Thanks.
Lucky: Well, I guess you decided to skip dinner, so next time let me know.
Sam: Jason, pick up.
[Phone ringing]
Jan 11, 2009 03:31
Lulu: What are you doing here?
Spinelli: Was I not expected?
Lulu: Then, who --
Spinelli: I sense an unsettling undercurrent. Did I commit some sort of faux-pas that I was unaware of?
Lulu: We thought that you were here -- in there, with Maxie.
Maxie: Oh, yes. Ah, a little harder. Oh!
[Maxie giggles]
Spinelli: The picture is becoming alarmingly clear. Since I am undoubtedly here, in the living room, then Maximista is in her bedroom... having carnal knowledge of... who?
Sam: Come on.
Jason: Yeah? Hello?
Sasha: You're a constant thorn in my side, Ms. McCall. It's time to extract you.
Diane: I want you to tell me every word that FBI agent -- uh, what's his name? What's his name?
Jason: Rayner.
Diane: Rayner. What did agent Rayner say?
Jason: How about we just jump to the important part?
Diane: Okay.
Jason: I can have blanket immunity if I give up Sonny.
Claudia: We shared a couple of meals. We had a couple of kisses. I mean, I think our marriage of convenience is going fine. Can I have my mail now?
Sonny: Not until I convince you that I want this partnership to be real. How do I do that?
Claudia: Well, if "real" to you means sex, then, you know, to be honest with you, I don't really want to go to bed with you one night and then wake up the next day and realize you were using me.
Luke: Mr. Jacks. What brings you to the struggling side of town?
Jax: I heard you were re-opening the Haunted Star. I guess I was misinformed.
Luke: Well, don't go away angry. I'm sure I can accommodate you. You are my favorite customer.
Jax: Really? Would that be because of my charm or my bottomless bank account?
Luke: Your cash flow run amok certainly goes a long way in the direction of --
Jax: I'm sure it does. I actually miss this place.
Luke: We do provide a public service, don't we?
Jax: Yes, we certainly do. If you need some help, you know, getting the place up and running, you let me know.
Luke: I will. I may be ready to talk to you about that soon, actually. But not at the moment. Right now, I'm a little involved, dealing with my extremely pissed off wife.
Jax: I'm sorry, I don't follow.
Luke: Well, it's a long, gruesome story. But, basically, I'm trying to convince Tracy that I'm suicidal.
Jax: Oh.
Luke: It's all part of getting her back.
Jax: By tricking her?
Luke: Right.
Jax: But it's really an act of love. Even though you're lying like a rug, you're doing it out of the goodness of your heart.
Luke: Super. Succinct. Summing up.
Jax: That must be a Spencer thing, because you sound like Carly.
Maxie: Yes! Yes! Oh, don't stop. Yes! Oh.
Spinelli: The Jackal had not realized that -- uh, the relationship I enjoy with Maximista is of a most platonic nature. Still, I --
Lulu: This is beyond outrageous. You guys know what she's doing, right? I mean, she's trying to prove a point. Namely, that if Johnny and I can have sex on the other side of a thin wall, so can she. But, who she's with, I mean, who knows? It could be some model, Federico, or some homeless guy she pulled off the street.
Maxie: Oh!
Spinelli: This is far too painful for me. I'm just going to go.
Lulu: No, no, no. No, you are not going anywhere. Maxie is being bitchy and mean and she's going to face the consequences. Come on.
Maxie: Yes! Yes! Oh! Woo! Oh, yes! Oh! That's good! Oh, yes.
Spinelli: Maximista?
Lulu: Maxie.
Maxie: Ah -- huh?
Lulu: Having fun with yourself?
Claudia: I know why you kissed me before. It was a manipulation.
Sonny: Oh. Is kissing off limits?
Claudia: Not necessarily. I like kissing you, but it's not going to get you what you want.
Sonny: Well, see, this is good, talking about stuff. You know, making our, you know, positions clear and all that thing, because I -- I -- I want to be considerate. I want us to get along on a day-to-day basis so we can, you know, grow in our partnership. But I'm not going to lie to you. I haven't automatically grown feelings for you because we've been married a couple of days. I mean, it is a complicated relationship and we didn't start out well.
Claudia: That's an understatement.
Sonny: But, I've got to tell you, there's some progress because I don't hate you with a passion anymore and I want to break down those walls so I can get to know you. But that's as far as it goes at the moment.
Claudia: That's pretty far.
Sonny: Okay.
Claudia: And I have to say that I'm grateful, but, I mean, you're going to have to give me some time to not see this as some kind of trap.
Sonny: Oh, yeah, I get that.
Claudia: Do you? I mean, do you understand?
Sonny: Yeah, I understand.
Claudia: Because the main reason that I was so opposed to marrying you in the first place is that I hate the idea of being bonded for life to somebody who despises me. I mean, if I wanted to be treated like a joke and a whore, I could have stayed at home with my father.
Sonny: No, no, my intention is to treat you... as an equal.
Claudia: Well, I like the goal. But you are going to have to be patient with me. I can't just out of the box believe that you're sincere.
Diane: It's no happy accident that Agent Rayner came to you alone and off the record. It gives him deniability. It's your word against his that the meeting ever took place. Let's be realistic. Who are the authorities going to believe, a clean-cut government civil servant or you? Look, I have no doubt that it was a legitimate reaching out. The feds want your cooperation, which means you have landed in a rather unique position, Jason. Blanket immunity?
Jason: Across the board, yeah.
[Diane chuckles]
Diane: Well, that's quite an offer, considering the laundry list of crimes you've put your stamp on.
Jason: And all I have to do in exchange is provide information on Sonny and the Zaccharas.
Diane: An argument exists that it's the right thing to do.
Jason: Not where I live.
Diane: Okay, Jason, just -- just consider it. You give the feds the information they need to bring down Sonny and the Zacchara organization, and then you are free to carry on as usual. And, Jason, that means it's your rules. No more wars. No more bloodshed. No more innocents getting caught in arbitrary lines of fire. Peace finally comes to Port Charles, and it is once again a safe and happy place to raise your children. And isn't that devoutly to be wished?
Sam: You've always struck me as a really smart woman. Why don't you do the right thing? You need to let me go. You've got to get back into your scary black van, head to the Canadian border, get on the first flight to Russia or Switzerland, wherever it is you came from.
Sasha: Why would I take such a convoluted trip if the simpler solution would be just to eliminate you?
Sam: Because if I show up dead, Jason Morgan will retaliate.
Sasha: Oh, you know, I hate to disabuse you of such an obviously fondly held notion, but Jason Morgan is desperately fighting to hold on to his territory. He doesn't have time to waste avenging old girlfriends. Bring her.
Sam: No!
[Muffled yelling]
Luke: So, what's up with you and my lovely niece these days? Still in wedded bliss?
Jax: A lot has happened since you've been gone. Carly and I are getting divorced.
Luke: Well, there's a lot of that going around.
Jax: Perhaps I should blame you.
Luke: Me?
Jax: Well, I imagine you probably can't remember, with all the scams that you've run. I'll be happy do refresh your memory. Carly divorces Alcazar, she gets let out of Shadybrook, and you facilitate her buying into the Metro Court. Remember that?
Luke: Facilitated? No, no, no, I blackmailed her. Jax, that's blood under the bridge. Let it go. You don't strike me as a grudge holder.
Jax: I'm conflicted. I don't know whether to thank you or to hold a grudge. And you bringing Carly back into my orbit was either the worst thing or the best thing that ever happened to me, depends on what day you ask.
Luke: I know that feeling.
Jax: Yes, I imagine you do, being married to Tracy. So, I won't hold a grudge. I'll consider you a fellow casualty in the emotional wars.
Luke: Sounds like you're packing your bags.
Jax: Trying again with Carly is the ultimate bridge to nowhere. It's a waste of time. Life's too short for that.
Olivia: I was hoping to pick up a card game. Looks like you've closed.
Luke: No, I can always re-open for a beautiful woman.
Olivia: Can I get a shovel with that?
Luke: Pick a table at your peril.
Olivia: You think you can take my money?
Luke: There is certainly that possibility.
Olivia: We'll see. You in?
Jax: Sure, why not?
Luke: Well, great. Lambs to the slaughter.
Lulu: Wow, Maxie, that was some performance.
Johnny: I'll say.
Maxie: Thanks, Johnny. What did you think?
Spinelli: Uh --
Lulu: Wow, Maxie, how insensitive are you?
Maxie: Of your delicate sensibilities? Please. I was trying to make a point. It's no fun listening to other people have noisy sex. So you and Johnny better keep it down and I'll do the same. And what about Spinelli?
Spinelli: What?
Lulu: Wow, if you don't know already, then you're more hopeless than I thought. Our dinner is getting cold.
Maxie: Well, it's official. Living with Lulu is going to be a complete disaster. Did you see that dumb look she gave me? "Who, me? Noisy sex?" I mean, please, she wasn't even getting where I was coming from. You know, she used to have practically a whole wing to herself at the Quartermaine house. What a waste. Why are you looking at me like that?
Spinelli: Um, the Jackal could not help but notice the vast difference in Maximista's demeanor from just now compared to how she reacted that memorable occasion when she had biblical knowledge of the Jackal.
Maxie: English, please.
Spinelli: You did not -- you did not take your pleasure so vociferously with me as you did with that wall.
Maxie: Silly. That's because I faked it.
Spinelli: Faked it? With me or the wall?
Claudia: I didn't think that you saw this, us, as a long-term situation. Sony: Why else would I bother?
Claudia: Um, because you could have married me, used the Zacchara resources to go after the Russians and then dumped us all.
Sonny: Good thinking. Why didn't I think of that?
Claudia: Yeah, you probably did. Matter of fact, it might still be your strategy. But I doubt it. I think you're a lot more forward-thinking and forward-looking than I ever gave you any credit for. I mean, for instance, you know the Russians are a temporary problem. They're nothing for you to get upset about. You can leave them to Jason. Let him take care of them while you go after his territory. It's smart. It's very clean.
Sonny: Yeah, I like that. You know, it's amazing that it's like the way you think, it's like the way I think. Not too many women are like that, you know?
Claudia: Yeah, that's because you always go out with the girls that are lesser.
Sonny: Lesser? What does that mean, "lesser"?
Claudia: Lesser, you know, less weak, fragile, the way that you love them.
Sonny: So you think you know me well enough to make that call?
Claudia: I think you're not so hard to read after all.
Sonny: So, what have we resolved here?
Claudia: Well, I think we've resolved a lot.
Sonny: Yeah?
Claudia: Yeah, I mean, if you're serious about being the long-term head of the Zacchara organization, then it makes it a lot easier for me to believe that you're sincere about things working out between us.
Sonny: Great.
Sonny: Uh, business.
Jason: I already took care of Elizabeth and Jake. They don't have to be afraid of their association with me ever again.
Diane: Having removed yourself from their lives again, I see two flaws. "A," you've done it before with no lasting success. B, your absence might not be enough to keep them safe.
Jason: What does that mean?
Diane: It means that anyone with any animosity towards you, Jason, knows about your involvement with Elizabeth. The fact that you're no longer together with her does not equate to you not caring about what happens to her or her children. Did Agent Rayner say you'd have to testify, join witness protection?
Jason: Just information.
Diane: And are you going to give it to him?
Jason: What do you think?
Diane: I think you're unbelievable. I think you're unbelievable. After everything that has happened, you are still willing to ignore what is in your best interest to protect Sonny. When is it enough, Jason?
Jason: Sonny was like a father to me. The least I owe him is my protection. In fact, I think I need to do more.
Lulu: I really hope that Maxie is not breaking poor Spinelli's heart. God, she is so obnoxious. I'm starting to think moving in with her was a very bad idea.
Johnny: I know Maxie pushes your buttons, but she has been a good friend to you. More of one than me, for example.
Lulu: What? How can you say that?
Johnny: When you were locked up in Shadybrook, she was the one who was determined to get you out of there and I was the one who was pressured by those worthless doctors to keep you in there.
Lulu: Look, I really hope that you are not still beating yourself up about this. That was a very confusing time for both of us.
Johnny: I'm just stating the facts.
[Lulu sighs]
Lulu: Fine, yes, you may have a point. Maxie turned out to be a lot deeper than I thought she was and she was there for me at a time when I needed her. But that does not mean that she's going to make a very good roommate.
Johnny: Okay, you're not sharing a room with Maxie. You're sharing one with me.
Lulu: Mm. Maybe we should show her what real loud sex sounds like.
Johnny: Is that a challenge or an invitation?
Lulu: Whatever works.
Spinelli: The Jackal has long suspected that his glorious night of passion with the woman of his dreams was not as equally satisfying for her, both physically and emotionally. But I've been able to --
Maxie: Spinelli, what are you babbling about? Having sex with you was totally wrong. It was probably the most selfish thing I've ever done in my life. I was needy and you were there and I used you, the one person I care about more than anyone else in the world.
Spinelli: The Jackal regrets that Maximista found the experience so regrettable.
Maxie: Only because I used you. But, the sex -- I mean, it's too bad we can't do it again because it was wonderful.
Spinelli: It was?
Maxie: Yeah. I mean, I've never experienced anything like it. You were sweet and sensitive. You made me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.
Spinelli: I'm flattered, but I'm somewhat confused. You weren't nearly as vocal as you feigned just now.
Maxie: Oh, that's nothing to go by. I was just putting on a show for Johnny and Lulu. And I did pretty good, right? I mean, I should be, considering all the times I've acted my way to ecstasy, so to speak.
Spinelli: You mean you actually have faked it with partners in the past?
Maxie: Oh, sure. Which is another reason we won't be having sex again. I just never want to have to fake it with you.
Milo: The boss isn't home.
Claudia: Ah, but his wife is. Hi, Jason. How are you? Come in. Do you want something to drink?
Jason: No, thanks.
Claudia: Okay. You want to sit outside on the terrace? It's really pretty.
Jason: No, right here is just fine. I'll wait right here.
Claudia: Oh, okay. So, congratulations are in order. Feel free to spit those out at any time.
Jason: Congratulations.
Claudia: You know, the "man of few words" crap gets old really fast. I did want to thank you, though, because if I had married you that day when we were on our way to see the Justice of the Peace, I wouldn't have been able to marry Sonny. And, I gotta tell you, I think it might be the smartest move I ever made. Too bad it didn't turn out so well for you, huh?
Luke: And the house shows blackjack. Tough luck. Listen, if I have to call this short, it'll only be because my wife walked in and I'm supposed to be distraught at the moment.
Olivia: Right. I like the way you show it.
Jax: Yeah, Luke is scamming his wife, for the greater good.
Olivia: I see, I see.
Luke: Sonny.
Sonny: Hey.
Luke: Hi.
Sonny: Hey, how you doing?
Luke: Good.
Sonny: A little too soon for you to be out gambling, isn't it?
Olivia: What, are you my father now? I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself.
Sonny: Well, you don't have to get so snippy.
Olivia: I'm not getting snippy. Just stay off my case, okay?
Sonny: Is it my imagination, or did you show up at my door last night looking for secret medical attention?
Olivia: Well, that was then, this is now.
Sonny: That was then, this is -- that -- that logic just hurts my head. You can leave now, Jax, because I've got to speak to Luke.
Jax: Oh, yes, I'd love to. It's probably mob business, you know. I want to get out of here before the bullets start flying, so -- can I take you home?
Olivia: Absolutely.
Luke: Don't forget your money. Stop back any time, open or closed. We never close.
Olivia: I'll take you up on that.
Luke: Well, this better be good. I was about to take Jax for a long, bumpy ride.
[Sonny chuckles]
Sonny: Ah, a lot has happened since you were away.
Luke: Yeah, I hear.
Sonny: And, uh, there's some things you need to know.
Luke: I'm listening.
Sonny: I made an alliance with the Zaccharas. I had to marry Claudia.
Luke: You married Claudia?
Sonny: It's just business.
Luke: Corinthos-Zacchara is a pretty impressive name.
[Sonny laughs]
Sonny: Well, let me tell you, I need that kind of solid base right now. Since John Zacchara bought into the Haunted Star, looks like you and I will be partners again.
Jan 11, 2009 03:32
Johnny: You lean any further into that hallway, you're going to fall sideways on your ass.
Lulu: I swear, if Maxie is having sex with Spinelli right now, I will tear her hair out.
Johnny: Hey, what business is it of yours if Maxie and Spinelli are having sex?
Lulu: Because it's not casual for Spinelli. Spinelli loves Maxie.
Johnny: Okay, I hate to break it to you, but real men do not object to casual sex.
Lulu: Spinelli is different. He's gentle and he's kind and he's easily hurt. And she doesn't even see how gone for her he is. I mean, she's just thinking about what Spinelli can do for her next and how Spinelli is going to get her out of the next mess that she's gotten herself into. It is just so typical of her to be sleeping with Spinelli and not think about how it affects him.
Johnny: Poor Spinelli. You're right, the object of a beautiful woman's sexual affection. My heart bleeds for him.
Lulu: You think Maxie's beautiful?
Johnny: Listen, just because I love you doesn't mean I don't have eyes in my head.
Lulu: I'm not sure that I like that.
Johnny: Okay, I hope you get over that. But hey, listen to me. Even if you are right and Maxie does have evil designs on Spinelli, what can you do about it? Did you listen to anyone when they warned you against me?
Lulu: No.
Johnny: Did the fact that everybody thought I was a walking disaster waiting to happen make you keep your distance?
Johnny: We had to figure it out for ourselves and decide to live with the consequences. Maybe Maxie and Spinelli have to do the same thing.
Maxie: This is wrong. It's all wrong.
Maxie: Well, the furniture, the walls, everything. It's not feng shui-ed enough.
Spinelli: Does that mean that Maximista has taken the Jackal's lessons on the art of interior harmony to heart?
Maxie: Well, I tried to read some of that stuff you gave me, but it was way too technical. And who cares about smelly history, anyway? I need something that's going to help me now. We ran an article about it in "Crimson." That kind of helped. Can we move this?
Spinelli: Yes. Allow me.
Maxie: Okay, bring it over this way.
Maxie: Go slowly, because I don't know where I want it.
Maxie: Wait, faster than that. Come on, come on, come on.
[Both laughing]
Maxie: Shh. Too many sounds like that and Lulu will think we're messing around just to spite her.
Spinelli: Well, if that is Maximista's wish, I am sure I could find it somewhere in myself to accommodate.
Maxie: Spinelli, are you asking me to play a round of mattress tag with you? Well, I would love to. Oh, think about how nuts that would drive Lulu. But even that's not a good enough reason to use you again.
Spinelli: But I feel like I have to correct a false assumption about "being used" as you so frequently say. I -- I never felt that way. In fact, I was and I am so honored that you chose me in your hour of need.
Maxie: Spinelli, that's exactly the kind of unselfish thing I would expect you to say, because you care about me, the real me, who I am inside. I'm not just some potential hookup to you.
Jax: You okay?
Olivia: Yeah, I had a little accident. I'm not quite recovered from it.
Jax: Really? What kind of accident?
Olivia: I slipped in the shower.
Jax: Oh. Something tells me you got sucked into some mob violence, which would explain Sonny's concern.
Olivia: You don't like him, do you?
Jax: That's an understatement.
Olivia: Was that something specific or just a natural aversion?
Jax: Well, let's just say that Sonny and I found ourselves on opposite sides of mutual interests more than once.
Olivia: Yeah, I'll bet.
Jax: That and he's a career criminal who likes to paint himself as the victim, so that women fall for him. Some get hurt, some die.
Olivia: That and you're jealous because Carly still has feelings for him and you want her all to yourself.
Sonny: Kate was shot on our wedding day on the altar, right in front of my face.
Luke: My God, that's awful.
Sonny: Instead of, you know, walking out of the church husband and wife, we went out in an ambulance, blood on my hands. At first I thought it was Karpov who shot her, but it wasn't. Eventually, he stabbed me, put weights on my ankles, and threw me in the water, left me to drown. So, I killed him and the Russian syndicate retaliated.
Luke: All over Jason, from what I hear.
Sonny: Beat up Mike, burned down Kelly's, which whatever it costs, I will pay for all the damages.
Luke: Yeah, well, I appreciate that. My sister really wants to reopen there. Now look, Sonny, you know how I feel about mob politics, being taken care of --
Sonny: I totally, totally understand. Look, I can't speak for Jason, because he chose to do this alone. He doesn't want me back in the organization.
Luke: Because he thinks that's an open door for Zacchara.
Sonny: Anthony gave me total control of the business. I just had to marry Claudia.
Luke: Well, ha ha. I wonder who got the better part of that deal?
Sonny: Well, let me tell you something. I don't love the deal, but it does give me some power, and I just don't want to see anybody else get hurt. And you know what? It gives me access from both sides.
Luke: Right, and it also puts you in a position to find out if the Zaccharas were behind the hit on Kate.
Sonny: You know, it's like -- that's what I've always liked about you. I don't need to explain myself, because you already know the answer.
Luke: You know, conflict with Jason is inevitable at some point.
Sonny: Yeah, look, I just wanted to tell you this in person, because whatever happens with what I'm doing, I just -- I want you to know that you are under no pressure from the Zacchara organization.
Luke: Thanks. That's a relief. I've got problems of my own right now.
Claudia: Well, you've had a couple of bad weeks. Haven't you? I mean, first Sonny kills Karpov and then the Russians come after you and they torch your house and your business and your shipping yards. They go after your girlfriend's kid. By the way, you should know, the entire time that Jake was being held hostage, Sonny completely suspended all business activity, all. He didn't want to take the risk of aggravating the Russians and Jake getting hurt.
Jason: I'd expect nothing less.
Claudia: Well, he'd just taken over my family business. I mean, he was newly in power. So, his compassion could really be interpreted as weakness. He made a big sacrifice for you. It was a big risk.
Jason: I'm grateful.
Claudia: Of course, now he is going to have to step up and take the reins and lead.
Jason: You mean, against me?
Lulu: Oh, sorry. Not to sound so whiny like Maxie, but this couch is just awful. What? What is this?
Johnny: That's a new couch. It's my contribution to the household.
Lulu: Where did you get this?
Johnny: It's the deposit money that Jax refunded for the apartment.
Lulu: So, this is all the money that you have in the world?
Johnny: Yeah, well, there's my car.
Lulu: Oh my gosh, you are so cute. You've never had to economize, have you?
Johnny: Not really, no.
Lulu: Oh, well, in the real world, we usually save the cash that we make, and we don't blow it on couches. We use it for essentials like food and water.
Johnny: Okay, sounds like a good plan. Now all I need is a job.
Lulu: Well, you can look tomorrow.
Johnny: Yeah, I will. For all the good that it'll do.
Lulu: Discouraged already?
Johnny: No, I'm just realistic. Who's going to hire a guy with a high school diploma and the same last name as a feared and loathed mobster?
Lulu: People will see how smart and capable you are, and you'll be just fine.
Johnny: You wouldn't be biased, would you?
Lulu: Who, me?
Maxie: God, you guys, get a room.
Lulu: Oh, we already have one. I wouldn't mind going there. Would you?
Johnny: No.
Maxie: We have a deal.
Lulu: Yeah, Johnny and I did not agree to any deal.
Maxie: Do you want this to turn into a full blown war, because I'm ready.
Spinelli: Actually, you know what? I just forgot I have my housewarming gift.
Maxie: I like presents that look like this. You got us rocks?
Spinelli: It's a Zen garden. It promotes peace and harmony in your new environs. Perhaps we should put it in the most effective space as soon as possible.
Sonny: So, I hear you have news of your own. Laura's awake, fully recovered?
Luke: Well, fully recovered -- that's still iffy, but she is awake. She's in France, and she's being tested and treated.
Sonny: And you're here?
Luke: Yeah, I'm here with my wife who thinks she ought to be my ex-wife.
Sonny: I don't understand. What do you mean?
Luke: Well, Tracy, for reasons that are not worth going into, went to the Dominican Republic to get herself a divorce from me, but she didn't get it. But I'm not supposed to know that she didn't get it. Get it?
Sonny: Well, let me get this straight. You didn't go to France to be with Laura because you wanted to stay with Tracy, and then Tracy divorced you, or didn't, and now what do you want?
Luke: I want to stay married to my wife.
Sonny: Your wife Tracy?
Luke: Tracy is my wife, yes.
Sonny: And Laura?
Luke: Laura is, you know, she has her life. I have mine.
Sonny: It's that easy?
Luke: It's that obvious, pal. You know, you can't live in the past.
Sonny: Right.
Luke: And you can't get back something that you lost a long time ago.
Sonny: You know what? That's good advice. I wish you luck.
Luke: You, too.
Sonny: Anything goes on around here, you know, call me.
Luke: I appreciate that.
Tracy: Is Luke here?
Luke: Wife? Well, you're back to see the final binge? Come closer.
Claudia: I don't know when Sonny's going to be back. It could be hours. Do you want me to have him call you?
Jason: No, it's better if we talk in person.
Claudia: Well, if you're here to make peace, I have to tell you that it's a little bit late. Sonny is the acting head of the Zacchara organization. So, I seriously doubt he's going to stop something that's already in motion because you've decided to make nice.
Jason: So, tell me this, Claudia, do you speak for Sonny now?
Claudia: No, I'm just giving you my input.
Jason: Yeah, your input?
Claudia: My take.
Jason: You went from hating Sonny to having the inside track pretty fast.
Claudia: Well, it turns out we're not natural enemies after all. Let's just say that we are starting to find some common ground.
Sasha: Any last words?
Sam: You're wasting an opportunity. If you want to ambush Jason, use me as bait.
Sasha: You know, we tried that with his girlfriend's kid. You saw how well that worked out. No, my way is cleaner.
Sam: Uhh!
Sasha: Get her!
Maxie: Don't forget to call ahead and make sure that the conference call between Giselle and Warren is set up as soon as Kate walks in the door. Okay, thanks.
Tracy: Look at you. You're pathetic.
Luke: I am what you made me.
Tracy: Do not make me responsible for you.
Luke: We are responsible for each other till death do us part, and that's the part that I'm working on right now.
Tracy: I don't think you should throw your phony marriage vows on the table.
Luke: They weren't phony. I meant every word of them.
Tracy: Tell it to someone who cares.
Luke: That would be you or you wouldn't be here.
Tracy: Actually, I'm here protecting my investment.
Luke: That would be me.
Tracy: I'm going to put you on notice, Luke. If you are too addle-brained to turn this place around and start making a profit, I will hire a real manager who can.
Luke: Do your worst. It doesn't matter anymore. If I'm --
Tracy: Not that old routine again.
Luke: Help -- help. Help.
Tracy: You are so faking.
[Luke groans]
Luke: No -- fake.
Tracy: Ooh. That's pretty good, almost convincing. Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.
Claudia: Maybe I was wrong before. Maybe it's good that you were here making the first move. I mean, if you can find a way to compromise a little bit, it's possible that you and Sonny could find a way to work together, at least stay out of each other's way, right?
Sonny: What are you doing here?
Jason: I thought we should talk, but I don't think there's anything to say.
Sonny: Well, that's your call.
Jason: Claudia told me that you held off going against the Russians while Jake was being held. I appreciate that.
Sonny: I'm glad you got him back.
Claudia: That was weird. That was really weird. He waits all this time and then he comes and he says two words to you and he takes off?
Sonny: Well, that's just -- yeah. Well, look, you know what? Jason knows that he forced me into this position. So I've got no choice. I'm going to have to move into his territory.
Claudia: What are you going to do if he fights you?
[Crash]
[Sam screams]
Jan 11, 2009 03:33
Sonny: So, we're going to unload the shipment at pier five, and --
Max: That's Jason's pier, boss.
Sonny: Yeah, it is, really? I am aware of that.
Claudia: Eight days until Christmas. Do you remember that song? On the eighth day of Christmas
Sonny: No, I don't really pay much attention to that song.
Claudia: Well, I'd sing it for you, but torture's not really my thing. This room looks pretty cheerless.
Sonny: Okay, we're in the middle of talking business. Are you aware of that?
Claudia: Well, I think that a 10-foot tree would fit really nicely in this room. So, where do you want to put it?
Sonny: I don't want a tree this year.
Nadine: Come on in.
Nikolas: So, are you ready to go to the church?
Nadine: Almost. Can you just give me one more minute?
Nikolas: Yeah. Can I help you with anything?
Nadine: Well, I wrote a eulogy, or I wrote half of one and then crossed out most of it, and now I can't find it anywhere.
Nikolas: It's okay. It'll be all right. We'll find it.
Nadine: No, it won't. I'm so worried I'm going to make a mess of things, and totally disappoint Aunt Raylene.
Nikolas: Hey, it's okay. I'll get you through this. I promise.
Maxie: I couldn't agree with you more, Kate. The silver crystals are cold. Something warmer, I'll work on it. Have you found a job yet?
Johnny: If I had, I'd be working.
Maxie: No offense, but the sooner you move out, the better. I think after what happened last night --
Lulu: What happened last night?
[Luke whistles]
Luke: I'm sorry, but you've got to help me. It's a dire emergency.
Epiphany: I can't wait to hear this.
Luke: You have to admit me as a heart patient.
Robin: Patrick?
Patrick: What? Is Emma okay?
Robin: Do you hear that?
Patrick: Hear what?
Robin: Emma's not crying.
Patrick: Wow, we fed her like four hours ago. She's been sleeping for four or five hours.
Robin: Pretty soon she'll be able to sleep through the entire night.
Patrick: Don't jinx it. Let's just enjoy the moment.
Robin: She's not too quiet, right?
Patrick: We put her on her back all the time. The chance of SIDS is miniscule.
Robin: Okay, yeah, I'm sure she's fine.
Patrick: Is she breathing?
Robin: I can't tell. Yeah, she's fine.
Patrick: Okay, just let her sleep. Come on.
Robin: If Emma starts sleeping four and five hours a day, I don't know what I'm going to do with myself.
Patrick: I have an idea. Come here, sexy mama.
Robin: You look really cute when you're all tousled.
[Emma crying]
Nadine: It's so hard to write --
Nikolas: Come on.
Nadine: I tried to think of anecdotes that would do Aunt Raylene justice and stories and memories we shared together.
Nikolas: I know. Well, that sounds perfect. That's what you should do.
Nadine: Yeah, until I stood in front of the mirror to try and rehearse it and I couldn't get through the first line without crying.
Nikolas: Listen, Nadine, what little time I spent with Raylene, it was clear to me that she embraced all facets of life, including loss and sorrow. So, I wouldn't be afraid to cry if I were you.
Nadine: Yeah, I just hope I can get through it.
Nikolas: Well, just, I don't know, speak from your heart. Get up there and tell your friends and family exactly what she meant to you.
Nadine: I guess I just, I don't want her to really be gone.
Nikolas: I know.
Nadine: I want her to still be here until I'm the one who's old and gray.
Nikolas: I know, I know. Do you remember when I was grieving over Emily? You reminded me that I should live the way she would want me to and embrace every moment, and that was good advice that you gave me. Now I'm giving it back to you.
Nadine: I know you're right, and my head understands that but my heart is just...
Nikolas: Listen, if you feel yourself starting to break, just look for me, okay? I'll be right there.
Maxie: Nothing happened.
Lulu: That's convincing. Okay, what are you trying to cover up?
Maxie: Lulu, nothing happened. This apartment is just too small for the three of us. That's all. Shouldn't you be at the office?
Lulu: You said you wanted Johnny here.
Maxie: Yeah, when I thought he would be paying a third of the rent. If Kate calls in and gets rolled over to voice-mail, there is going to be hell to pay.
Lulu: I still haven't heard what happened.
Johnny: Maxie and I came through the living room at the same time last night and surprised each other.
Lulu: That's it?
Johnny: Yes, that's it. See you later.
Lulu: Wait, where are you going?
Johnny: I'm going to find a job.
Lulu: Did you not find one this morning?
Johnny: No. There's not much of a job market out there for a guy with just a high school diploma. So, the sooner I get out there, the sooner I can find a job and pay rent in my own place.
Lulu: Okay.
Johnny: Bye.
Lulu: Good luck.
Maxie: Satisfied?
Lulu: I don't think Johnny did anything wrong, but you look guilty as sin.
Luke: But you can't put me in ICU. I need my privacy.
Epiphany: Mr. Spencer, are you having chest pains?
Luke: Oh, no, no, no. The new diet I'm on, junk food, booze, and cigars, it's working miracles. You know, I have rarely felt better. Ironically, my marital status has never been worse.
Epiphany: And how is this my problem?
Luke: My wife is on the hospital board.
Epiphany: And don't we know it. That woman is a non-stop pain in the ass, and she's been even worse lately.
Luke: Yeah, yeah, destructive and combative and spoiling for a fight.
Epiphany: And taking it out on the entire hospital staff. You should have heard that woman screeching when we had to move her charity hospital --
Luke: It's because she's miserable. She misses me. Now, if you help me win her back, peace will reign in your world again and there will be a big cash infusion in mine.
Epiphany: And how do you plan to pull off this miracle?
Luke: It'll take a heart attack, my heart attack.
Claudia: You don't want a Christmas tree? What are you, one of those "bah, humbug" types?
Sonny: You want a tree?
Claudia: Yeah.
Sonny: Put one at your father's house.
Claudia: Oh, great, yeah, that would be good. So I could relive all of the warm, fuzzy moments from my childhood. No thank you.
Sonny: Whatever you want to do, you go ahead and do it.
Claudia: Okay, good, well, I want to ask Max. I think we should get Max's opinion. Max, what do you think? Do you think this room could use a little Christmas cheer? I don't know, maybe some nutcrackers, some poinsettias. You know, I don't know what else says Christmas. Like maybe a tree?
Max: Boss, I'm going to go make those calls you wanted me to make. Excuse me.
Claudia: I'm just really not seeing what the big deal is about making the room look festive.
Sonny: I used to have a tree for my kids, right? We'd decorate the tree, put presents underneath like what family's do, right?
Claudia: We're going to have a few presents, right?
Sonny: Michael is in a coma in the Aftercare Institute, okay? Carly has sole custody of Morgan, won't let me see him. And Alexis, well, I do have the right to see Kristina, but she'll do everything to avoid it.
Claudia: Okay, but if there's some way legally that you can see Kristina, I think it would be great if she came over here. I mean, I would love that.
Sonny: After everything that's happened this past year, including marrying you, I am not going to pressure Alexis.
Claudia: I'm still not seeing what the big deal is.
Sonny: I'm a father. I'm not going to be with my kids for the holidays. I don't need a damn tree to remind me of what's missing in my life.
Claudia: You know, there's this great story, which if you've never read, I'd be happy to get it for you. It's about a guy called the Grinch.
Sonny: I'm not joking, Claudia.
Claudia: And this guy, he had this idea, the Grinch, that he could stop Christmas. And the moral of the story is that he's wrong, because Christmas lives in the hearts and the minds of people everywhere and it's coming, whether you want it to or not.
Sonny: I might go to church, and that's what I'm going to do and it's going to be like any other day.
Claudia: And you really think that that will erase all the memories of the Christmases when your kids were with you?
Sonny: Okay, what are you -- are you going to get me so depressed that I want to kill myself?
Claudia: Well, you know, now that you mention it.
Sonny: Why are you so gung ho about Christmas? You don't want to spend time with your family, right?
Claudia: Well, when I was a kid, one of my first memories of Christmas were with my mother. She loved the holidays. She decorated the entire house, and she made eggnog and fruit bread, the whole thing. When I was five years old, one time there was this ginormous present under the tree, and when I unwrapped it, it was the most exquisite Victorian three-story dollhouse I had ever seen, with a mom and a dad and a brother and a sister. And I used to sit there and play with that thing for hours and hours and make up little stories. You know, about their perfect little life and how happy they all were in their beautiful house.
Sonny: Where's the dollhouse now?
Claudia: Daddy took a hammer to it, smashed it, threw my dolls in the trash. Surprised?
Sonny: That's terrible.
Claudia: Nice job, changing the subject there, by the way.
Sonny: Conversation's over. That's why there's no change in subject.
Claudia: You know, your kids love Christmas, right? So, they would want a tree. They would want you to have a tree.
Sonny: You're not going to let this go?
Claudia: Here's the deal. I happen to love Christmas, and I want a tree and I'm your wife and I live here, too. So, I'm damn well going to get one.
Robin: She looks so happy and content.
Patrick: Yeah, well, screaming for 15 minutes, six ounces of formula, and you can no longer say you're not as good at this as I am.
Robin: Have I become that predictable?
Patrick: She cries and fusses with everyone. You just take it more personal.
Robin: I guess. Anyway, I'm going to make up for it by giving us the best Christmas ever.
Patrick: I am way ahead of you.
Robin: Oh, really?
Patrick: Yes, I already shopped for your present and Emma's present.
Robin: Well, I don't see any boxes anywhere.
Patrick: That's because I don't trust you. So, I'm keeping them at Matt's house.
Robin: Oh, clever. By the way, I have to say, I'm glad that you're getting along with your brother so well.
Patrick: Well, I wouldn't say "so well," but, yes, it's good. You know, we're both working on it.
Robin: Yeah, well, I'm going to hide my presents in Emma's closet. So, no peeking, okay?
Patrick: Mm-hmm.
Robin: And since you don't have any surgeries scheduled today, why don't we go get our tree and the decorations and Emma's stocking? Oh, and then we could go to the pond and watch the skaters and then maybe go to that little cafe by the pond and get some hot chocolate.
Patrick: Let's just wait and see what we have time for.
Robin: Okay.
Patrick: Okay.
Robin: But it's Emma's first Christmas, and I just want to start some really good traditions.
Patrick: Well, I think that's a great idea, but she's not going to remember any of this until she's like three or four. So, let's just relax and enjoy the evening.
Robin: Okay, sounds good to me.
Patrick: Good.
Monica: Oh.
Tracy: Hi, Monica.
Monica: Hello.
Tracy: How are you coming with the needlepoint?
Monica: Moving right along.
Tracy: Should we make it into a pillow when you're done?
Monica: Tracy, you could care less whether it's a pillow or a pot holder. You're fishing for a favor. So, why don't you just get to the point?
Tracy: You know, Daddy and I had you appointed as Chief of Staff. The least you could do is show up for the job instead of needle pointing.
Monica: I was at the hospital all day. Not that it's any of your business.
Tracy: So, I bet cardiology is really hopping, what with all the holiday stress and all.
Monica: We've had our share of cases, yes.
Tracy: Any new patients I should know about?
Monica: What are you getting at, Tracy?
Luke: Ow. Excuse me, Nurse Johnson, your bedside manner could use a little work.
Epiphany: Well, this had better work.
Luke: It will. The only time my precious popsicle has ever expressed unconditional love for me is when I was at death's door. So, we just have to make her believe that's where I am.
Epiphany: You think that woman is worth all this work?
Luke: If you'd have told me, when I first tricked her into marrying me, that I'd be jumping through hoops to stay in this marriage, I would have told you you were a few cards short of a deck. But it turns out that Tracy and I are a perfect match.
Epiphany: You're broke and she's rich.
Luke: Like I said, a perfect match.
Epiphany: Look, I'm only doing this to keep a little peace in this hospital. If you get caught, I never saw you and don't you "Psst" me again.
Luke: Psst. I had to do it. I'm sorry. I had to do it. You can't leave. You've got to calibrate these machines so that I look feeble. Tracy's no fool. You know, if she gets wind of the fact that the details aren't right, she's going to know I'm faking.
Epiphany: You know, there is an easier way to get your wife back.
Luke: What's that?
Epiphany: Tell her you love her and mean it.
Lulu: If I catch you trying to make a move on Johnny again --
Maxie: Don't be ridiculous. The three of us living in this tiny little space, the last thing we need is the drama of a three-way.
Lulu: Oh, and you hate drama.
Maxie: There's no need for sarcasm. I was just trying to be nice.
Lulu: Yeah, and last time you were nice to Johnny you made a fool of yourself. So, do us all a favor and don't try again --
Maxie: Lulu, stop it. Nothing is happening, okay? I am human. Johnny is hot. I ran into him in the living room. I gave him an appreciative glance. That was it.
Lulu: An appreciative glance?
Maxie: Lulu, I'm telling you this as a friend, okay? Nothing drives away a man faster than insecurity.
Lulu: Johnny?
Johnny: I got a job.
Lulu: That's great. Where are you working?
Johnny: I'll tell you about it later. I got to go.
Lulu: Okay, I can't wait to hear. Johnny got a job already. I wonder where he's working. I wonder where he's working.
Maxie: Oh, good, you're both dressed and ready. Hi, Emma. I have 1,000 things to do for Kate and "Crimson" today and then 1,000 for myself, but your wedding comes first. We have a cake tasting appointment in 15 minutes. I love the buttercream.
Robin: Oh, well, Maxie, thank you for arranging that, but we can't go.
Maxie: Are you serious?
Robin: Well, yeah, Christmas is a week away. We don't even have our tree yet. And so, you know, tonight's the night.
Maxie: Well, let's get things straight. Your wedding is on December 26th, and Christmas comes once a year, so...
Patrick: We trust you implicitly, Maxie.
Robin: Yes, Patrick is right. I mean, since you did such and excellent job with our first wedding, we trust you. And since we decided that this one's going to be a little bit smaller and more intimate, it takes a little bit of the pressure off of you.
Maxie: I still want everything to be perfect.
Robin: It will be.
Lulu: Dad, what happened? I thought you were doing better.
Luke: Oh, I am, I am.
Lulu: Well, have you been having heart pains and not telling anyone? You can't do that.
Luke: No, no, Lulu. It's okay. I'm fine.
Lulu: You're not fine. You're in the hospital with machines and tubes.
Luke: I'm faking it. It's all an act. I had somebody on staff help me set it up.
Lulu: You're faking a heart problem?
Luke: Yeah, because of Tracy. I want her to take me back.
Lulu: Oh, my gosh. Dad, this is crazy.
Luke: Well, it's just crazy enough to work. Will you help?
Lulu: You want me to lie?
Luke: Yeah, it's for a good cause. You know, I want to get back living with my wife again. And you can come back to the Quartermaines if you want.
Lulu: I will pass on that.
Luke: The apartment working out?
Lulu: Yeah, it's cramped, but so far, so good. It told you, I'm splitting it with Maxie and Johnny's living there. We will have you over for dinner when you get out of the hospital.
Luke: Terrific. That will be great. Okay, here's the scam. I'm going to lay here with my tubes and my monitors, weak as a kitten. You're going to go to Tracy and tell her how scared you are.
Lulu: Yeah, but there's a problem. If you were sick, I would call France and have Mom come home.
Luke: Okay, well, all right, if that comes up, you just say that Mom's in recovery and you didn't want to drag her back here because it might interrupt her recovery.
Lulu: Yeah, that'll work.
Luke: In fact, tell Tracy that she's the only on who can make me live.
Lulu: Why don't you tell her yourself?
Luke: Oh, kids.
Claudia: The 10-foot trees are over there. Are you coming or not?
Milo: I'm right behind you, Mrs. C.
Claudia: Why do you look like you swallowed cod liver oil?
Milo: Mr. C is not happy about this.
Claudia: I know, but I'm happy about it and that's all that matters, okay? So, be a good bodyguard and come along.
Woman: This tree is dying. The needles are falling off.
Johnny: Lady, you just bought it.
Woman: I want it replaced with a good tree.
Johnny: It is good. It was cut down two days ago.
Woman: Don't you be rude to me, young man. Don't you realize the customer is always right?
Claudia: I'm sorry. Are you hard of hearing, lady? He said that the tree was two days old.
Woman: He's lying.
Claudia: My brother doesn't lie.
Woman: Your brother?
Claudia: Yeah, I'm Claudia and this is John Zacchara. Although, I recently married Sonny Corinthos. My husband has a really bad temper, I'm afraid. He doesn't like to hear about people harassing his in-laws.
Woman: My mistake.
Claudia: It sure as hell was. Milo, take this tree to her car for her.
Johnny: That was totally unnecessary, Claudia.
Claudia: What are you doing here?
Johnny: What does it look like? I'm working.
Claudia: It's manual labor, John.
Johnny: And I get paid for it.
Claudia: Why? Why, when I married Sonny so that you would get your inheritance?
Max: Ms. Davis is here to see you.
Sonny: Show her in.
Alexis: What, no Christmas tree?
Sonny: Okay, don't start with me. Is this a personal visit or a professional visit? What kind of visit is it?
Alexis: I'm here as district attorney.
Sonny: Oh.
Alexis: To follow up on the recent outbreak of violence in Port Charles. Andrei Karpov was shot three times, no witnesses.
Sonny: Yeah, I have an alibi.
Alexis: Yeah, I know, your ex-wife, which is actually possible given your propensity to fall into each other's arms at the exact moment you can cause maximum damage.
Sonny: What's the point?
Alexis: The point is Karpov's associates aren't buying your alibi, Sonny. Your father was beaten. His restaurant burned down. Your old office burned down. The Russian warehouse exploded. Three people died.
Sonny: The Russian syndicate are horrible people. You want to arrest them? Be my guest.
Alexis: There's a pattern here.
Sonny: What's that?
Alexis: Violence begets violence. An 18-month-old child was taken, okay? His rescue caused several other people to die. There is something seriously sickeningly wrong here in Port Charles, and it's my job to stop it.
Jan 11, 2009 03:34
Robin: Okay, I think we need a tree that's at least six-foot.
Patrick: Six-foot is good.
Robin: Okay, now we just have to figure out what kind. I don't like the noble fir ones. Those are the ones I think the branches are too far apart.
Patrick: See, this is where we stay out of the way here, Emma.
Robin: I can't remember the name of the kind that I like. Was it Scotch pine? I don't know. I forget.
Patrick: And one more tip, we let her make the decisions.
Robin: I like a fat tree, you know, a friendly, big, bushy-looking tree. Sometimes the ornaments don't hang straight on one, but that doesn't really matter, right? Hey, what are you telling Emma?
Patrick: Nothing.
Robin: Are you telling her that I have control issues?
Patrick: No, I'm saying that you're very good at making decisions, and that tradition is important for you, and that includes Emma's first Christmas tree.
Robin: You're good. Nice save.
Patrick: Thank you.
Robin: There it is, our Christmas tree.
Johnny: I am working, and I'm proud of it.
Claudia: John, you're one of the smartest people I know, and I love you. But you haven't attended a single year of college. So what are you going to do after the holiday season? Are you going to go into the janitorial industry or the food service industry?
Johnny: I'll figure it out when I get there.
Claudia: Johnny, you were raised in a mansion with everything you ever wanted. You think you're going to be happy like this?
Johnny: Working here is a hell of a lot better than watching you sell yourself to Sonny Corinthos.
Claudia: Don't get ugly.
Johnny: Claudia, this is ugly. You are with a man who hates you, who will kill you if he finds out that you got his son shot.
Claudia: I'm working Sonny. I am. I'm getting him to trust me. He's already halfway there, Johnny. We're talking. We're spending time together. He even cooked for me.
Johnny: You are living in a dream.
Claudia: Have a little bit of faith. I know how to play this.
Johnny: Okay, so what if you do, huh? Do you know what you want to gain through it? Do you have any idea what you're doing or why?
Claudia: Yes, Sonny's going to make the business stronger, and I'm going to be right by his side.
Johnny: Well, good, I'm happy for you. I hope you're happy.
Claudia: I'm doing this for you, John. When the time comes, we will get rid of Sonny, and you'll take over. You will take your rightful place.
Johnny: Claudia, you're just not getting this. I'm done with this family, with this life. Now, I love you, you are my sister, but what you do, you do for yourself.
Luke: Look, daughter, I know that faking a massive coronary might seem like extreme measures.
Lulu: You think?
Luke: Well, you know, ever since Tracy's threatened to divorce me, I've been begging her on hand and knee to take me back.
Lulu: Well, a little begging might be good for you.
Luke: No, it isn't good for me. It isn't good for any man. You need to be respected by your life's partner. She's just been putting me down too long. It stops right here in this hospital bed.
Lulu: You know what? I kind of get why Tracy is so upset.
Luke: Well, I don't get it. I love her. I want to be married to her. What more does she want?
Lulu: To come first. If you can't say it to her and mean it, I get why she wants to leave. It's got to be awful coming second to someone else.
Luke: She doesn't come second.
Lulu: Then what is she? You got to be honest with yourself, Dad. You owe that to Tracy.
Tracy: They tell me you've had a massive heart attack.
Alexis: Long ago, before you and I made that critical error in judgment to become personally involved when I was your attorney --
Alexis: Do you remember?
Sonny: Yes, yes.
Alexis: That hypocritical arrangement that we had that I would only participate if it wasn't blatantly illegal, nor would I defend anyone who willfully committed an act of violence.
Sonny: Well, yeah, you knew what was going on and kind of looked the other way.
Alexis: Because there were extenuating circumstances. You were the extenuating circumstance, because I believed in you.
Sonny: Well, I never pretended to be a good person, but I do have a code.
Alexis: Oh, God, the code. Yes, I know all about your code, because I made all kinds of excuses based on that code. And I fell into the trap of rationalizing that you were a good mobster. And by ignoring the truth that a mobster by definition is a threat to an orderly and peaceful society, I have contributed to escalating the violence in this town, which has now reached biblical proportions. And at any moment, I expect a plague of locusts to descend upon us.
Sonny: Well, you know that wouldn't be good for you, because you hate bugs.
Alexis: Don't -- do not, no, do not be charming, because it is not going to change the fact that you are wrong. And that became clear the minute you married Claudia Zacchara.
Nikolas: That was a very moving eulogy you gave.
Nadine: Thanks for being here, Nikolas. I couldn't have gotten through that without you.
Vance: I'm proud of you, Nadine. And Raylene's looking down in heaven just as proud.
Nadine: Thanks, Uncle Vance.
Attorney: I hate to intrude, but Raylene was adamant about you hearing her wishes as soon as possible.
Nadine: Oh, you mean the reading of the will?
Attorney: It's actually on DVD.
Vance: Well, the TV is right over here. Just plug it right on in, and we'll watch.
Nadine: I don't expect this to take very long. She didn't have much besides this farm and a few pieces of china.
Attorney: Well, I'll just let Raylene tell you more.
Raylene: Hey, there, Vance, Bo, and Nadine. If you're watching this, it's safe to say that I've passed on to another life. I want you to know that I loved you all. I don't regret a minute of the life I led, and I hope none of you do either. Now, before I go any further, I want you all to prepare yourselves, especially you, Nadine. There's a lot about your Aunt Raylene that you don't know.
Robin: Okay, you got it?
Patrick: I thought we agreed to a six-foot tree. This isn't a six-foot tree.
Robin: That is. It's about six feet. Okay, keep going. I think you should put it over by the window. That's good. A little bit to the left. No, left. No, a little bit more to the right, back to the center.
Patrick: Okay, you better be careful. Emma's going to think you're a control freak.
Robin: Okay, now turn it around. The bushy side has to be over here.
Patrick: They're all bushy sides.
Robin: Just turn it around just a little bit. Good, right there. Now, that is a beautiful tree.
Patrick: Yes, gorgeous and heavy.
Robin: Christmas is eight days away, and this is already my favorite Christmas ever.
Patrick: I agree, but the best present isn't coming on Christmas.
Robin: Wait until you see what I got you.
Patrick: Well, it can't compare to the 26th when I marry the woman that I love.
Tracy: When you collapsed at the Haunted Star last night, perhaps I made a mistake leaving you there?
Luke: This isn't a game, Tracy. I don't want to lose you.
Tracy: Luke, I'm sick to death of the emotional rollercoaster.
Luke: I know how much I've hurt you. I'm sorry. I want it all to stop.
Tracy: And what? We go back to our rose-colored denial until Laura shows up?
Luke: I love you. I miss you. I miss us. What is it going to take to convince you that I mean what I say?
Tracy: Well, drinking yourself into an oblivion is a little more convincing than I need.
Luke: Well, that's what desperation does to you.
Tracy: Yeah, but Luke, you promised me you would take care of yourself. And you dove right back into your bad habits.
Luke: Well, you dove back into yours. Haranguing me, berating me, putting me down all the time.
Tracy: I do it because I --
Monica: Tracy, I'm going to have to ask you to step outside, please.
Tracy: Why?
Monica: Because I asked you to.
Monica: I just got your test results back, and your condition is dire.
Sonny: I sent Kristina some Christmas gifts. I don't know if she got them.
Alexis: Don't change the subject.
Sonny: No, I'm just saying, it's the holidays. I can't talk about --
Alexis: Yes, she got the gifts.
Sonny: She got the gifts?
Alexis: She loves the gifts.
Sonny: All right, that's good.
Alexis: All right, well thanks for the gifts. You're not coming over for Christmas, because you have created a climate that is way too dangerous.
Sonny: Okay, I will wait until things calm down.
Alexis: And when exactly do you think that will be now that you've chosen to marry into a family that's a leading crime syndicate?
Sonny: I did not think you would approve.
Alexis: The only possible reason that you would marry such a horrible woman is to form an alliance with the Zaccharas. I'm not even going to get into the archaic practice of using a woman to cement a business alliance.
Sonny: You want to lecture Zacchara, go ahead, you feel free.
Alexis: No, it's my job to deal with the head of the family, which is now you, right?
Sonny: I'm just supervising their interests.
Alexis: What on earth would make you do something this dangerous?
Sonny: Because I wanted to get back into my organization and that didn't happen. Do you understand what I'm saying?
Alexis: No, I don't.
Sonny: This gives me a base of my own.
Alexis: I don't care. They don't even pretend to have scruples or ethics. They play dirty, and now you're their godfather. Congratulations, you are officially a bad mobster.
Sonny: I'm a bad guy. I had to do what I had to do.
Alexis: And see, so do I. No more excuses. I can't do it. No more alibis. Not going to happen. You screw up, I'm going to have to prosecute you to the full extent of the law. Be careful, because this time you're going to be the one who has to take the fall.
Raylene: First of all, I'm sure you're all wondering what'll happen to the farm. Bo and Nadine, I'm dividing it equally between the two of you. It'll be up to you to decide whether to sell it or keep working it. Vance, I don't want you to think I've forgotten you. I have so many wonderful memories of our childhood years. Heck, you were the one who taught me how to swim. Remember that summer day at the creek when you told those older boys, in no uncertain terms, to stop making fun of your little sister?
Vance: Right before you threw a couple punches at them.
Raylene: You were a wonderful brother. And I'm leaving you $2 million.
Nadine: She didn't have that kind of money.
Raylene: I'm leaving Bo another $1 million. And since he's your son, I'm sure some day in the far off future, he'll be inheriting your money, too. Nadine, honey, I'm leaving $3 million in trust for the care of your sister Jolene. I hope and pray that some day she will wake up, but either way, her care will be taken care of and not be a burden on you. I'm also leaving you an envelope.
Nikolas: Wait, stop this. This is absurd. The rest of the family gets millions of dollars, and Nadine gets an envelope?
Claudia: Watch out for the lamp.
Sonny: So, you didn't listen to me, I guess? Obviously.
Claudia: Yeah, what can I say? I'm a pushy broad.
Milo: Sorry, boss.
Sonny: No, it's not your fault, Milo. It's her fault. Whoa.
Claudia: Maybe just in the corner over there, yeah? That's good, Milo. That's perfect.
Sonny: Listen, I don't want anything to do with that tree. I don't want stringing things on it. I don't want any ornaments hanging off it. I don't want to do anything with it.
Claudia: Okay, well, that's not a problem, because I'm going to do everything myself. And the tree is going to have gold, and it's going to have tinsel, and it's going to have lights, and it's going to be really, really beautiful. And you're going to really like it. I have a prediction to make. By the time Christmas comes, that tree right there, the sight of it, is going to actually make you feel better.
Sonny: Don't bet on it.
Claudia: Oh, Sonny, come on. You have to admit -- come on, admit that it makes the room look festive.
Sonny: Yeah, the tree's all right. Looks kind of tall and stuff. It's nice. It's nice.
Lulu: Sorry I'm late.
Maxie: You need to get better at checking your messages. What if I had been Kate?
Lulu: First of all, Kate is still in Manhattan. Second of all, I have things going on in my life other than work. My dad is in the hospital, and I had to go visit him.
Maxie: Oh, my God, is he okay?
Lulu: Yeah, he's fine. He's faking a coronary.
Maxie: Oh.
Lulu: What do you need?
Maxie: Well, I tried to tell you earlier, but you were sidetracked over your paranoia over Johnny.
Lulu: If you don't want to get sidetracked, stick to the point and stay out of my personal life.
Maxie: Fine, the decorator put a tree in Kate's house, and she hates it, so we need to buy another one, decorate it, and have it waiting for her by the time she gets back from the city.
Lulu: Okay, well, then while we're here, should we get a tree for our place?
Maxie: Don't you think that's like a little too sisterly. Then we'd have to decorate it and put presents under the tree for each other.
Lulu: Yeah, that would be really weird actually.
Maxie: On the other hand, it is our new home, and I kind of like presents.
Lulu: Let's just find Kate's first, okay? How about that one?
Maxie: It's lopsided.
Lulu: Fine, then that one.
Maxie: What is this? Throw a dart and pick a tree?
Lulu: I want to pick something so I can talk to Johnny and hear about his new job.
Maxie: Well, goody for you and Johnny, but Kate's picky, so we're not going to rush.
Lulu: Well, if we're going to have to look through every single tree, let's get started now.
Maxie: That's his new job?
Monica: There is no time to waste. Get an O.R. ready immediately. Call Dr. Laurence. I want him to scrub in, because I'm going to perform surgery immediately.
Luke: Surgery?
Monica: Yes, you need a quadruple bypass, Luke.
Luke: No, no.
Monica: The test results are clear. Your cardiac enzymes are off the chart, indicating cardiac ischemia. You could arrest at any moment.
Luke: What the --
Tracy: Monica, how bad is it?
Luke: Come in here.
Monica: I'm sorry. There really isn't time for good-byes at the moment.
Luke: Good-byes? What are you talking about? Good-byes?
Monica: Sedate him right now. I want him in a twilight sleep when we get him to O.R.
Luke: Oh, my God.
Jan 11, 2009 03:35
Luke: Sheath your scalpel, Doctor. There are things I need to say to my wife.
Monica: Ex-wife. She isn't family anymore, and technically, she shouldn't even be here.
Luke: Tracy, don't move.
Leyla: He's going into v-tach.
Luke: Wait, wait -- wait, just wait.
Monica: If we wait in your condition, you could die. Sedate him.
Luke: You sedate me, and I'll punch your lights out. You can't do this.
Bo: Who put you in charge, Cassadine? We're Raylene's family, and we want to hear her last will and testament.
Vance: These are my sister's dying wishes.
Nikolas: I just find it hard to believe. You inherit millions, and she gets an envelope. That's --
Nadine: Nikolas, please don't.
Nikolas: No, I saw how much she loved you. I saw that firsthand.
Nadine: She wanted me to have an envelope.
Attorney: Are you saying there is something irregular with the will?
[Sam groans]
Sam: Ow! Ow!
Luke: No offense, Dr. Quartermaine, but the last time you sliced me open, I very nearly kicked the bucket.
Monica: Well, I was grieving the loss of my daughter and my husband.
Luke: Yes, and Tracy almost had to grieve the loss of her old man.
Monica: Well, Tracy and I have buried the hatchet, and at the moment, you don't have many options open to you.
Luke: I would like just a little time to reflect on this before jumping back up on your operating table. I'm sure you understand. And I would like that time to be with the woman I love.
Leyla: I'm not sure you realize what bad shape you're in, Mr. Spencer.
Tracy: I do not have a problem with Monica slicing you open, because I think you should get what you deserve, what you need. The sooner the better.
Luke: Well, I would like just a little time to make peace with you, buttercup. Alone. I have a confession to make.
Monica: Oh, I don't think it's going to come to any shock to Tracy if she finds out that you threw your heart out of whack because you were cheating on her with some bimbo. But then, that wasn't really the case, because she's already dumped you.
Luke: Tracy is the light of my life.
Monica: And she's going to be wearing black and fitting you for a pine box if we don't get going, Luke.
Luke: I don't need an operation.
Leyla: All your tests say otherwise.
Monica: And so do the monitors.
Luke: That's because they're all rigged, all right?
Monica: What?
Luke: The tests, the monitors -- I faked it all.
Tracy: Told you.
Bo: You think we somehow forced Aunt Raylene to make the video and give us all that money?
Vance: We didn't even know she had it.
Nadine: That's not what Nikolas meant.
Bo: What did you mean?
Nikolas: Look, I'm not accusing anyone of anything here, really.
Vance: But you're hoping to get your hands on a piece of Nadine's inheritance, but turns out she only got an envelope, which probably was a nice letter from Raylene and some of her recipes.
Bo: Since there's nothing in it for you now, why don't you leave?
Nikolas: I apologize. I shouldn't have interrupted. This is a family matter. It's Raylene's last wishes, and they should be honored. I apologize.
Raylene: No doubt you're all wondering why I didn't leave Nadine any money, why she gets an envelope instead, and the answer is, Nadine is the only one I trust to do the right thing.
Customer: They haven't come up with the financing. Right, it's got a big bare spot. Okay, turn it so I can see the other side. Sorry, it's a $3 billion dollar project, so -- right, I know. Stop, right there. Now just -- hold on, Bill. You're supposed to pull down the branches so I can see what it's going to look like when there's a bunch of gold and silver crap hanging all over it.
Maxie: Wow, this is a long way from Johnny Zacchara, wild rebel with a bottomless bank account.
Lulu: Who is this idiot talking to Johnny like he's a dog?
Maxie: Johnny looks like he wants to punch his lights out.
Lulu: He won't. He is determined to make it without any of his family's money. I don't want to see this anymore. Let's go.
Maxie: Yeah, it'd be super humiliating if Johnny knew you'd seen him like this.
Spinelli: Oh, hey, fair blonde cohabitants, what a happy coincidence.
Spinelli: Well, I, too, am looking for a Christmas tree, something worthy of casa de Stone Cold.
Maxie: Well, they have an awful selection.
Spinelli: Nonsense, I see plenty of lovely specimens.
Customer: Okay, tie it up, and use the tarp. You scratch the top of my car, no tip. Sorry, Bill. The rigors of Christmas tree retail were too much for this kid to handle. Right.
Spinelli: I'm sure you'll have no trouble finding a suitably festive tree.
Lulu: No, we're going to go someplace else.
Spinelli: Yeah, but I'm just going to -- I'll seek assistance.
Lulu: No, no, Spinelli, it's okay.
Spinelli: Excuse me, kind Tannenbaum attendant. My lovely friends and I are looking for assistance.
[Pounding on door]
Lucky: Is she here?
Jason: Wait, what are you talking -- what's going on?
Lucky: Just answer the damn question. Is Sam here?
Jason: The last time I saw Sam was at the courthouse after we gave our statements to the federal agent.
Lucky: You know what? It's been a long couple of days, and I'm a little ragged. Just answer my question. After what you and Sam have been -- you know what? The hell with it. Maybe I just jumped to conclusions.
Jason: Okay, hold on, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Why are you looking for Sam? When was the last time you saw her?
Sam: Hello? Hello, can anyone hear me? I'm trapped down here. Hello?
Sam: Help! Somebody. Help me.
Johnny: It's not a bad gig. Tips are decent. Of course, you have to deal with the occasional jerk.
Lulu: That's true with any job.
Maxie: Yeah, but I can't believe you didn't hit that guy. I mean, he was talking to you like a total moron, and you handled it perfectly.
Spinelli: I'm sure the cell phone-yammering scrooge is an anomaly at such a festive enterprise as this. I bet his negative energy is overwhelmingly offset by those seeking holiday cheer.
Johnny: Yeah, I like seeing the happy kids running around, and you can't beat the pine-fresh scent.
Spinelli: Oh, and to that very topic, might I inquire as to your inventory? See, I seek a tree that has not been brutally harvested at the end of a buzz saw.
Johnny: You want a tree in a pot?
Spinelli: Yes, I am looking for an eco-friendly approach to the Christmas festivities.
Johnny: They're right over there.
Spinelli: Oh, excellent.
Maxie: Does Jason know he's going to have a Christmas tree as part of his permanent decor?
Spinelli: After the holidays, I will transport it to a woodland area and plant it in a place where it will flourish and grow.
Maxie: That's different and very cool.
Spinelli: Woo, look at this fine specimen. Hello.
Johnny: Say, you need a hand?
Spinelli: Um --
Maxie: Spinelli, I like this one. It's very Christmasy and says, "Take me home, please."
Spinelli: If it brings Maximista joy, who is the Jackal to refuse? Okay.
Johnny: Thanks. I can drive it over later, if you like.
Spinelli: Oh, Jackal is more than capable. Okay -- one, two, three. Okay.
Johnny: Not what you expected, huh?
Lulu: You needed a job, and you went out and got one. That's better than what most people do.
Johnny: If my dad could see me now.
Lulu: This is good, honest work. Nothing to look down on. And after the holidays, you'll get a better job.
Johnny: Yeah, well, you know what? I'd sling Christmas trees for the rest of my life if it meant I didn't have to go back to my family.
Milo: Does Mr. C know?
Claudia: What?
Milo: That you brought that stuff down.
Claudia: None of your business. Why don't you knock? You should knock before you come in here, understand?
Milo: I'm sorry.
Claudia: Where's that mail? You said you were going to bring my mail.
Milo: It's all right here. I stacked it for you.
Claudia: So you did. Sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you.
Claudia: Milo! Change of plans. We're going to go out.
Vance: Raylene had her own way of doing things, right up to the end. It's a hell of a thing.
Eric: I wish there was something else I could do.
Nadine: Oh, you did so much for her while she was alive. I can't thank you enough for that.
Bo: It's just not fair, us getting all this money.
Nadine: It's what Raylene wanted.
Bo: I feel bad, Nadine.
Nadine: Don't. Whatever is in this envelope is -
Bo: Probably some embarrassing family secret that you're put in charge of.
Nadine: Well, I am happy that Aunt Raylene has entrusted this to me.
Bo: If you need anything, don't hesitate to --
Nadine: I'll be fine.
Bo: That's right. You got yourself a prince. That stuff I said about you being after Nadine's inheritance, I didn't --
Nikolas: I understand. You're just looking out for your cousin.
Nikolas: Well, Aunt Raylene certainly had a flair for the dramatic, didn't she?
Nadine: Yeah. I guess it's time to see what all the mystery is about.
Nadine: I know this is silly, but part of me thinks that what's in here is something really amazing, but the other part thinks that maybe it's not, and then I might be kind of disappointed, and in that case, it would be better if the news came from you. So would you mind?
Nikolas: Oh, okay. Well, whatever she left you, I know that she loved you and trusted you and believed in you, and those are all things that you can carry with you the rest of your life, so --
Nadine: Right, yeah.
Nikolas: All right, you ready?
Nadine: Yes.
Nikolas: Okay.
Nadine: Oh, my gosh.
Tracy: Not only did you commit fraud --
Luke: It was harmless fun.
Tracy: You diverted valuable hospital resources from truly sick people. You admitted it to the chief of staff. Please call the authorities.
Leyla: Dr. Quartermaine, if you don't need me, I should get back to the desk.
Monica: No, that's all right. You go ahead.
Tracy: Don't go far. The police are going to want to take your statement.
Monica: I would love to turn you into the cops, but --
Tracy: But? No buts about it. He's a liar. Throw him in jail.
Monica: But Tracy has made our lives miserable since your latest breakup, and I don't think her mood's going to improve if you go to prison or you get tried for fraud. So for the sake of harmony, I am going to let this slide. But don't you ever, ever pull a stunt like this again.
Tracy: That's it?
Monica: No, that is not it. What I want from you, Tracy, is to admit that you love Luke, take him back, and please stop driving the family crazy.
Luke: I meant everything I said before about you, about this, us, everything.
Tracy: You're just trying to weasel back on the gravy train, Luke. You have been playing me all along.
Luke: You have been playing me too, wife.
Tracy: Don't call me wife. I'm not your wife.
Luke: Yes, you are. I know that you didn't go through with the divorce.
Nikolas: It looks like a schematic for some sort of a plow.
Nadine: Yeah, and look right there in the name, "Patented by Raylene Crowell."
Nikolas: It seems that Aunt Raylene was a woman with many unexpected talents who continually surprises, much like yourself.
Nikolas: God, and how many times have I driven by a farm and seen a plow, not knowing that the entire time my aunt is devising a better way for it to work, and not only that -- she made it a reality. You think it's silly that I am so excited about this.
Nikolas: No, no, not at all. I think it's something that you should be very proud of.
Nadine: God, but she had this whole separate life as an inventor. I mean, why would she keep that a secret from all of us?
Nikolas: I don't know. My only guess would be based on my experience with various businesses that I own. I think your aunt is a right-brain type thinker, an idea person, and I think creative people need to just go off into their own separate world, you know?
Nadine: Yeah, I guess so. I mean -- also, why wouldn't she entrust it to the entire family? I mean, why leave all of this information just to me?
Nikolas: Maybe it was because of the special relationship that you shared with her. Maybe she knew that you'd appreciate it in a way that no one else could. I mean, look at the way you reacted, you know? It was more about the achievement and less about the monetary value of this. I mean, because you know this is probably worth a great deal of money, right?
Claudia: Hey, do you guys sell olive branches?
Johnny: Fresh out.
Claudia: Okay, well, I guess this will have to do, then. It's biblical. Come on, you know, like Noah and the ark. Come on, you remember Noah. Noah jumped through hoops of fire. He did everything he was told, just to prove himself, and what happened? He got stuck with a bunch of animals, up to his neck in crap. Kind of like you and dad.
Johnny: Then the dove came with the twig in his mouth, the proverbial olive branch, signifying it was safe to get out, which it still is. You know, I'm living proof.
Claudia: I'm sorry that we fought. I don't want to fight with you, and I'm sorry I came down so hard on you about working here.
Johnny: I'm turning over a new leaf, clean slate, and you know, I may not have anything, but I'm free of Dad, of all of it.
Claudia: Used to be my dream, too.
Johnny: You can still make that happen. The only one stopping you is you.
Claudia: Well, my dreams have changed, and my ambitions have changed. But one thing that hasn't changed is my love for you. So here, Johnny. Take it.
Lucky: The last time I saw Sam was in our apartment after she gave her statement, but I couldn't stay. Elizabeth just got called in by Agent Rayner. It was the very last minute. I knew how difficult it would be for Elizabeth to talk about what happened at the cabin, the fact that she had to shoot one of those Russian mobsters, and I did not want Elizabeth to have to face that alone. Sam and I, we both agreed to meet back at her apartment for dinner. She wouldn't answer her phone. She hadn't called.
Jason: Well, has she done this before, just taken off?
Lucky: Yes, but she always calls. Somehow she gets word back to me. You know as well as I do that once Sam gets something in her head, like going undercover, there's no getting through to her. I've been able to handle some better than others, but before I left, Sam and I -- we had a few words.
Jason: Did you have a fight?
Lucky: Yeah.
Jason: About what?
Lucky: Sam -- Sam said something about wanting to track down the Russian syndicate, something about going after Sasha Donev.
Jason: Okay, so Sam didn't show up? You just assumed that she came over here and we were working together?
Lucky: Yeah, now I'm just worried that Sam has gone after Sasha Donev alone.
Jan 11, 2009 03:36
Sam: Hello?
Johnny: Put that away. You're going to get mugged.
Claudia: John, it's -- no part of this money came from Daddy. I have my own money from my mother, from Uncle Rudy. It's -- you're not taking anything from him.
Johnny: Well, it would be the same to take your money.
Claudia: What, you're --I'm sorry, you're comparing me to Daddy now?
Johnny: Claudia, this isn't about you.
Claudia: What, because I made the tough choice, because I made the tough choice for all of us, because I married Sonny?
Johnny: It was your choice, your life, and I told you not to do it.
Claudia: I love you, Johnny. I do. And I love that the family hasn't completely crushed your spirit, but one of us has to be practical here, okay? You have the Zacchara name behind you and everything that goes along with that, and you always will.
Johnny: Well, I plan on giving that name a new meaning.
Claudia: But you can't completely escape who you are, Johnny, not what this family has done. What you have done. There's too much history. There's too many people with an axe to grind, and I want to make sure that you have all the resources you need to deal with whatever comes up.
Johnny: If I thought of it that way, Claudia, I would be admitting that I'm trapped. That things can't change.
Claudia: But they can't. Not completely. That's reality.
Johnny: Your reality.
Claudia: Take the money, John. Hey, if you never need to use it, then great. But if you do, then you have it.
Johnny: If I take the money, Claudia, it's the first step to being sucked back in, and I'm not going to do it.
Claudia: What are you getting here, minimum wage at best?
Johnny: I'll survive.
Claudia: Well, you can't live on pride.
Johnny: Maybe not, but it's a hell of lot easier to starve when you're on your own, when it's your own life. So thanks, but no thanks.
Woman: Can you help me with a tree, young man?
Johnny: Sure.
Woman: When you're finished here.
Johnny: We're finished.
Nadine: So you think all the money she left to Vance and Bo and to take care of Jolene, do you think it comes from the patent from this invention?
Nikolas: It makes sense to me. According to the will, she didn't have any other assets. No stock, no equities, nothing.
Nadine: She did this all on her own.
Nikolas: Yeah. I mean, clearly, someone's paying a lot of money to use this patent to manufacture farm equipment. I think it would even be used internationally.
Nadine: You think my aunt's invention is used in other countries?
Nikolas: To generate this kind of revenue, it has to be. And for her to leave the patent to you only insures that any future income from this goes directly to you.
Nadine: Oh, I can't wait to go to the factory. I want to see her invention coming right off the assembly line.
Nikolas: Clearly, I don't know anything about farm equipment. I never would have dreamed that a coupling for a plow would be this valuable, right?
Nadine: Oh, I don't really care about the money. I just care about the invention and that she entrusted me with it, and to be responsible for it.
Nikolas: Who better than you to safeguard Raylene's vision?
Nadine: Oh, that's a beautiful way of putting it. Safeguarding her vision. Of course, you could just be buttering me up, now that I am an heiress.
Nikolas: That's true. I could just be a fortune-hunter and nothing else.
Nadine: I'll take my chances.
Jason: Sam's phone records. Hack into them. Now.
Spinelli: If fair Samantha is quarrelling with the cleft-chinned keeper of the peace, perhaps she just needed to decompress after their love spat.
Jason: Sam never called Lucky.
Spinelli: Maybe passions needed to cool, especially if the quarrel was over a like-minded former lover.
Jason: You talking about me?
Spinelli: No doubt Stone Cold assumes that the conscientious cop has nothing to worry about, but believe me, the mere thought of the woman you love being in close proximity with a fearless man of danger can cause irrational thoughts. Case in point? Maximista's regrettable decision to cohabitate, albeit temporarily with the former mob prince. Maximista and the younger Zacchara, they tolerate each other at best, and the idea that they could have an involvement, emotional or physical, is laughable. But see, in your case, an emotional ordeal like rescuing young Jake is a crucible that could --
Jason: Sam and Lucky weren't fighting about me.
Spinelli: How do you know that?
Jason: Because Lucky told me that. Get back to the phone records.
Spinelli: Yes, I abide. What am I looking for?
Jason: Okay, I got a hang-up last night right before Diane came over to talk about legal stuff. I had no idea at the time Sam was missing.
Spinelli: If fair Samantha tried to contact you and was thwarted, she might no doubt be in imminent danger--
Jason: Do you want to help Sam?
Spinelli: Yes.
Jason: Yeah? Stop talking and focus.
Sam: Lucky. Lucky, you came to get me.
Lucky: Do you love me?
Sam: Yeah, you know I do.
Lucky: Do you love only me?
Sam: No, no, Lucky, please! Lucky, don't go.
Jason: Sam wanted to go after the Russians on her own. That's what she and Lucky were fighting about, okay? Now if things went wrong and Sasha called Sam --
Spinelli: Wait, Stone Cold thinks that fair Samantha went after the villainous one?
Jason: Okay, listen. Sasha was always more than Karpov's attorney. She was the center of operations, right? Karpov's dead, now the Russians are relying on her to take control and restore order.
Spinelli: Why would fair Samantha go after them without backup?
[Computer beeps]
Spinelli: Ah, I'm in. Fair Samantha's last call was at 9:05 to you.
Jason: To me. Okay, best way to find Sam is to find Sasha, and we need to figure that out.
Spinelli: All right. I could perhaps hack into her e-mail accounts and trace her texts, her I.M.'s. Communication with her people in the syndicate might reveal her location and if fair Samantha was apprehended.
Maxie: I know, the Russians, the danger, yada-yada. This won't take long.
Jason: Make it quick.
Spinelli: It's a matter of grave importance.
Maxie: Then don't waste time explaining it to me. Just take this. I was shopping for Kate's Christmas decorations and they made me think of you. No big deal. Just Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, scrooge.
Luke: Nurse Johnson. I hope you'll accept my apology for having dragged you though the minefield of my tumultuous personal life.
Epiphany: You dragged it into the middle of my hospital.
Luke: I'm a man in love.
Epiphany: What is it that women see in men like you?
Luke: You mean besides my devastating good looks, my sparkling wit, and my youth?
Epiphany: Pathetic.
Luke: No, I'm not pathetic. I'm desperate.
Epiphany: Not you. Her. Personally, I would have drop-kicked you into the next county, and if you ever drag me into one of your schemes again, I will.
Luke: Yes, I understand. Thank you very much.
Luke: Any chance you're waiting for me?
Tracy: As a matter of fact, I am. I'm happy you tried that ridiculous stunt. I'm happy that you cared enough to make the effort.
Luke: I'd go a lot further for you.
Tracy: Until Laura shows up. And I get slapped in the face with a big fat mackerel, and once again, I'm second.
Luke: You're not second. How can I make you understand that?
Tracy: Fine. I'm not second. But I'm not first, either.
Lulu: Can I give you a hand?
Johnny: Why aren't you at work?
Lulu: Maxie and I got Kate's second tree home and decorated. God knows if she's actually going to like it, and we made her dinner reservations in Manhattan, so she's out of our hair for the duration.
Johnny: Wow, you have a devious mind. I like it.
Lulu: And I'm great with a power tool. Oh, I can do that.
Johnny: No, I don't doubt that you can, but my boss isn't exactly in the holiday spirit, and I'd hate to get canned my first day on the job, especially after the speech I gave Claudia.
Lulu: Claudia, she was here?
Johnny: Yeah. She didn't exactly approve of my choice in careers, and we got into it. She came back to apologize and told me that she supported my decision to walk away from the family.
Lulu: That's impressive.
Lulu: What?
Johnny: She came with a big wad of cash and told me that I was going to need it. That I was kidding myself if I thought that I could be like any normal kid striking out on his own. That I have the burden of my family name and everything that comes along with it, and everything that they've done and that I've done --
Lulu: She's wrong.
Johnny: That's what I told her. Not that I wasn't tempted to take the cash and stash it away in case I needed it.
Lulu: But you didn't.
Johnny: No, I didn't.
Lulu: Well, that's great. We can do this. We can do this on our own.
Luke: Look, I wish I could pretend that my life just started in this moment. I wish I could pretend that I never loved Laura, that it's just always been us, but I can't, can I? I mean, if I did, you wouldn't believe me anyway.
Tracy: I'm not talking about the past.
Luke: Yes, you are. You're talking about the past. When Laura was diagnosed with this mysterious illness, and I was told that she would never recover, I let her go, Tracy. I tried to get on with a new life. This new life I envisaged was going to be long periods of industrial strength drinking broken up by meaningless hookups.
Tracy: Of which I was but one.
Luke: In the beginning, I wanted to get into your bed, into your bank account, have a few laughs, and be gone. I never anticipated that I would get serious. I never thought that I would want to plan a life with you.
Tracy: And then Laura woke up.
Luke: Well, that can't change what's happened between us.
Tracy: But you love Laura.
Luke: You're talking like, you know, Laura and I could go back to the way things were, and we can't. That's impossible.
Tracy: And if she said she needed you?
Luke: She's the mother of my children. I've loved her half my life. She has a terrible disease. If she said she needed me, I'd be one cold-hearted bastard to just turn my back on her.
Tracy: Okay, and what if she came to you and said how much she loves you and she wants to try again, what would you say then?
Luke: That's not going to happen.
Tracy: That's not an answer.
Luke: I want a life with you, Tracy. With you. And you know it. That's why you didn't go through with the divorce.
Tracy: You didn't answer the question.
Luke: That's because you made up this fantastic scenario, far-fetched imaginary situation. I don't know what the hell I'd do.
Tracy: I do. You and Laura would walk hand in hand into the sunset and live happily ever after. But I will not be around to watch it.
Jason: Spinelli, you okay?
Spinelli: The thoughtfulness of Maximista's gift has just rendered me temporarily speechless. Observe. The most excellent ornaments to grace the branches of our Tannenbaum. It will be the most beautiful Christmas tree ever.
Jason: Yeah, those are nice.
Spinelli: Just what -- who would have guessed that Maximista would have been paying attention at all when I was describing the workings of the comic book universe?
Jason: Well, that should tell you all you need to know, Spinelli.
Spinelli: You know, you're right. I will no longer fret about John Zacchara's residing in Maximista's proximity again.
Jason: I'm happy for you. Really, I'm happy for you. And I really need you to focus now.
Spinelli: Sorry. The trace is still running and will soon yield -- uh -- the Slavic seductress has just made a call on your cell phone.
Spinelli: The specific digits are --
Jason: Yeah, this is Jason Morgan.
Sasha: By now you must be looking for Sam. I know where she is.
[Sam grunts]
Sam: Ow! Ow. Oh.
Jerry: Surprise. Oh, I wish I could see your reaction right now, Claudia. Your heart racing, the look on that lovely face of yours. Shock mingled with anger. The ever-present hint of lust. Oh, my God, you are such a fine specimen. Alas, by now, I've probably vanished without a trace or died trying. It's pretty likely that I'll never have the pleasure of your company again. But, as you know, I am an amoral bastard and I draw the line at shooting children. And in point of fact, Michael was Jax's stepson. It seems really unfair that the poor kid's lying in a permanent state of coma while you go on your merry way. So, even though I loathe Sonny, he's a father and has a right to know what you've done, which probably means that Sonny will kill you. But I think that you deserve a fighting chance to save yourself. Besides, I like games. So I'm going to play a little game with you. I made a lovely DVD detailing your part in Michael's shooting. The DVD is hidden in Sonny's house somewhere. If you find it before Sonny, you can save yourself. So let the games begin, darling.
Jan 11, 2009 03:37
Carly: Hi.
Jax: Hi.
Carly: Come in.
Jax: Thanks. You moved out of the hotel.
Carly: Yeah, Morgan and I decided to spend Christmas here.
Jax: Yeah, I wish you would have told me. If only just, you know, to know where to bring his present.
Carly: I didn't want to have another argument about our divorce. Or say things we don't mean. You know, this Christmas is going to be hard enough.
Morgan: Jax!
Jax: Hey, hey, hey. How you doing, Morgan?
Morgan: Is that for me?
Jax: Yes, it is. And we're going to put it under the tree as soon as it's decorated.
Morgan: Are you going to spend Christmas with us?
Jerry's voice: Now, there are several DVDs hidden throughout the Corinthos house and grounds. Each one contains a clue to the location of the next DVD, but the real prize is on the last DVD. That's the one that reveals your part in little Michael's shooting.
Sonny: What are you hiding?
Jason: Where's Sam?
Sasha: You can't expect me to make this easy for you.
Jason: Just let me talk to her for a second.
Sasha: Well, Sam can't come to the phone right now. And if you don't find her soon, she won't survive at all.
Anna: Hi, Robin. Hey, honey. I'm back. I got all that stuff in London you wanted. Oops. I'm back. Lots of treats. Tons.
Anna: Robert?
Robert: Hi, honey, I'm home.
Anna: You know better then to creep up on me life that.
Robert: Good to see that age has dampened your reflexes.
Anna: Oh, my God, I could have hurt you. Does your oncologist know? What are you doing? Are you trying to kill yourself?
Jax: Lady Jane misses Jerry very much, and I don't want her to be alone on Christmas, so I'm going to go spend it with her.
Morgan: Can she come here?
Carly: Well, Lady Jane wants to be at her house for Christmas, kind of like we want to be here. And Jax is her son, so she needs him with her the way I need you with me.
Morgan: Okay.
Jax: Okay. I'll tell you what, since I'm not going to be here Christmas morning to watch you unwrap this, maybe your mom will let you unwrap this now so I can see if you like it.
Morgan: Can I?
Carly: I think that's a great idea.
Jax: Go for it. Rip it up.
Morgan: What is it?
Jax: It's a video gaming system.
Carly: "V-tech V-motion"?
Jax: That's right. I promise you're going to like it just as much as Morgan. All right. Let me help you set this thing up.
Jax: Okay. Take it out of the box. There I go.
Claudia: My computer is off-limits, Sonny. You just stay out of it.
Sonny: I though you wanted me to trust you.
Claudia: What I want is for you to respect my privacy.
Sonny: Well, you should have thought of that when you logged on in the middle of my living room. It's obvious whatever you got there you don't want me to see it.
Claudia: Well, yeah, because it's about the Christmas present that I'm getting you.
Sonny: Here's what I want -- nothing. I am not celebrating the holidays this year, all right? And you wasted your --
Claudia: I don't consider a Christmas tree a waste of time.
Sonny: What the hell have you done?
Jason: What do you want?
Sasha: More than I can say in a phone call. Meet me in an hour, Pier 52.
Jason: If anything happens, I know who to blame.
Sasha: Play nice, Mr. Morgan. Right now I'm your only chance at saving her.
Spinelli: The jackal can only surmise that the Slavic seductress is holding fair Samantha captive.
Jason: She knows where Sam is, and she said she'll tell me if I meet her on the pier.
Spinelli: You can't go.
Jason: Unless you find Sam, what am I supposed to do? What choice do I have?
Spinelli: But then when you're felled by a sniper bullet, what good will you be to Sam or any of us?
Morgan: This is so cool.
[Jax laughs]
Jax: I think he likes it.
Carly: Morgan, did you say thank you to Jax for giving you such a great gift?
Jax: Nah, that's okay. Let him play. He might not even know it, but he's actually learning as well.
Carly: It's a thoughtful gift.
Jax: No, he's an incredible kid.
Woman's voice: Congratulations, you have completed the puzzle.
Carly: Hey, sweetie, let me have that. Come here. Look, I need to talk to Jax for a minute and --
[Indistinct whispering]
Carly: Can you do that?
Carly: Thanks.
Jax: Yeah, I'm glad he likes it.
Carly: No, really, thank you. Thank you for being such a great stepfather. Morgan's lost a lot this year. You know, Michael and his father have disappeared out of his life. He shouldn't have to lose you, too, so thank you.
Jax: Yeah, you know I love Morgan. I'll never abandon him.
Carly: We'll be thinking about you on Christmas.
Jax: I'll be thinking about you, too. About how much has changed since last Christmas. When Michael was still around, and we were a family. I'll probably be asking myself, how the hell did we get here?
Sonny: Who gave you permission to dig these out?
Claudia: They were lying around in a box. I just wanted to make this --
Sonny: You wanted, but I told you I didn't want this Christmas tree or anything, but you didn't listen. I mean, look, you have no right to hang this up.
Claudia: Look, you can yell at me all you want, if it makes you feel better, but you're not mad at me. I'm not the one you're mad at. You're mad at God or the universe or whoever you think you can blame. You're mad because the little boy that made that ornament is in a coma and might never wake up, and if yelling at me makes you feel better, then have at it.
Sonny: It wasn't God or the universe who caused Michael to be shot. That was me. And I don't need a damn Christmas tree to remind me.
Patrick: Mrs. Lindsey is stable, but still critical. I put a note in her chart to notify me if anything changes.
Epiphany: What about on Christmas?
Patrick: If that's when it happens, then that's when I'm needed.
Matt: No. If it happens on Christmas, you call me.
Patrick: Okay, first of all, you're not taking my patients from me.
Matt: Wait, first of all, I've performed this surgery before, and, secondly, it's not complicated.
Patrick: That's not the point. It's my patient. I can handle it.
Matt: It's Christmas. Don't you want to start some sort of traditions with your family, like mistletoe or carving a pumpkin or something? Anything.
Patrick: Hmm. I take it you're not big on yuletide traditions.
Matt: I'm just saying, you miss the first Christmas, it's that much easier to miss the second, and then all of the sudden, you become the father who's never there. Come on, you have to admit that was kind of deep.
Patrick: Aren't you the one who sneers at warm and fuzzy?
Matt: Hey, consider it a gift to my niece.
Patrick: Wow, apparently the polar ice caps aren't the only thing that's melting.
Matt: Don't make me regret my incredible gesture of kindness, okay?
Patrick: Fine. Then we'll compromise. You can watch my patient on Christmas day, but the day after, you're busy.
Matt: I am?
Patrick: Yes, you have a wedding to go to.
Matt: That didn't work out so well last time.
Patrick: Well, that wasn't your fault. And, besides, I need a best man.
[Pager beeps]
Patrick: Think about it. Let me know.
Robert: I've never felt better. I'm as strong as an ox.
Anna: You're laying it on a bit thick, aren't you?
Robert: I'm in remission. I fooled everyone. I walked away from this.
Anna: Not that I don't trust you, it's just that I don't trust you, so I'm going to call the clinic and make sure that you didn't liberate yourself without your doctor's knowledge.
Robert: We're not into this doubting me again, are you?
Anna: Old habits die hard. Robert, really, if you have compromised your treatment, not to mention your life, I will personally sedate you and get you back to the Swiss Alps myself.
Robert: Read my lips -- I am in remission. Call the clinic if you wish. The only thing they're going to tell you is that I was the worst patient on record.
Anna: I can't tell you how that shocks me to my core. No. Honestly, you can't go jet-setting around the world when you're in treatment.
Robert: Then give me a simple test, come on. Come on.
Anna: What kind of a test?
Robert: I don't know, think of something.
Anna: I can't throw down on a cancer patient.
Robert: You couldn't because I taught you all the moves. Try something else.
Anna: You won't even remember the moves because you're senile.
Robert: I remember everything. Senility occurs in women first.
Anna: We know who's oldest at least.
Robin: Dad?
Anna: I don't know. I think it's clean living. I wouldn't know anything about that.
Robert: You don't have to tell me about clean living. Look, I just --
Robin: Hey!
Anna: Hi.
Robin: What are you doing?
Anna: We're fighting.
Robert: We're playing catch up.
Robin: I don't believe it. Why are you here?
Robert: Because this is where my only daughter is getting married.
Robin: Of course, I am thrilled that you're here, but are you really well enough to travel?
Anna: Oh, please. I have been all through that.
Robert: We'll talk about that later. I want to meet my granddaughter.
Robin: She's trying to see you. She wants to say hello. Here, sit down. You want to meet your grandpa? This is Robert Scorpio. And if you need a hero ever, he is your guy. There you go.
[Emma coos]
Robert: Aren't you just --
[Robin laughs]
Robert: Too precious for words.
Robin: Here, try this.
Robert: Hang on a sec. You want to be in a level position there. There, oh, yeah. Try the bottle.
Robin: That's what she wants.
Robert: Works for me, too.
Anna: It's just a different formula.
Robert: You know, you are absolute proof that I did something right in this world. Whoopsie. There, try that. You know, I'll let you in on a secret. When I was in that hospital, knocking on heaven's door, part of the secret is it was actually the other place --
Robert: But there was something I felt that I needed to do. And you know what? I'm doing it right now. You, my darling, were definitely worth the fight. There.
Jason: If you can't get a lead on Sam's location, I have to meet with Sasha.
Spinelli: I sense a shift in the force, master.
Jason: What are you talking about?
Spinelli: Well, I have no doubt fair Samantha is worthy of rescue, regardless of the circumstances, and you are not one to sit idly by when the forces of evil do their work. However, I have noticed that many of your rescues are done grudgingly. And that does not seem to be the case with fair Samantha.
Jason: Sam saved Jake. What do you want me to do?
Sam: Aah!
Jax: It's just as well we can't see into the future, all the good times we've had. I'm glad that we didn't know that it was all going to fall apart.
Carly: I don't know how I'm going to get through the holidays. Just when I feel like I'm catching my balance, you know, I just --
Jax: Morgan will help you. And just think of what's best for him. You just take care of the son you have, and it will help you deal with the one that's not here.
Carly: Maybe you're right. Michael loved Christmas, you know. I know if he had a wish, it would be that we're all happy, especially his little brother, so --
Jax: I know, I know. Hey, what did you make for me?
Morgan: It's a card from me to Jane.
Jax: Oh, wow, I'm impressed. You're quite an artist. I love this, it's so Lady Jane.
Morgan: I miss you.
Jax: Hey, I miss you, too. Merry Christmas, Morgan. I'll come and see you as soon as I get back, okay?
Jax: Okay.
Carly: Have a safe flight. And have a merry Christmas.
Jax: Yeah, I will. You have a merry Christmas, too. See you, buddy.
Claudia: It's obvious you didn't put Michael in a coma. The way I hear it, you were the intended target.
Sonny: I should have had guards. Maybe I should have reacted differently when I saw the rifle.
Claudia: Well, maybe you could play it over and over in your head a million times. It's not going to end differently.
Sonny: I know I can't change what happened, but what I can do is to take back control of my life and punish the people who continue -- who just continue to hurt innocent people.
Claudia: Being shot at is just part of the job.
Sonny: Well, you and I know that. But this freak Devlin, he broke the rules. He tried to kill me in front of my own kid. They say he acted alone, but you know what? A doctor involved with drugs tries to take out the head of the most powerful family in Port Charles, on his own. Does that make sense to you?
Claudia: I don't know, but maybe he was crazy.
Sonny: Maybe, maybe. Yeah, maybe. Maybe he wasn't.
Claudia: Look, it's almost Christmas. I mean, Christmas is coming. You miss your kids, and I'm sorry for whatever I did to make that worse for you.
Sonny: The only gift I want is to find out if the man who shot my son had an accomplice.
Claudia: Devlin paid for what he did with his life.
Sonny: That's not enough.
Patrick: Well? Did you think about it?
Matt: I thought about how desperate you must be.
Patrick: Don't tell anybody that. Are you going to be my best man or what?
Matt: What happened to the bartender, Coleman?
Patrick: Coleman will understand if I want my brother there.
Matt: Okay, I mean, you know I had big plans that day. It involved, yeah, a six-pack, a large-screen television, highly-competitive football, and some cheerleaders.
Patrick: Well, that's why they invented DVRs, Matt.
Matt: No, seriously, like real cheerleaders. Okay, look, you don't have to keep compensating for what Noah did. I feel like you're, you know, with all these sentimental gestures, I --
Patrick: You know what? When I became a father, things changed for me. Family became important again. And that hasn't happened since my mom died. The truth is, kids -- actually, everyone, we're shaped by our upbringing.
Matt: Yeah, isn't that a scary thought?
Patrick: Yeah, but it's a fact. You know, we have two choices. People can either follow in the footsteps -- if you're an abuser, you become an abuser. If you're a cheater, you become a cheater. We both know what happened to us, the way Noah raised us. And I'm choosing to go the other way. I want to be a devoted father -- an involved, devoted husband. That's what I'm choosing.
Matt: Yeah, and this is all because your baby -- because Emma smiled at you?
Patrick: Yeah, but that's a hell of a smile.
Matt: Yeah, apparently it was. Look, you don't have to keep making up for what Noah did to me and my mother.
Patrick: I'm not asking you to stand up out of guilt or redemption. It's actually a lot simpler than that. Robin's an only child, and we want Emma to have an extended family. And the last time I checked, you're my only brother.
Matt: Okay, Patrick, just think about this for a second, all right? We barely know each other.
Patrick: So what?
Matt: So what? You're asking me to stand up for you on what I assume is going to be the biggest day of your life.
Patrick: Yeah, which I think would probably be one of the coolest things ever, my brother standing up for me. Look, I want you there. Can you do that for me?
Matt: Yeah. Yeah, I can do that for you.
Jan 11, 2009 03:38
Robert: Wipe the goofy expression off your face.
Anna: What goofy expression? I don't have a goofy expression.
Robert: You look like you just kicked dirt into my grave.
Anna: Really? I didn't think I looked that cheerful.
Robin: Dad, you have been very sick, all right? So we have the right to get all sappy and teary-eyed over you.
Robert: Well, yeah, but I don't want --
Anna: He doesn't want us to treat him like he's an invalid.
Robert: Yeah, I don't want to be treated either like I'm about to fall over.
Anna: Well, then why don't put together a list of looks and comments that are acceptable to you, and we'll try to stick to that.
Robert: Rule 101 for surviving cancer is thou shalt enjoy life.
Anna: Then don't stop us from enjoying ourselves. You know, seeing you with your granddaughter for the first time was a lovely moment. So sue us.
Robert: Robin, sweetie, do you want me here or not?
Robin: Dad, of course I want you here. But it isn't out of character for you to show up and act like you're perfectly fine when you're not. I mean, I am getting married, but I don't want you to risk your life over it.
Robert: Look, at the risk of repeating myself, which I'm about to, I'm in great shape. They signed off on this trip. I promise. Call the doctors. Ask them. They'll tell you.
Robin: No. I'd rather take your word for it.
Robert: Yes.
Anna: Oh, no, please.
Robin: Mom, be nice, or at least pretend in front of Emma.
Anna: I can't believe how much she's grown since I went away for a few weeks.
Robert: What? You mean she was smaller than this?
Anna: Yeah. She's so gorgeous.
Robert: Well. Huh. You know, I see a lot of Robin.
Anna: Yeah.
Robert: You, too.
Anna: Really?
Robin: It's funny. I see her dad in her cute, little nose. I guess we all see what we want to see.
Anna: Honestly, she's exactly like you when you were a little baby. She's got the same chin and eyebrows and the shock of dark hair.
Robert: Must have been precious.
Anna: I'm sorry you didn't know her then.
Robert: You did what you had to do. I tell you, I'm so proud I could bust.
Anna: It gives you chills, doesn't it? Oh, dear, God, listen to us. Oh.
Robert: Oh, we sound like grandparents.
Anna: Oh, hush your mouth.
Sasha: I wasn't sure you'd come.
Sasha: If I hadn't caught Sam following me -- spying on me, I'd have no bargaining chip at all. When we were driving Sam out of town, she escaped. Even that should have been a disaster, but I managed to -- what's that quaint little saying that you people have? To turn lemons into lemonade, because you see, Sam ran, Sam fell, and then she got trapped. And that led to you and I having this nice, little talk. I couldn't have planned it any better.
Jason: Just tell me where she is.
Sasha: I could have killed her, you know, but I'd rather use her. It's nice how we'll each get out of this in one piece.
Jason: Oh, so you want to trade Sam's location for your ticket out of here.
Michael's voice: Dad, dad, you made it.
Sonny's voice: Where else would I be, huh?
Michael: Wait up, wait up.
Sonny: Come on, come on.
Carly: You are just in time, because two little boys need to hang their stockings or Santa is just going to fly right over the house.
Michael: We cannot hang our stockings without you.
Sonny: Okay, let's celebrate the family Christmas that your mama promised us, okay? Come on, give me those things.
Carly: Okay. Guys, go, go, go.
Sonny: Okay, let's see what we got. Do we have letters for Santa?
Michael: Right here.
Morgan: Right there.
Sonny: Cookies?
Michael: Okay, I laid out the cookies and some chips, and the carrots are from Morgan for the reindeer.
Sonny: Oh, you always got to take care of the reindeer.
Michael: You have to.
Sonny: Right. All right, let's go. Let's get these up.
Carly: We have it all.
Sonny: What do you want, Morgan?
Morgan: A game.
Sonny: How did I know that? Okay, you get that.
Carly: Okay, wait, one, two, three.
Sonny: Hi.
Carly: I need to see you.
Sonny: Why?
Carly: I don't want to get into it over the phone. I'm at my house.
Sonny: Okay, I'm on my way.
Sonny: Don't wait up for me, thank you.
Robert: So let's talk about the wedding. I guess you invited, what? 10,000 of your closest friends?
Anna: Since when have you been interested in anything as mundane as a wedding?
Robin: Mundane? My wedding will not be mundane.
Anna: No, no, no, I didn't mean that as opposed to, you know, saving the world from anarchy or whatever.
Robert: My only daughter is getting married, and I'm still alive to see it.
Anna: Oh, that is something.
Robin: Well, maybe, that's why I went into labor in the first, fake wedding, so that he could be here for the real one.
Robert: I like the idea that you're doing it the day after Christmas. Now, that way, the husband is less likely to forget the anniversary.
Anna: Men are so practical.
Robin: Mm-hmm.
Robert: Did I say something wrong?
Anna: Nothing more than usual.
Robin: No, Dad, actually we picked the 26th because we just couldn't wait any longer. And it gave me enough time to get a new dress because the other one, I was, you know --
Anna: Oh, but it was beautiful.
Robert: Hey, look, what can I do to help? You know, do you need a limo, or you need more booze, a bouncer, a pink carpet, red carpet?
Robin: No, no, no, we're fine. Actually, Maxie is arranging the entire thing, so all you have to do is show up.
Robert: How is Patrick? Has he been a good boy?
Robin: He is. He is. I mean, he is so good with Emma. She likes him more than me. And he takes great care of me, even though I don't make it very easy for him.
Robert: No second thoughts?
Robin: About marrying him? No. I got rid of my doubts a long time ago.
Anna: I've rarely seen two people support and love each other more.
Robin: There's my man now. Hi. Look, the gang's all here.
Patrick: I didn't know if you were well enough to come.
Anna: Well --
Robert: How could I stay away when you and I have got that father-in-law to son-in-law chat to have?
Sasha: Look, I'm an attorney. And I get paid well for what I do. Sometimes, that means looking the other way. But I draw the line at taking a toddler hostage.
Jason: You tried to kill us when we were rescuing Jake.
Sasha: I thought my employers would kill me if Sam succeeded.
Jason: You're still breathing, aren't you?
Sasha: Only because Andrei is dead, and they have no one else to manage the ground. But it's only a matter of time. So, you're going to finance my escape, and in exchange, I'll tell you where to find Sam.
Jason: How do I know she's not already dead?
Sasha: You don't. But she was alive when I last saw her not even an hour ago. Continue to waste time, and she will likely not survive. You don't trust me. I don't trust you either. But desperation makes for strange bedfellows. So as a matter of good faith, I'm going to let you in on something that you might like to know. You've hurt the syndicate. They're beginning to question the wisdom of setting up shop in Port Charles. Send the right message, and they will most likely cut their losses and move on. I plan to be far away when that happens. So, do we have a deal?
Alexis's voice: Sam, you have to wake up.
Sam: Alexis?
Alexis's voice: I want you to get up and start walking. You have to keep moving.
Sam: I'm so tired.
Alexis: You cannot go to sleep. If you go to sleep, you will freeze to death.
Sam: You're not even here. You're in my mind.
Alexis: I'm telling you what you already know. You can save yourself, but you have to get up. And you have to keep moving.
Jerry: You know, there were some nasty rumors going around that you and Sonny might get married. I mean, that's a match made in hell. But you know what? I understand the concept. You know, the great dynasties of Europe intermarried to consolidate power. But of course, inbreeding and an overblown sense of ego destroyed most royal houses. On the other hand, if your marriage to Sonny never happened, you'll have to find a very good excuse to --
Claudia: Get to the point, you psycho.
Jerry: This is really, really quite amusing. I mean, the truth about little Michael Corinthos is right under his father's nose. Sonny might stumble upon it and find out that you're behind that whole, nasty incident. But I can understand that by now you're anxious to start the game. So, I made the first clue a really easy one. The first DVD is hidden in the window to your soul.
[Jerry laughs]
Jerry: I mean, that's presuming that you have a soul. So, we'll find out soon enough. See you on the next DVD -- or not. All right, darling?
Robert: They had no sense of humor in that clinic. I mean, if there was any booze there, I could never find it.
Patrick: Okay, I'm off. Mushu pork, lettuce-wrapped chicken. How many orders of pot-stickers you want?
Anna: Get three.
Patrick: Three, okay.
Robin: Actually, Mom, would you mind going with Patrick, make sure he remembers everything?
Anna: Sure. Come on. You behave yourself, you three.
Robert: You know, you're still my little girl.
Robin: Don't say that. I'm trying so hard to act like a grown-up.
Robert: Well, you've always older than your years. I mean, your mom and I knew that you were an old soul. I took a lot of comfort out of that. I felt that it would probably serve you well as you got older, that and the fact that you're a raving control freak.
Robin: I am not.
Robert: I can remember -- we would sit around the dinner table, or we would start to sit down at the dinner table, and you would take it upon yourself to tell everybody where they could sit.
Robin: Well, it was a tough job, but somebody had to do it.
Robert: You were always beautiful, and you've always known your own mind as long as I can remember.
Robin: You know, I really -- I remember the first day I met you. And I was thinking, wow, that man's really tall. And he's handsome, and he's nice to me. And then I found out you were my dad, and I felt like I was the luckiest kid in the world.
Robert: The pleasure was all mine. I mean, you've been that gift that just kept on giving.
Robin: I'm really glad that you're here.
Robert: That's what I finally wanted to hear.
Robin: Okay, fine, but, now you have to tell me how you're really feeling.
Robert: Well, I'm about 90 percent. The other 10 percent -- I'm going write that off to being on the wrong side of 40.
Robin: Well, you look good. Your hair is growing back.
Robert: Oh, that's my summer cut. It's hip -- whatever hip is.
Robin: You get your appetite back?
Robert: Yeah. I eat like a horse.
Robin: Good, good, and you're walking around all right?
Robert: Yeah, I can -- why?
Robin: I was just hoping since you're here, that you would walk me down the aisle when Patrick and I get married.
Alexis: Sam, you have to wake up. The more you sleep, the more you come closer to dying.
Sam: Why do you care?
Alexis: Because I'm your mother.
Sam: No. Now I know I'm -- you don't like being my mother. You don't even like me.
Alexis: Baby, that's not true. Maybe that's why you're seeing me now.
Sam: I want my mother to save me.
Alexis: I can't save you, Sam. But you know how to save yourself. And you can do it. It's the only chance you have to make things right. So get up and start moving.
Jason: Yeah, Bernie. Go ahead, send it now.
Sasha: Thank you.
Jason: I gave you want you want. Tell me where Sam is.
Sasha: I am so relieved to get out of this place. My one consolation is knowing that you will beat those sons of bitches that I -- uhh!
[Sasha gasps]
Jason: Be quiet, be quiet. Okay, okay, okay. Tell me where Sam is. I gave you what you wanted. Tell me where she is.
[Sasha gasps and coughs]
Carly: You came.
Sonny: You said it was important. What's going on?
Sonny: The tree looks nice.
Carly: Yeah.
Morgan: Merry Christmas, Dad.
Jan 11, 2009 03:40
Robin: I want this wedding -- my -- my actual wedding, to be perfect. And it will be if you'll agree to walk me down the aisle.
Robert: Well -- I am deeply honored. And I -- I love you to death. But I can't do it, no.
Jason: Where -- where is she? Tell me how to find her.
Sasha: White --
Jason: Come on, tell me.
Sasha: Rock.
Elizabeth: Do you need help with that?
Cameron: Yes.
Elizabeth: Do you see what the problem is? You took the laces out of the hole, silly goose. Let's put these laces back and we'll fix the bunny here, okay? Now whip it around.
Sam: That is not your baby. You have no right to take that child. Give him back.
Maureen: I'm sorry. I -- I didn't know -- I didn't just --
Sam: Just give him back. Give him back. Come on.
Sam: He's okay.
Sonny: So when did you get so tall? You been doing all right? Working hard in school? Come over here.
Robert: I'm ridiculously honored and proud of the life you've made for yourself. But come on, let's face it. I made hardly any contribution to it.
Robin: I disagree.
Robert: I have no right to walk you down the aisle.
Robin: Of course you do. You have every right. You're my father.
Robert: What about my brother?
Robin: Well, he walked me down the aisle the first time.
Robert: Yeah, but that didn't count.
Robin: Come on. Uncle Mac will understand.
Robert: He'll say that, but it's not fair that I come in at the last minute and steal his glory.
Robin: Listen, I will always be grateful to Uncle Mac for everything that he did for me. But you're my dad.
Robert: And a pretty lousy one, too, as you've reminded me on a couple of occasions.
Robin: Well, that was before you got sick. And I have to say, now that I'm a parent, I'm just beginning to see how hard it is and I realize that, well, you made decisions in order to protect me.
Robert: Well, a lot of that is true. But I made few sacrifices to really accommodate my family. Let's face it. It's easy to be a hero when you're halfway around the world. My brother was here. He was working on the foundation that helped you become -- the incredible person that you are now.
Robin: Dad, I want you to do this, please.
Robert: I'll tell you what. How about you let me run it by him and we'll -- we'll take it from there?
Robin: What? You're leaving?
Robert: I'm going out for some fresh air.
Robin: It's freezing outside.
Robert: The exercise won't kill me.
Robin: Okay, well, jut out of curiosity, what should I tell Mom when she gets back?
Robert: Well, you can tell her that her ex has a lot on his mind.
Jerry: This is really, really quite amusing. I mean, the truth about little Michael Corinthos is right under his father's nose. Sonny might stumble upon it and find out that you're behind that whole nasty incident. But I can understand that by now you're anxious to start the game. So I made the first clue a really easy one. The first DVD is hidden in the window to your soul.
Ric: Now, that is the best sight I have seen all day.
Claudia: How did you get past Milo?
Ric: I gave him a banana. Better question -- what are you looking for? Maybe I can help you find it.
Carly: So Morgan and I decided that we wanted to spend Christmas here at home. Didn't we?
Sonny: You sure you're comfortable with that?
Carly: Yeah, for the most part. This is where we wanted to be.
Carly: We have a lot of memories in this house, don't we, buddy?
Morgan: Does Michael know it's Christmas?
Sonny: I think he does. Want to know why? Because he loves you. And he loves Christmas. So, in a way, it's going to be like he's with you now. I mean, unfortunately, he's not going to walk through the door because his body is still where it is, but Michael's spirit will always be with you, you know? Like taking care of you, like a -- like a guardian angel.
Carly: A Christmas angel.
Sonny: And you know, because he always takes care of you. You know that, right? He always wanted the best Christmas for you. He wanted the biggest tree -- didn't he teach you how to shake the presents to see what's inside?
Sonny: A lot of memories here. Can't forget that, right? And -- you know why you can't forget that? Because all Michael wanted for you was to be happy -- and have a great Christmas, okay? Don't forget that, okay?
Carly: And that's what your father and I both want for you, too, okay?
Elizabeth: How did that woman get Jake? I didn't even see her.
Sam: It's okay. He's fine.
Elizabeth: I should've been paying closer attention. If you hadn't stopped her --
Sam: I just -- I would never let anyone hurt this little guy.
Elizabeth: Thank you, Sam. Thank you for rescuing Jake.
Spinelli: No, not to worry. I'm just -- you know, I'm just checking in to see if Stone Cold had reported in in the last half hour or so. Oh, no, no, no, not a big deal. Not a big deal at all. Now I'll just sit around and eat potato chips and drink refreshing orange soda until the master's inevitable and timely return. Yeah, thank you, bye. Oh, God. Yes, beneficent one, 'tis I, the Jackal. We are at Defcon one red alert. Yes, Defcon one red alert. We're --
Spinelli: Cancel Defcon one red alert. Repeat, cancel Defcon --
Jason: Who is that? Bernie?
Spinelli: Yes. Affirmative. I thought you had walked in to an ambush.
Jason: I did. Place an untraceable call to 911, okay? Tell them there's a body on Pier 52. A sniper took out Sasha right before she was going to tell me where Sam is.
Spinelli: It's done.
Jason: Okay, now see what you can find out about white rock.
Spinelli: One word or two?
Jason: I don't know.
Spinelli: Is it a business, home or landmark?
Jason: I don't know that either. I just know that it's close to here and I know that Sasha said to me white rock. I think that's where Sam is. So find something.
Luke: Where are you? Bursitis? Bursitis? You can't come up with anything better than that? Look, I don't want to hear about bursitis when I'm standing here freezing my jingle bells off. Get down here or be ready to swim back to Cuba. What a waste.
Robert: Nice work, Spencer. I can see you haven't lost your touch.
Claudia: Sonny broke this Christmas tree ornament and I'm just trying to find it and glue it back together.
Ric: Since when do you clean up after Sonny?
Claudia: It was kind of my fault.
Ric: You don't believe that.
Claudia: Yeah, I do, actually. I -- I -- Sonny didn't want a Christmas tree and I went and got one anyway. And then I went upstairs and I got down the ornaments that his kids made for Christmas and I put them on the tree because I thought it would make him feel better. It didn't.
Ric: Did he hurt you?
Claudia: No, of course not.
Ric: I know my brother's rages, Claudia. Even though he professes himself to not be violent towards women, he is dangerous all the same. Next time, do me a favor. Just call me.
Claudia: Yeah, Sonny will calm right down if I do that. He's going to be upset that he broke the ornament because Michael made it. But if I can find it and glue it back together before he gets home --
Ric: Okay, okay, yeah, I know. Yeah, I get the -- I get Sonny getting mad and breaking something that he loves, but you being all worried about it and trying to fix it, not so much. The ornament is over here, by the way.
Claudia: Huh.
Ric: Is there a DVD that goes with this?
Claudia: Yeah. Actually, I'm downloading some Christmas carols for you.
Ric: Okay, any chance at all that you're going to tell me what's really going on here?
Claudia: Now that we found the ornament, I can glue it back together and maybe Sonny will start to trust me. The sooner Sonny starts to trust me, the sooner I can get what I'm really after.
Ric: Mm-hmm. And what are you really after?
Claudia: You, for one thing.
Ric: Look --
Ric: Are you serious?
Claudia: Mm-hmm, come on.
Sonny: Listen, I didn't know I'd get to see you tonight, so I didn't bring your Christmas present. You okay with that?
Morgan: Yeah.
Sonny: But whenever -- I'll -- I'll get it to you, okay? Don't worry about it.
Carly: Hey, Morgan, why don't you go upstairs and get your daddy's Christmas present?
Carly: Okay.
Sonny: So what made you call -- call me over here?
Carly: Morgan is getting older. I don't want his Christmas memories to be staying at a hotel after his mother screwed up yet another marriage. I don't want him to wake up Christmas morning and miss Michael and miss you. I thought about just bringing him home and try again. You know me. Never say die.
Sonny: I appreciate that.
Carly: You were right about Michael. He loved Christmas. And he always wanted Morgan to have fun.
Carly: Morgan misses you. And he needs you and you need him. Christmas is supposed to be about miracles. So I'm hoping that this year, the Christmas miracle will be that we can -- well, we can somehow heal, you know?
Sonny: So what are we talking about here, just for Christmas or are you going to let me back in Morgan's life?
Patrick: Hey, I hope you and your dad are hungry.
Anna: Yeah, you know what is so weird? Not going to Kelly's when I'm here in Port Charles. It just seems so weird.
Robin: Well, at least Mike's out of the hospital.
Anna: Oh, yeah?
Anna: Oh, so where's Dad? Is he in the closet with the -- in the nursery with the baby?
Robin: Actually, he left.
Anna: Is he feeling all right?
Robin: I asked him to walk me down the aisle.
Anna: Oh.
Robin: Yeah. He said no at first and then he said, "Well, we'll have to run it by Uncle Mac."
Anna: Well, there might be some truth to that, but I don't know. I just think it's all this domesticity, the new granddaughter. It's just getting to Robert.
Robin: Yeah, well, I hope he doesn't do something stupid to try and feel young again.
Anna: What, like buy a sports car? I mean, honestly, he should be excited that you asked him and that he's now beaten cancer. I mean, what's wrong with him? He's just so arrogant.
Patrick: There's nothing wrong with arrogance if you are the best.
Anna: Oh, my God. Your father would say that.
Robin: I know.
Patrick: Well, maybe Emma will cut me down to size.
Anna: One can only hope.
[Robin chuckles]
Anna: Listen, don't worry about your dad. He'll be back.
Anna: He might even walk you down the aisle, too, once he gets used to the idea.
Robin: Well, even if he doesn't, would you be my matron of honor?
Luke: Why aren't you in Switzerland?
Robert: You think I can't beat a simple thing like cancer? It's called remission.
Luke: Congratulations, pal. That's great news. We'll celebrate. We'll start with a good Cuban cigar as soon as Jorge gets here.
Robert: Well, I've made some sacrifices. Have you called 911?
Luke: No, they can't help her now.
Robert: Do you know what happened?
Luke: No, she was dead when I got here. I came down to meet my Cuban connection who is now 18 minutes late.
Robert: Didn't you have a quadruple bypass? I mean, didn't that tell you something?
Luke: We've both been turned back from death's door. What that tells me is the party's still on. I intend to enjoy it to the last second.
Robert: Well, I haven't given up all my vices. I can still drink your wobbly back end under the ground, starting right now.
Luke: You're on. Let's get hammered.
Robert: Wait, wait, wait. We can't just leave her here, you know.
Luke: I don't think I've seen her before. She may be a shill for the Russian mob.
Robert: That's too bad.
Officer: Freeze!
Ric: Look, I'm not complaining. I'm just saying, we are under Sonny's roof here.
Claudia: Hey, this is my bedroom, so I'll do whatever the hell I want. Besides, he won't be home for hours.
Ric: Okay, so one minute you're falling all over yourself trying to get back in Sonny's good graces. The next, you're doing what would appear to make this entire deal fall apart.
Claudia: Oh, well, maybe I'm just one of those crazy Zaccharas.
Ric: No, no, no, come on, wait a minute, wait a minute. Slow down, slow down. Maybe you're scared. Come on, what is it? Why don't you let me help you?
Claudia: You want to help me?
Ric: Yeah.
Ric: Oh, yeah.
Claudia: Help me.
Jax: Marty, I should be available on my cell phone most of the time, but if there are any packages, just forward them to the address in the email I sent you.
Marty: I'll take care of it.
Jax: Okay, you have a good holiday.
Marty: Thank you.
Kate: Hey, Jax, hi.
Jax: Hey.
Kate: I just picked up your message. What's all this about going to Australia?
Jax: I'm going to spend Christmas with my mother.
Kate: Oh. That seems rather sudden.
Jax: Yes, it is. I'm -- I'm going to surprise her when she comes across the finish line of the Port Philips yacht race.
Kate: So is that actually on Christmas Day?
Jax: I hope so. It depends on the wind. Why?
Kate: I -- obviously, I should have asked you this sooner, but given our unexpected circumstances, I was wondering if you might, I don't know, want to spend Christmas together.
Carly: I'm going to say this again and I really need you to hear me, okay? And maybe I need to listen to myself. I didn't take Morgan away from you to punish you. I did it to keep my little boy safe after what happened to Michael.
Sonny: I know you believe that, but can you understand how it made me feel?
Carly: I'm starting to, okay? I am.
Sonny: Do you see the double standard in that?
Carly: No, I don't.
Sonny: Being around Jason, what he does is just as dangerous as what I do, right? But you spend all kinds of time with him.
Carly: Morgan doesn't. Jason doesn't see Morgan. Jason doesn't come here to the house. If I want to see Jason, I go see Jason.
Sonny: But you still see him all the time --
Carly: I don't see him.
Sonny: Which means you blame me more than you blame Jason.
Carly: I don't want to have this fight. I don't -- I don't want to have this fight with you right now. It's Christmas. Morgan's right upstairs.
Sonny: I understand that, but if you want to heal, we have to be completely honest with each other. Just admit it. I mean, you still blame me for what happened with Michael.
Officer: We're going downtown.
Luke: Oh, gosh.
Mac: That won't be necessary.
Luke: Oh, thank God you're here.
Mac: I'll take it from here. Lose the cuffs, all right? Call the coroner. Start working the scene.
Luke: Perfect timing, bubba, perfect.
Robert: For once.
Mac: You know, if I wasn't so happy to see you, I'd punch your lights out.
Spinelli: Okay, even a refined search within a 20-mile radius provides disparate and multiple results. There's a machine shop, a clothing store, even a winery.
Jason: Hold on, hold on. All right, Sasha told me that her men grabbed Sam and drove her out of town.
Spinelli: Okay, did they indicate in which direction?
Jason: No, no, but she said that Sam escaped. She ran away, the men went after her, and then she said that Sam had fallen and trapped herself.
Spinelli: Meaning something fell on her? She got tangled in vines and ensnared in a heartless trap for woodland creatures?
Jason: Well, you know what? Check parks. Check mines. Check quarries. Just check everything right outside of town.
Spinelli: Okay -- okay, here's -- here's something. It's a quarry that's been closed for a number of years. It was best known for producing white granite.
Jason: Get me a map.
Sam: 83 bottles of beer on the wall. 83 bottles of beer. Take one, you pass it around, 82 bottles of beer on the wall. 82 bottles -- ow!
Jan 11, 2009 03:41
Claudia: Well, that was definitely worth taking a little risk, wasn't it?
Ric: Oh, you definitely like to push the limits.
Claudia: What, you don't?
Ric: No, it just doesn't make sense, though. I mean, if you're trying to gain Sonny's trust, why are you doing this?
Claudia: You worry too much. Sonny's already starting to trust me.
Ric: So you think if you're going to gain Sonny's trust that he's going to somehow give you more power in the organization, huh?
Claudia: Mm-hmm.
Ric: Well.
Claudia: Matter of fact, yeah, I do. That is the plan.
Ric: Well, I had a similar plan once, Claudia. I thought if I was going to -- my brother would trust me more, he would fold me into the organization. Well, guess what? That never happened.
Claudia: Do you know why that is?
Ric: Yeah, I made some serious mistakes where Carly was concerned years ago. Look, once Sonny doesn't trust you, that's it. There's no going back. Can't you move out? I mean, this is a business arrangement, after all. I think your father would completely understand.
Claudia: Sonny wouldn't.
Ric: Oh, don't be so sure. It could be much more convenient for all of us, especially us.
Claudia: I'm not moving, Ric.
Ric: Okay. All right, well you better be sure that you stay in Sonny's good graces, because that little Christmas ornament thing today, that's just the tip of the iceberg. Look, if Sonny feels betrayed -- you don't want to know, Claudia. There's no telling what'll happen.
Claudia: Okay, well, look. Just because you couldn't win his trust does not mean that I can't.
Ric: Okay, so you stay.
Claudia: Yeah, I'm staying, because I really don't see how it's possible for me to leave at this point.
Carly: Jason says we're all responsible for what happened to Michael, that we glorified the business and we denied how dangerous it is. But I'm his mother, Sonny. At the end of the day, the responsibility is on me.
Sonny: We've all made mistakes, too many of them.
Carly: Morgan shouldn't have to pay for those mistakes. We need to think about what he needs, and I think -- he needs both of us. And I was hoping that this Christmas could be, you know -- well, the beginning. You can see Morgan again, but you just -- you have to swear to me that you're going to keep him safe, and you have to know that you have his precious little life in your hands.
Sonny: That's why I'm doing exactly what I'm doing.
Carly: Okay, well, you know, we can't lie to Morgan and tell him he's safe when he's not, but if you and I are honest with each other and if we talk to each other, we can make this work.
Sonny: I appreciate what you're doing, and I know -- what it cost you. Hey. What do you got, buddy?
Morgan: It's a Christmas angel, like Michael.
Sonny: Aw. Thank you.
Carly: Hey, how about we put that on the Christmas tree? Yeah? Okay, go on.
Sonny: Why don't you put it over here? Look, what do you think? Maybe right there? No? Okay. How's that? Let's go show your ma. How's that look?
Carly: It's perfect.
Sonny: Perfect. Beautiful, all right. What do you think?
Morgan: Now it's -- now Michael's watching over us, just like Daddy said.
Sonny: Merry Christmas, buddy.
Luke: Mac, I swear to you, we had nothing to with the blonde.
Robert: We? Hey, look, when I got here, she was dead. Now, I can't speak for him --
Mac: Relax. I don't suspect either one of you.
Robert: Well, you know what to do. Round up the usual suspects who were at the scene, yada yada yada.
Mac: Drop it, all right? Don't tell me how to do my job. I've been police commissioner around here a lot longer than you ever were.
Robert: No comment.
Mac: What are you doing here? Luke, I swear -- I swear, if you got him out of the hospital and got him involved into one of your schemes --
Luke: Mac, come on. Can't a guy just take a stroll on the waterfront, get some air?
Robert: Look, I just ran into him. I don't know anything about contraband.
Mac: Contraband? Speaking of contraband, we just busted a guy down at the free clinic waiting in line for bursitis cream. He can't explain the six crates of Cuban cigars in the back of his van.
Luke: The free clinic, you say? I got to split. I don't want to get in the way of a nice brotherly reunion.
Robert: Thanks for letting me go.
Mac: Robert, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in Switzerland?
Robert: The r-word, little brother -- remission.
Mac: Oh, that's great. Congratulations. I knew you'd beat it. Have you seen Robin?
Robert: Mm-hmm, yeah. She wants me to walk her down the aisle.
Mac: That's great. That's perfect. All right, yeah.
Robert: I can't do it.
Mac: What, are you nuts? Did that chemo fry your brain cells?
Robert: I've never been this model parent. You should do it.
Mac: I've already done it, all right? Now Robin's giving you the chance to step up.
Robert: But I don't feel right. I mean, you did all the heavy work.
Mac: Listen, I'll give you a choice, all right? You either walk Robin down the aisle and be grateful for the opportunity or sit out the wedding in jail. Your choice.
Anna: You know, I mean, it's lovely that you would like me to be your matron of honor, but you know, Maxie --
Robin: Mom, Maxie will understand.
Anna: Would she really?
Robin: Yes.
Anna: It's enough that I'm mother of the bride. I mean, that's honor enough.
Robin: Okay, I'm pretty fuzzy on what happened right after Emma was born, but I do remember being extremely tired, and you made me take your hand, and you told me to take the strength from you, and so now I'd like to share this day with you.
Anna: Are you absolutely sure?
Robin: Yes. I mean, you're the one that helped me find the courage to marry Patrick. You're the best role model that a woman could have, and I would be honored for you to stand next to me on the most important day of my life. All you have to do is say yes.
Anna: Yes.
Kate: Okay, if this makes any difference whatsoever, it is not a romantic overture. It's just an invitation from one Christmas orphan to another.
Jax: Aw, come on. You're hardly a Christmas orphan. What about Olivia?
Kate: Olivia, yeah. Well, she's spending Christmas in Bensonhurst.
Jax: So why don't you join her?
[Kate laughs]
Kate: I've think I've had enough family I can handle for one year.
Jax: Oh, come on. I know you miss your family.
Kate: Yeah, well, you know. It's just it's been -- it's been too long, Jax, and it would end up being one big old fight, a fight that I would lose, and it's not that I blame the Falconeri. It's just -- I'm really tired of fighting.
Jax: Yeah, I know what you're talking about.
Kate: Okay, so then what will it take to get you to stay? Look, we'll go to the City.
Jax: I can't. I'm sorry, Kate.
Kate: There's no better place than Manhattan at Christmas --
Jax: I can't. I'm really concerned about Lady Jane. You know, she'll never admit that she's upset about Jerry, but I know she is.
Kate: I understand. Oh, look at us. We're just really a couple of fools, aren't we? You're going to Australia to avoid Carly, and I want you to stay so that I don't end up on Sonny's doorstep Christmas morning trying to work things out.
Jason: Sam!
Jason: Sam. Oh, man, you're freezing. Here.
Sam: Jason.
Sam: Jason. How'd you find me?
Jason: Spinelli found you. It's okay. You're going to be all right.
Robin: This is why it pays to be related to the police commissioner.
Robert: Hmm, I can see. I mean, instead of arresting me, he drives me home for dinner now. When I was police commissioner, I never did that.
Patrick: No, you got off easy.
Robin: Uncle Mac arrested Patrick and locked us in the interrogation room until we agreed to get married.
Patrick: That's right.
Robert: You didn't want to marry my daughter? I mean, what kind of an insufferable clod's coming into the family?
Anna: I don't know. It takes one to know one, doesn't it?
Robin: Ooh.
Mac: Now, listen, just to be clear -- just to be clear, Robert's going to walk you down the aisle, and I'll be sitting in the front row, cheering you two on.
Robin: Thank you. You always manage to fix everything. Okay, and guess who's going to be the matron of honor.
Anna: That would be me.
Mac: Aw.
Robin: I talked to Maxie about it already.
Robert: Okay, that's good.
Mac: You don't have much to say for yourself.
Patrick: I know better.
[Laughter]
Mac: You had a lot of courage to wade into all these Scorpios.
Anna: Oh, yeah.
Robin: Okay, I would like to propose a toast. To my man, my mom, my dad, my uncle, my little girl.
Robin: We may have not always been conventional or done things perfectly, but all of you have taught me what family really means, and you've encouraged me to start one of my own. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for supporting me and standing by me. I love you guys. To family.
Everyone: Family.
Spinelli: Hello? 'Tis I, the Jackal.
Sam: Spinelli.
Jason: Yeah, he sent this down. Do you remember that?
Spinelli: Fair Samantha, hi. I've alerted the rescue squad, and they're arriving forthwith to extract you from the pit of doom.
Jason: Go wait by the road. Tell the ambulance we're down here, okay?
Spinelli: Message received. Over and out.
Sam: I'm so sleepy.
Jason: Hey, it's hypothermia. You got to stay awake.
Sam: It's just that I still don't understand how you found me.
Jason: Like I told you, Sasha gave me a clue, and Spinelli was the one who did the research, like I said.
Sam: You two make a good team.
Jason: Hey, come on. You got to stay awake, okay? Just keep talking to me.
Sam: About what, Jason?
Jason: About anything. I mean, do you know how long you've been down here?
Sam: No, but I have had the craziest dreams.
Jason: Okay, okay, keep talking.
Sam: Jake -- I was in the park, and -- I didn't let Maureen walk away with him, and I gave him to Elizabeth. I gave him back, Jason. I just -- I wish it was true. I wish it was real. I am so sorry.
Claudia: Welcome home.
Sonny: Thanks. About before --
Claudia: Don't worry about it. You want a glass of wine?
Sonny: Oh, that'd be great. Oh, so you fixed the ornament.
Claudia: Yeah, nothing a couple drops of glue couldn't fix.
Sonny: Some Christmas, huh?
Claudia: I've had worse.
Sonny: Merry Christmas, Mrs. Corinthos.
Claudia: Merry Christmas.
Morgan: Yay, we made it.
Carly: We're so glad we caught you before you left for Australia.
Jax: So am I.
Carly: We forgot to give you your Christmas present. Merry Christmas.
Jax: Thank you. Merry Christmas to both of you.
Morgan: Is that mistletoe?
Carly: Well, how about that?
Jax: How about that, huh? Did your mom and you plan this together, huh?
Morgan: Mm-mm, mm-mm.
Carly: Would we do something like that?
Morgan: You're supposed to kiss because it's Christmas.
Jan 11, 2009 03:43
[Sleigh bells jingling]
Lulu: Merry Christmas Eve.
Lucky: What are you doing here?
Lulu: Johnny had to work and I know Elizabeth and her grandma took the boys out of town, so I thought, I don't know, we could hang out, maybe order pizza?
Lucky: Yeah, well, not much of a Christmas celebration.
Lulu: You didn't have other plans, did you?
Lucky: Sadly, no.
Nikolas: Hello. I just dropped Spencer off. Mike's taking him to that hospital Christmas party.
Lulu: You're not going?
Nikolas: No. No, I'm not. You know how many times I watched Emily play an elf for those children? I'm just really not ready to go yet.
Lulu: Great, pizza for three.
Lulu: I got it.
Patrick: Hey, Robin, I got some eggnog lattes here.
Robin: Eggnog lattes? The apartment is a mess, the tree is half-decorated, my parents are going to be here any second, and let me guess -- you forgot to pick up the dessert that I ordered.
Patrick: I'll go back and get it.
Robin: No, you know what? It's Christmas Eve. They closed 20 minutes ago. But, hey, we've got eggnog lattes.
Edward: This house may be a holiday-free zone, but at least we can be miserable with the lights on.
Monica: Merry... whatever.
Tracy: What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be at the hospital Christmas party.
Monica: Well, I'm not going.
Tracy: You have to go, Monica. You're chief of staff, remember?
Edward: Why aren't you dressed for the holiday party, Tracy?
Tracy: I'm staying home.
Monica: Well, now, that's actually a reason for me to go.
Alice: Hey, time to get jolly, everyone. I've got eggnog and a tree.
Monica: Bah.
Edward: Hum.
Tracy: Bug.
Man: Worthless piece of junk. Why couldn't she have knitted me a pair of mittens like every other year?
Spinelli: Uh, excuse me?
Santa: Spinelli! There you are. I'm having trouble with this gadget that Mrs. Claus gave --
Spinelli: Not another step, demented intruder. I assure you, the Jackal is a master of -- of kung fu.
Santa: Young man, I know if each and every child on earth has been naughty or nice, so I also know who can do martial arts and who can't, so put your foot down and come take a look at this.
Spinelli: Can I? Oh, my God. Santa?
Santa: That's right. Now, I need your help and we don't have much time.
Santa: My reindeer are waiting on the roof of that fine establishment across the street.
Spinelli: The Metro Court Hotel?
Santa: Oh, I took a few carrots from the fridge. I hope you don't mind.
Spinelli: No, that's fine.
[Spinelli chuckles]
Spinelli: Oh. Dasher, Dancer, Prancer. Um, where's Rudolph?
Santa: It's a clear night for flying, so I left him at home. Any luck?
Spinelli: Oh, oh, right. Well, uh, it appears you've deleted an extensive amount of data.
Santa: Mrs. Claus gave me this as a gift, but I'm all thumbs when it comes to these new-fangled gadgets. Somehow or another, I erased the Christmas list for most of Port Charles. Okay, I'll be back at 11:59. You find out what everyone wants. And if you can fix this PDA while you're at it, there might be something extra in your stocking.
Spinelli: Oh, gosh, uh -- please, I beseech you, just remain stationary for about a moment. Oh, my gosh --
Maxie: The Paris emails finally came through --
Spinelli: Maximista is about to witness a Christmas event of epic proportions.
Maxie: Spinelli, how sweet. You put ornaments on the tree.
Spinelli: He's gone.
Maxie: Who, Jason?
Spinelli: No, Santa.
Maxie: And now you're pretending Santa was here?
Spinelli: He was here.
Maxie: Let me guess. This is all a build up. You're going to give me a cool present and say Santa gave it to you.
Spinelli: Ooh, look. He left his PDA.
Maxie: I already have a PDA.
Spinelli: No, this is Santa's PDA, but it's not functioning properly. He can't access the wish list of many Port Charles residents.
Maxie: Santa told you this?
Spinelli: And unfortunately, a cursory search suggested the data is irretrievable.
Maxie: You're saying Santa gave you that?
Spinelli: He -- he did. And he'll be back one minute before midnight to retrieve it. I cannot fail him.
Maxie: You really believe Santa was here?
Spinelli: He was.
Spinelli: See? He left his jacket.
Max: Merry Christmas. Sorry I'm late. Diane?
Diane: You know, it's the oddest thing. I was just standing here, looking up into the night sky, and right there, flying over Jason's building, I could have sworn I saw -- uh, never mind. Never mind. I guess I am just blissed out at the notion of spending Christmas with my guy at his home, wrapped in blankets, candles burning, carols playing, chestnuts roasting on an open fire.
Max: Yeah, well, maybe they'll even have them on the room service menu.
Diane: Room service?
Max: I booked us a room at the Metro Court.
Diane: This was supposed to be an "at home" Christmas. Specifically, your home, considering you extended the invitation.
Max: Unfortunately, there were complications.
[Diane clears throat]
Diane: Power failure? Leaky pipes?
Max: Out of town guests.
Diane: Guests?
Max: They're not exactly guests. They're more like, uh, business associates, if you get my meaning.
Diane: Heavy hitters?
Max: The heaviest. They're in town from Miami. They needed a place to lay low.
Diane: Well, then why can't you book them a room at the Metro Court?
Max: Diane, the boss asked me to put them up for the week --
Diane: The boss, the boss, the boss. You know what? Sonny, yes, is a selfish and demanding brute, but if you can't even stand up to him and tell him you want to spend Christmas in your home, with your girl -- I was just about to call myself "your girlfriend," but clearly you don't think of me that way.
Max: Diane, you know that --
Diane: Oh, you know what? You can just forget the puppy dog eyes. You don't want to spend Christmas with me, fine. I don't want to spend it with you.
Luke: Anybody order pizza?
Lulu: Dad? Hey.
Luke: Hi, baby girl.
Lulu: Hey. How much have you been drinking?
Luke: Not nearly enough, but the night is still young.
Nikolas: You do realize it's Christmas Eve tonight, right?
Luke: Yeah, where's your tree?
Lucky: I didn't get around to getting one.
Lulu: Well, Johnny is working at the Christmas tree lot. It's open until midnight. We could go over there.
Luke: You know what? Problem solved. Look outside.
Lulu: I got it. Yep, there's a tree in our driveway.
Nikolas: I'll bring it in.
Luke: How do you like that?
Lucky: What, you bought -- you bought a tree?
Luke: No, no, not exactly, no.
Lulu: You didn't steal it, did you?
Luke: Oh, come on, daughter, this is Christmas Eve, no. Check this out. I'm crossing the street, and this flatbed comes flying around the corner on two wheels, almost tipped over, but that piece of festive cargo just rolled off the back of the truck and right up to your door. Damn.
Lulu: Wow. Ooh.
Nikolas: I'm okay. I'm okay.
Lulu: It's perfect.
Nikolas: Okay, question -- why isn't anybody helping me?
Lucky: Because you're the eldest. All right, I'll give you a hand.
Maxie: Merry, Merry!
Spinelli: Yuletide greetings to all.
Lulu: Hi, you guys. Spinelli, you're very festive.
Maxie: Isn't he?
Luke: Where'd you get the Santa suit?
Spinelli: I procured it from Father Christmas --
Maxie: A costume store. There's lots of Santa suits there.
Lulu: So, I mean, if you guys want to be here, there's pizza if you want to eat with us.
Spinelli: Actually, Maximista and the Jingle Jackal have a very busy nocturnal schedule, so we must decline.
Maxie: Yeah, we're going around wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and asking what they are wishing for.
Lulu: You guys okay? You guys look really weird.
Spinelli: Fair Lulu, this is for you. It will guarantee you a very Merry Christmas.
Spinelli: Take it and enjoy in the spirit of the season.
Lulu: You're giving me a key.
Spinelli: Father Christmas does indeed work in mysterious ways.
Maxie: Okay, we have place to go, people to see, so Merry Christmas!
Spinelli: Bye.
Lulu: Merry Christmas.
Luke: Sure you don't want to stay for pizza?
Lulu: This is the weirdest thing Spinelli's ever done, if that's even possible.
Lucky: Well, who cares? We have a tree to decorate.
Nikolas: Yeah, where are the decorations at?
Lucky: In the attic. Come on.
Luke: I hate Christmas.
Lulu: On general principle or because you miss Mom?
Luke: Both, I guess.
Diane: You know, it's not as if I had unreasonable expectations. I just wanted a nice, casual Christmas. Hot toddies and some Christmas carols and a moderately expensive bauble or two. But I am shunted aside by Max so he can harbor fugitive Miami heat.
Bernie: Did you know that Hanukkah is a celebration of light?
Diane: Yeah. And then, he's got the nerve to look all wounded, all sweet and helpless. Well, mark my words. It's not going to work. I have spent many Christmases chalking up billable hours, and I can spend this Christmas exactly the same way. In fact, that's a great idea. I think I will redraft every contract I have on file for Sonny and charge him triple.
Bernie: Hanukkah also -- it symbolizes the triumph of faith over tyranny.
Diane: Well, sometimes one's faith does go unrewarded. Mine certainly did. I put my faith and trust in this big, handsome, flexible hunk, and he leaves me flat on what is arguably the most romantic -
Bernie: I'm sorry, I'm sorry -- so sorry. I thought you said that you left Max.
Diane: With my head held high. Walked away, left him in my dust.
Bernie: So you're the one who doesn't want to spend Christmas with him.
Diane: No, no. I mean, yes, I want to spend Christmas with Max. He just doesn't want to spend it with me.
Bernie: But how's he supposed to know that if you just walk out and leave him? Listen, I'm a widower, and, um, my family -- well, what's left of it -- is spread out all over. And there's no way we're going to spend this holiday together, but -- you know, illness and money problems. I am going to spend the day waiting for some sensitive material to arrive from Mr. Morgan.
Diane: I know. I'm sorry, Bernie. It never occurred to me that -
Bernie: No, no, no. I'm not asking for sympathy. I'm pointing something out, which is that every Hanukkah, everybody in my family lights the Menorah candles. It's really -- it's like a way of being together.
Diane: That's a lovely custom.
Bernie: So have you ever inquired about Max's customs? I mean, how does he like to spend the holiday?
Diane: I thought he wanted to spend it with me.
Patrick: I'll help you clean up, then.
Robin: I'm not cleaning. I'm looking.
Patrick: For what?
[Robin groans]
Robin: The necklace that my grandmother Filomena gave my mother on her wedding day, and then my mother gave it to me on our wedding day, and now I can't find it.
Patrick: Okay, well, then I'll help you look for it.
Robin: No, I have searched every inch of this apartment, and it is nowhere to be found.
Patrick: Robin, where did you wear it last?
Robin: I wore it when we went out to eat. And then we came home, I was holding Emma. She was crying. And then she kept trying to pull on the pearl, so I took it off and I put it somewhere.
Patrick: Well, where?
Robin: Obviously, I don't remember.
Patrick: Okay, well, chances are it's around here somewhere underneath all this mess.
Robin: Well, maybe there wouldn't be such a big mess if you would help me clean up every once and a while.
Patrick: I would help you clean up if you didn't burst into tears and bite my head off every single time I try.
Robin: Great. There's my mom and dad. Do not tell my mother that I can't find the necklace.
Robert: Ho, ho, ho!
Anna: Hi. Merry Christmas Eve.
Patrick: Nice to see you. How are you feeling?
Robert: I'm feeling great, and I'm grateful to be here for another Christmas.
Robin: Hi, Mom.
Anna: Hi, sweetie.
Robin: Merry Christmas Eve.
Robert: Hey, baby.
Robin: Hi, Daddy. Um, sorry about the mess, you guys. Just, you know, just kick your way through it.
Anna: Oh, it's not so bad.
Robin: Oh, it is. Thank you, you're being very nice.
Anna: Yeah, I am being nice. But it's fine for things to be a little bit messy because you've got a new baby. And she's only small for a little while, so you might as well enjoy it while you can.
Robin: The voice of experience.
Anna: You know who told me that? Filomena told me that. And she was absolutely right. Great advice. And that little pearl necklace of Filomena's would look great with that blouse.
Robin: Yeah, maybe. I'll put it on later. Dad, why don't you have an eggnog latte, and I'll get us some cheese and crackers.
Anna: You know what? It's Christmas Eve. Why don't we have desert first?
Robert: That's good thinking. If it's one thing I can identify with in the last year, it's to go for the sweet stuff first.
Anna: Yeah, go for the good stuff.
Robin: Well, there won't be any desert --
Robin: Because --
Patrick: Maybe that's Santa. Maybe he's got some figgy pudding.
Maxie: Merry Christmas!
Spinelli: Merry Christmas.
Anna: Oh, it is Santa. You're here early.
Spinelli: Oh, I'm just a humble representative of the fine fabled man, I mean --
Maxie: We're here to spread the holiday cheer. Does everybody know what they want for Christmas?
Spinelli: Oh, yes, yes, yes. Did the Drake/Scorpio clan comprise their Christmas list and check it twice?
Anna: Uh-uh.
Robin: We already have everything we need.
Spinelli: Well, allow me to contribute something to this night's festivities. Merry Christmas to the new mother.
Robin: Thank you, Spinelli. I didn't expect you to bring me a gift.
Maxie: Neither did I.
Spinelli: I can't take the credit, because this isn't my coat --
Maxie: Spinelli's extremely modest and gratitude makes him nervous, so Merry Christmas. Enjoy. Bye!
Anna: Okay, Merry Christmas.
Maxie: Happy holidays.
Anna: Thanks.
Robert: Ah, computer geeks. They're all crazy, you know, but you can't do a decent op without them.
Anna: No, that's true.
Patrick: What did he get you?
Robin: Uh, they look like Christmas cookies, but I'm almost afraid to try one.
Anna: Well, I'm not. Let me see.
Robin: Mom.
Anna: No, come on.
Robin: You don't know Spinelli very well.
Anna: How dangerous can they be? They're Christmas cookies, right?
Robert: Hmm?
Anna: Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
Robin: Mom? Mom, are you okay?
Anna: You have to taste this.
Patrick: You know what? I'm sure Spinelli didn't mean any harm.
Anna: No, no, no, you have to taste this. Tell me what you think. Am I right?
Robert: Oh, yeah.
Anna: I know, right?
Robert: Oh, yeah, but it's not possible. It's not possible.
Robin: Well, what? What's not possible?
Anna: Darling, taste it. Please, taste it.
Patrick: No, no, no, no, no. I don't want Robin ingesting anything that came from Spinelli.
Robert: Oh, come on. Look, we're her parents. We wouldn't do anything to hurt her, come on.
Anna: Eat that. Tell me what it reminds you of. Go on.
Robin: What it -- okay.
Robin: That's impossible. She never even wrote down the recipe.
Patrick: Okay, is this some holiday ritual designed to keep the new son-in-law out of the loop here? What's going on?
Robin: These -- my grandmother Filomena, she used to bake the most amazing Christmas cookies. And she always promised me that she would give me the recipe, but she died before she could. I mean, I haven't had these since I was a little girl. And I don't know how they wound up in Spinelli's pocket, but these are definitely Filomena's Christmas cookies.
Lucky: Come on, why don't you help us, Dad?
Luke: You're doing fine.
Lucky: You know, I really don't know how Mom put up with you when she loved Christmas so much.
Luke: You have a good point. She did love Christmas. Man, I found that out the first Christmas we spent in Texas.
Lulu: What do you mean?
Luke: Well, it was cold. There was a real -- lot of snow, and we trudged all over the place looking for a tree because she had to have a tree. Finally, we found one. A scrawny little thing, but she wouldn't let me chop it down. So we went back to the house and we got all the ornaments, and we came back and we decorated it right where it was. And then, she looked at the top and she said if anything ever needed an angel to watch over it, it's this sad little tree. So we had to get in the car and ramble into town. There was only one store open. And he had, I kid you not, he had one treetop angel, and we were short like a buck and change. But your mother batted her eyes at him and worked her wiles, and he gave us the angel for free and said, "Merry Christmas." We went back to the little tree, we put it on the top, then she was happy.
Jan 11, 2009 03:44
Edward: Lila so loved these holiday traditions. She could hardly wait to put the tree up so she could look at it for weeks.
Monica: And Emily loved to help her decorate it.
Edward: The two of them were the heart and soul of this family, and I just can't bear to have a tree without them.
Tracy: Well, who needs it anyway?
Alice: Well, we're still going to have Christmas dinner, right? Argue about the menu for old time's sake? How about some Yorkshire pudding and roast beef?
Edward: No.
Alice: Cranberry and squab?
Monica: Hmm-mm.
Alice: How about whatever Mr. Luke would have wanted if you hadn't thrown him out on Christmas Eve?
Tracy: "Mr. Puke" is not Tiny Tim. And if he wants a crutch, hmm, he can get it any liquor store in town.
Alan: What a bunch of whiners.
Tracy: You are in no position to criticize. You're not really here.
Monica: Oh, come on. You are not going to have your chat with Alan. You can't possibly be that insensitive.
Tracy: You know, I don't know what I find more annoying -- the two of you bickering when he was alive or you mooning over him now that he's not. Your cue to leave.
Alan: Not until you tell Monica that I love her.
Tracy: You have something to tell Monica? Tell her yourself.
Monica: Tracy, will you stop it.
Spinelli: Yuletide greetings to the quarrelsome clan.
Edward: Oh, for pity's sake.
Tracy: Alice, throw him out.
Maxie: Well, that's just rude. Spinelli's only trying to spread the holiday spirit.
Tracy: Throw her out, too.
Alice: Look, you guys, maybe you should just --
Spinelli: Please, uh, cease and desist, dominator. You see, the Jingle Jackal is compelled by unseen forces.
Edward: You see? He admits it. He is a dangerous psychotic.
Maxie: Hey, Spinelli is a wonderful person.
Alice: Oh, just save it. Your tidings of comfort and joy are wasted on this den of scrooges.
Spinelli: Please, you cannot turn the Jackal away until he's delivered his gift.
Robin: I guarantee you they are the best Christmas cookies you'll ever have.
Anna: Oops.
Robin: It's okay. There's plenty more.
Robin: What --
Patrick: Look what I found.
Robin: I looked under there three times.
Patrick: It was laying there by the cookie.
Robert: Isn't that the necklace that Filomena gave you on our wedding day?
Anna: Mm-hmm. I saved it to give to our daughter, and now you can give it to you daughter.
Patrick: And I will put it on you.
Robin: Okay. I know this is silly, but I think it's a sign.
Robert: You think?
Robin: Well, everybody knows that I have a tendency to worry that good things won't last, but this necklace has been through many generations, from a village in Italy to New York City to Port Charles. It's here to stay and so are we.
Lucky: Well, these are the last of them, so if that angel is not in here, we're out of luck.
Nikolas: Well, if it's not, I can certainly go out and buy another one.
Lulu: No, we need Mom's angel. It wouldn't be the same.
Lucky: Well, this one feels empty and it's locked, anyway. You know what? Maybe Mom's angel got thrown out by mistake.
Lulu: This may be really weird, but, I mean, maybe Spinelli's key...
Lucky: I told you that one felt empty.
Lulu: Oh, my gosh.
Lulu: It's here.
Luke: Spencers'. Hello, darling. Merry Christmas to you. Well, as a matter of fact, we were just talking about you.
Spinelli: Well, no doubt this gift has special meaning for one of you.
Edward: Well, it's your gift, you boob. You should know who it's for.
Maxie: Careful, Mr. Quartermaine. You wouldn't want Santa to leave you off his Christmas list this year.
Edward: Listen, twerp, a man can be as grumpy as he --
Tracy: Oh, my God. The hospital Christmas party would be better than this.
Edward: For once I agree with you, Tracy.
Alice: Oh, well, wonders never cease. It's a Christmas miracle after all. I'll drive. Hey, you want to go with us, Dr. Q?
Monica: Actually, Alice, I would rather sit here and listen to the two of them babble on.
Edward: Suit yourself. No, and I'm going to drive.
Spinelli: Since the others have departed, the Jackal's gift must be for you.
Monica: I am not interested in a gift, thank you very much. No, what I was interested in is my in-laws getting out of here. Now they have and you can do the same. Bye.
Alan: Big mistake, Monica.
Maxie: Big mistake, Monica. You don't refuse a gift that comes from an open heart, no matter how weird or useless it might seem. 'Tis the season and all that.
Monica: I have nothing to celebrate this Christmas, okay?
Maxie: Lots of us have reasons to be miserable. I have a few of my own. The trick is to find something to be grateful for, even if it's a gift you weren't expecting and aren't sure what to do with.
Spinelli: Please? In the spirit of the season?
Alan: Just do it, Monica.
Monica: No, thank you.
Spinelli: You know, I'll just leave them under the tree in case you change your mind.
Maxie: Merry Christmas.
Alan: Those glasses, they look familiar. I think that I threw a pair like those just as we were having one of our fights. I said that you needed glasses because you only saw what you wanted to see.
[Monica gasps]
Monica: Alan?
Alan: You can see me. You can hear me.
Monica: Is it really you?
Alan: Don't -- no, it's all right. It's all right.
Monica: How?
Alan: You don't ask how on Christmas.
Monica: I've never believed, really, in Christmas miracles. But if I were to get one, I'm so glad it's you.
Alan: Oh, Monica, you've had such a terrible time. You've suffered so many losses, but you're a fighter. Don't give up. You must do whatever it takes to go on with your life.
Monica: I don't know whether you are a ghost or I have finally just lost my mind, but at the moment, I don't care because you're standing right in front of me, the pompous ass you've always been.
[Monica laughs]
Alan: Pompous ass? I'm trying to help you.
Monica: What? By spouting meaningless advice?
Alan: Well, of course you would think it's meaningless because it came from me. And while we're on the subject, better pompous than promiscuous.
Monica: Oh, come on now, you cheated on me more than I ever cheated on you.
Alan: Oh, really? Let me give you a list. What about Rick Webber, Sean Donnelly, Pierce Dorman, my own nephew.
Monica: Oh, my God, I missed you so much.
Max: Maxie, you've got to help me.
Maxie: Max, you look upset. Is your dad okay?
Max: No, he's fine. He met a nice woman on the plane on the way back to Palermo. We could be looking at wife number seven here.
Maxie: No wonder you're upset. That's a lot of stepmothers for anyone to deal with.
Max: It's not my dad or his new girlfriend I'm worried about. It's Diane.
Spinelli: Has the brusque lady of justice been placed in peril?
Max: Only her heart. You know, we had all these plans for a romantic Christmas, but the boss needed to use my house for some out of town guests of the connected variety, so --
Maxie: Well, Christmas isn't about a specific place. It's about who you're with. The woman you love just wants to know that you want to be with her no matter where you are.
Spinelli: And to that end, the Jackal presents a solution to your yuletide dilemma.
Max: It's a pawn ticket.
Spinelli: Yeah, Merry Christmas, son of Maximus.
Diane: You know this was my Christmas present for the big lug, my Max. Warm heart, cold feet.
Bernie: Ms. Miller, would you like to sit down?
Diane: Oh, God, I'm such a bitch.
Spinelli: Festive greetings to all!
Bernie: Hi.
Maxie: Hi.
Bernie: Yeah, Bernie.
Maxie: Well, what are you doing here on Christmas Eve? Do I need to call Jason Morgan and tell him -
Bernie: No, no, Mr. Morgan didn't ask me to come. I volunteered.
Spinelli: Might the Jackal inquire as to why the typically tense lady of the law waxes tearful?
Diane: I was supposed to be spending Christmas with Max, but I bungled it.
Spinelli: Allow the Jingle Jackal to provide assistance.
[Cell phone ringing]
Spinelli: Call your beloved.
Diane: Excuse me?
Spinelli: Call him.
Max's voice: Diane?
Diane: Max? Max, where are you? Well, don't move. No, you stay right there. I'm on my way.
[Makes kissing noises]
Diane: Thank you, thank you. Oh, thank you, Mr. Grasshopper. Thank you, Bernie. And thank you, Maxie. Oh, I've got to hurry. Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah to all.
Bernie: I'll never understand. She's the best lawyer that I have ever met. She's tough as nails. She strikes fear into the heart of opposing counsel. She doesn't bat an eyelash at capital charges. She goes to pieces over a bodyguard. Love is strange. I'm sorry, is there something I can do for you?
Spinelli: We're here to deliver a gift.
Bernie: Well, okay. Oh, how did you know? That's just what I was wishing for.
Spinelli: Happy Holidays.
Maxie: Happy Hanukkah.
Diane: Oh, Max, chestnuts.
Monica: I always wondered how you managed to be chief of staff and then I found out you didn't.
Alan: I had that hospital running like a top.
Monica: Ah, no, you didn't, not at all. I've gone through all your records, and they are riddled with inconsistencies.
Alan: Oh, and you think you could do a better job?
Monica: Oh, I already am. I've hired a new specialist. I've expanded the budget for the surgical wing.
Alan: I can't believe you have such a God complex. I mean, you've always thought that you are the greatest cardiologist in the world.
Monica: And you have always been jealous of the fact that I can perform surgery.
Alan: I was a great surgeon until I ruined my hand trying to save your life.
Monica: After you tried to kill me.
Alan: Beside the point. You were cheating on me in my own house.
Monica: It's my house, Alan.
Alan: I gave it to you.
[Christmas music plays]
Alan: Merry Christmas, Monica.
Monica: Merry Christmas, Alan.
Max: It's just a little something.
Diane: That's incredible. Where did you find that?
Max: I probably shouldn't tell you, but it came from a pawn shop.
Diane: Well, now it comes from you.
Spinelli and Maxie: Jingle bells jingle all the way. Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh hey jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
[Bernie recites Hebrew blessings]
Robin: I love you.
Patrick: Merry Christmas.
Robin: Merry Christmas.
Luke: And the angel has landed.
Lucky, Nikolas, and Lulu: Merry Christmas, Mom. We love you.
Luke: You hear that? Merry Christmas, darling.
Maxie and Spinelli: Jingle bells jingle all the way oh what fun
Maxie: Santa? It really is you.
Santa: Maxie Jones, how kind of you to help Spinelli.
Spinelli: I'm afraid Santa is mistaken. Though I was able to fix your PDA, little more was accomplished.
Maxie: Yeah, we only made it to three houses, and we didn't find out what everyone wanted for Christmas.
Santa: Hello, I'm Santa Claus. I already know what everyone wants for Christmas.
Spinelli: Then what was the true purpose of the Jingle Jackal's mission?
Santa: It takes a very special person, one who's generous and good and true, to see into people's hearts.
Spinelli: Thank you, sir. I suppose you need this back. If the photo function on your PDA is working, might the Jackal be so bold as to maybe snap a picture?
Santa: Ho-ho-ho, of course.
Maxie: Here, wait.
Santa: Gather round.
Maxie: Okay, ready.
Spinelli: You too, Maxie. Okay.
Santa: Say "gingerbread."
Santa, Spinelli, and Maxie: Gingerbread!
Spinelli: Oh, might Mr. Claus hang around for some refreshments? We have milk and cookies.
Santa: Thank you, but I have some restless reindeer and a very long night ahead of me. Merry Christmas!
Spinelli: Come here.
Maxie: It's -- it's midnight. I have to visit Mac in the station.
Spinelli: Thanks for accompanying me tonight. Your presence was the shining star of my journey.
Maxie: Spinelli, Santa was right. You really are generous and good and true.
Spinelli: 'Tis I, the Jackal.
Maxie: Okay, I thought I was having a really wild dream, and then I woke up and there was a gift by my bed.
Spinelli: I've received a gift as well.
Maxie: You have to open it, Spinelli.
[Sleigh bells ringing]
Spinelli: Our picture with Santa.
Maxie: You were right about everything.
Spinelli: There truly is magic in this world, Maximista.
Maxie: And I'm glad we got a chance to share it.
Spinelli: Merry Christmas, Maxie.
Maxie: Merry Christmas, Spinelli.
Maxie and Spinelli: Merry Christmas, everyone.
Jan 11, 2009 03:45
Patrick: It's a big day for our little family, Emma. Today I get to marry your mother.
Patrick: Ooh, who's that?
Patrick: Hey.
Maxie: What are you doing here?
Patrick: I live here.
Maxie: Not today, you don't. Your suit is pressed and waiting for you at your apartment.
Patrick: I have plenty of time.
Maxie: Don't try to go to the hospital, because the staff has orders to turn you away at the door.
Patrick: Okay, relax, Maxie. It'll be okay.
Maxie: You relax. This time around, try being at the church on time. Get out of here.
Patrick: Okay. Bye, Emma.
Maxie: Emma, hi. You're okay. You're okay.
Robin: Hey.
Maxie: Hey.
Robin: Where did Patrick go?
Maxie: Well, I sent him away. He's not supposed to see you today, and after what happened last time, I'm not taking any chances. Are we, Emma? No, we're not. No.
Sam: Jason?
Lucky: No.
Spinelli: Stone Cold?
Jason: Are you okay?
Spinelli: Yeah, I was just -- I was in the throes of a most unsettling dream about your nocturnal mission, the difficulty of which is written on your face.
Jason: It's over.
Spinelli: The evildoers have been dispatched?
Jason: The Russians are pulling out of town.
Spinelli: So the threat has been removed, order has been restored, and now you can reconcile with Mr. Sir.
Sonny: I want the shipment landed on Pier 17. There won't be any trouble from Jason.
Claudia: You know I love a man who takes chances. You're landing a Zacchara shipment in one of Jason's territories? That's asking for trouble.
Robin: Belgian waffles?
Maxie: Nuts.
Robin: What?
Maxie: On top of the waffles. Aren't you allergic? I remember the Halloween parade in the fourth grade. It was like a real-life horror movie.
Robin: I think that was Carolyn Ramsey.
Maxie: I just don't want your face to swell while you're walking down the aisle.
Robin: I do not have allergies, and, besides, everything is going to be just fine.
Maxie: That's what we said last time, and then the groom went AWOL and my little cousin Emma decided to turn it into her own show. People think I'm selfish.
Robin: Well, don't worry. The baby nurse will be here to watch Emma during the ceremony.
Maxie: Baby nurse, Judy Chen from G.H., I spoke with her this morning. She should be on her way.
Maxie: Oh, see? Somebody's on time.
Mac: Hello.
Robin: Uncle Mac.
Maxie: We're running a very tight schedule, so you can give her all the fatherly advice she needs on the way to the church.
Mac: And that's why I'm here. Since Robert's giving you away, I'm going to be your personal chauffeur.
Maxie: Perfect, we can put the light on top of the car and run the siren.
Mac: That's for emergencies.
Maxie: This is an emergency. The way weddings have been going in this town, we're not taking any chances. Okay, your dress and your shoes are waiting for you at the church. There's a light blue bag for you to put your clothes in after you change. Hey, cross-town traffic is really bad, so stay away from Marlton Square and leave as soon as the baby nurse gets here.
Mac: Scout's honor.
Maxie: This is going to be the happiest day of your life if it kills me!
Robin: Stone doesn't have that much time left, and of course he wonders how it's going to be for me. He asked me to get tested again, and that was fine with me because it was almost time for the six-month test anyway and I wanted to be able to tell him that I was okay. So I asked Alan to give me the test and he brought over the results last night. I'm HIV positive.
Robin: It's hard to believe, isn't it, that I'm a mom and that I'm getting married? It's hard for me to believe.
Mac: I was just remembering the day you told me you were HIV positive. No matter how hard I tried to hope, I was always afraid this day would never come, which makes it all the more precious.
Mac: Hello, stinky.
Lucky: The doctors -- they did x-rays and an MRI on your bad hip. You didn't break anything when you fell.
Sam: Well, I guess that is good news.
Lucky: The bigger concern was that you were suffering from severe hypothermia when you were brought in. Fortunately, Jason knew enough to keep your core temperature from dropping any further while the ambulance was on its way.
Sam: Listen, Lucky, the reason why I called you Jason when you walked in --
Lucky: He saved you.
Sam: No, uh-uh, it's not that. It's just because that his face was the last face that I saw before I passed out.
Lucky: Let's just forget it. Let's just talk about why you needed saving, the fact that you almost died again.
Sam: Come on, you know that Sasha was the one calling all the shots when Jake was kidnapped.
Lucky: And you decided to go after her single-handedly?
Sam: She tried to kill me, Lucky, more than once. I wasn't going to wait for her to do it again.
Lucky: You didn't trust me enough to tell me this?
Sam: I knew what you were going to say.
Lucky: And why waste your breath with somebody who doesn't give you the answers you always want to hear.
Sam: No, I'm not going to apologize for doing something that I thought was --
Lucky: You never do. I'm glad you're feeling better.
Spinelli: While monitoring police reports last night, I couldn't help but notice reports of multiple explosions at syndicate-controlled warehouses, carefully placed charges that touched not a blade of neighboring grass but caused utter destruction. Stone Cold descended under the cloak of darkness like the Goth god of Zune on the evildoers.
Jason: The Russians lost the only local players they had who knew the territory, so the smart business move for them is to get the hell out of town.
Spinelli: So the laws of economics would dictate. You know, it is fitting that the master rid the town of such a scourge, and as this new day is dawning, with the hour of the long-overdue Scorpio/Drake wedding approaching --
Jason: Yeah, and I'm not going to be going this time.
Spinelli: Well, I will convey your best wishes and do my best to be a worthy emissary.
Jason: Thank you. Shouldn't you be getting ready?
Spinelli: Yeah, Maximista fast approaches. I should go don my dapper attire. I couldn't help but notice Stone Cold avoided the question I posed earlier about a reconciliation with Mr. Sir.
Jason: Well, you know, I want peace with Sonny, Spinelli, but he may be in too deep with the Zaccharas, so I don't even know if that's possible anymore.
Sonny: Jason is focused on the Russians. He's making a move right now to stop them. I'm actually doing him a favor by using his piers. By the end I'll have a foothold.
Claudia: Yeah, but you're assuming that Jason's not going to fight back.
Sonny: Well, he's not going to do anything right now.
Claudia: So you're just going to hope and wait?
Sonny: No, no, no, I'm going to go to the Queen of Angels church right now.
Claudia: To pray?
Sonny: No. Robin Scorpio is getting married today.
Claudia: You're not going to the ceremony, are you?
Sonny: She's a close friend of mine.
Claudia: Which is exactly why I would assume that you wouldn't want to rain on her happy day, I mean, given your history with weddings and churches.
Sonny: Why do you care?
Claudia: I'm just making an observation.
Sonny: Or are you just keeping track of my movements?
Claudia: You know what? You're being paranoid now.
Sonny: I'm imagining things?
Claudia: Yes.
Sonny: Just like I imagined when I came in here -- you, with the laptop? Was I imagining that, too?
Claudia: I just want you to respect my privacy, that's all.
Sonny: Well, I respect that, but don't insult my intelligence, because I didn't get where I am today being stupid and naive.
Claudia: I don't think that.
Sonny: But do you think I'm not going to find out what's really going on, what you're trying to hide? Huh? You know what? As far as the marriage goes, if we want to build on this thing, we want to, you know -- we got to trust each other. So why don't you go ahead and tell me.
Claudia: Okay, first I need you to promise that you won't get angry.
Sonny: Okay, well, I would never lay a hand on a woman. I promise that. What is it you're trying to hide?
Claudia: I am polyamorous. It means someone who can be with more than one partner. Not at one time, but --
Sonny: Claudia, I think I know what that means.
Claudia: Well, I'm attracted to you. I haven't made a secret out of that, but you think having sex would be too complicated for us, too big of a deal, so I'm kind of being forced to sneak around and hide.
Sonny: But the thing is you get around --
Claudia: Wait a minute. You know what? Don't be a prude.
Sonny: I mean, with my brother, it's kind of like --
Claudia: Aw, Ric. Poor Ric.
Sonny: It just doesn't -- what do you mean?
Claudia: He wants to play with the big boys. He wants to swim with sharks.
Sonny: Well, look, what is it you're trying to tell me here?
Claudia: I just think he's funny because he -- that girl Elizabeth Webber really did a number on him. He still believes in true love and undying love and love at first sight, and it doesn't exist. It doesn't happen.
Sonny: You're wrong. My friend Robin used to be in love with this kid named Stone. Got a bad break.
Claudia: What happened to him?
Sonny: He died of aids.
Claudia: The guy that infected her?
Sonny: True love, undying love, the kind that, you know, nothing could stop them. I don't know what I mean. What am I even telling you this for? I got a bride to go see.
Mac: Okay, have no fear. The bride is here.
Robin: The siren, not necessary.
Anna: No, I think it was very necessary.
Mac: That was Maxie's idea.
Robin: I feel like Obama.
Anna: Well, we don't want anything to go wrong this time, and Maxie's put the fear of God in us.
Robin: I know. I mean, I appreciate everything she's doing, but she's driving me a little crazy.
Anna: That's why I asked for some private time with you to do your makeup.
Robin: Good.
Mac: Okay, well, listen, my job is done here. Just let Maxie handle the details. No speeches, but I love you.
Robin: I love you, too.
Mac: Okay.
Robin: Bye.
Mac: Bye-bye.
Robin: See you soon.
Mac: All right.
Anna: See you in a bit. Listen, if you see your brother, he needs a little propping up. Yeah, I know. I'm so glad we kind of had a little practice the last time. It's good. We shouldn't make any mistakes. I'm really glad my strong-willed granddaughter made her entry when she did. She's so pushy.
Robin: She is. She's a lot like us.
Anna: Yeah. I'm so proud. I love you very much.
Anna: Let's get started.
Mac: Okay, okay, you can relax, all right? I got Robin here without incident. Anna's getting her ready now, and don't listen to Maxie.
Robert: About what?
Mac: About something going wrong.
Robert: Why would Maxie think that something's going to go wrong?
Mac: Because of what happened last time. Okay, Maxie's all stressed out and I thought that's what -- wait a minute. I recognize that look. I saw it in the mirror the morning I was going to walk Robin down the aisle. It isn't stress. It's terror.
Robert: Bloody right.
Mac: Well, I'm really glad the first wedding didn't come off.
Robert: So you're happy that you can see me here and melt down in person?
Mac: I'm happy you're going to walk Robin down the aisle.
Robert: Don't think I'm not grateful to be here. You know, I haven't forgotten the fact that a lot of what we're doing here now is largely due to you. I mean, you're the one that saw her through all the tough stuff -- the HIV, the loss of her first love. I never thanked you for that.
Mac: You don't have to thank me, all right? You just -- look, it wasn't your choice. I'm just grateful you entrusted Robin to me.
Robert: You did good, little brother. You did real good.
Maxie: I'm only here to get Spinelli for the wedding.
Jason: He'll be right down. Is everything going okay?
Maxie: So far, so good. I don't know why I bother. I could knock until I have splinters, but the mob population in this town is like a huge ax hanging over the altar. The odds are already stacked against Patrick and Robin.
Spinelli: What would prompt Maximista to make such a dire prediction?
Maxie: If I've learned anything from history, it's that huge weddings in this town always end in disaster.
Spinelli: Well, rest assured the potential for violence has been greatly reduced.
Maxie: Then it will be something else -- a power outage?
Spinelli: I will personally monitor the grid.
Maxie: A natural disaster.
Spinelli: The national weather service has predicted clear skies with just a light --
Maxie: I can feel it in my bones, Spinelli. Something terrible is going to happen to Patrick and Robin before they get married.
Spinelli: Oh, that -- that -
Sonny: You're early. Want to make it up to the bride since last time you were so late?
Patrick: I can't wait to marry Robin.
Sonny: I wish I could see it.
Patrick: What do you mean?
Sonny: Well, circumstances have changed. I don't want to risk anything, you know, dangerous. So I'm not going to be making a public appearance, so that's why I just came by, to wish Robin well. I'm glad I ran into you. Can I -- do you have time?
Patrick: Yeah.
Sonny: I know you know how special Robin is and what she's been through in her life and how badly she's been hurt. You need to know that she's taking a leap of faith making this commitment and, you know, reaching for this happiness.
Patrick: I know how much this means to Robin, and I know how much it means to you. And I feel like the luckiest guy in the world that I'm the one she's making the leap with. And I promise I'm going to do everything in my power to give her everything that she deserves.
Jerry's voice: But I can understand that by now you're anxious to start the game, so I made the first clue a really easy one. The first DVD is hidden in the window to your soul. I mean, that's presuming that you have a soul.
Claudia: The window to my soul? The eyes are the window to the soul. My eyes? Rot in hell.
Jason: Claudia? What are you looking for?
Robert: Mind if I join you?
Patrick: No. Guess it's time for the father/son-in-law talk, huh?
Robert: Well, I don't know if there's a protocol for a little get-together like this. If there is, I don't know about it.
Patrick: Well, if you want to ask me anything, fire away.
Robert: Well, I was thinking rather than just you and I talking, let's imagine that you're having a chat to someone else, some other guy. But that other guy -- he's about to marry Emma. What do you think you might want to say to him, and what do you think he might want to hear in return?
Patrick: Well, I would -- I'd want to tell him that -- I'd want him to know that my little girl is the most precious creature who ever drew breath and that he's the luckiest guy in the world.
Robert: So far, so good.
Patrick: I would want to hear him say that he knew how blessed he was and that he knows that life isn't perfect but that he's committed to making it work. That he'll never intentionally hurt my little girl or bail on her or cheat on her. That he will promise to value her, honor her, but most importantly, promise to love her. And that he knows that relationships take work and that he will never ever take her for granted, and because of that, their love will grow more every year. That's the kind of life that I want with your daughter. With your blessing, of course.
Robert: That wasn't so difficult, was it?
Robin: Come in. Hi.
Anna: Hi. You look gorgeous.
Robin: Stop it. You can't make me cry.
Anna: I'm not going to.
Robin: I cannot have my mascara running down my cheeks when I walk down the aisle. Maxie will kill me.
Anna: She probably has wipes in your purse.
Robin: Probably.
Anna: She's so prepared. She won't have to be on red alert for much longer. Oh, you look so pretty.
Anna: Did you ever think this day would come?
Robin: Well, it's been a unique journey, to say the least.
Anna: Yeah. I can't believe I'm starting already.
Robin: I mean, after everything that's happened, everything that I've lost, everything that I've learned, it just makes today so special.
Anna: It's almost here. So -- I left your gift in the car. Okay, I'll be right back.
Robin: Okay. I'll be here.
Anna: Okay, I love you.
Robin: It's a mantilla. My mother wore it the first time she married my father. They were in this little Italian village and a peasant woman gave it to her. So, when I imagine my wedding, I see myself wearing it. Of course, it's kind of hard to find a dress to go with it, but somehow I've managed to create one in my head. It's a picture I've carried with me ever since I was a little girl.
Stone: Wow. You are going to make an amazing bride.
Robin: Come in.
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